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Sarah J. Maas

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“Are you all right?' I could still feel the clamminess of his hand upon mine as he spoke of what Amarantha had done. He brushed a thumb down my shoulder. 'It wasn't... easy.' He amended. 'I thought I'd vomit all over the floor.' I squeezed him a little tighter. 'I'm sorry you had to share those things- sorry you... sorry for all of it, Rhys.' I breathed in his scent, taking it deep into my lungs. Out- we had made it out. 'And I know it likely means nothing, but... I'm proud of you. That you were brave enough to tell them.' 'It doesn't mean nothing,' he said softly. 'That you feel that way about me- about today.' He kissed my temple, and warmth flickered along the bond. 'It means...' His wing curved closer around me. 'I don't have the words to tell you what it means.' But as that love, that joy and light shimmered through the bond... I understood.”

“He brushed a kiss to my brow, 'Ianthe sold out your sisters,' he said, his voice turning sharp and hard. 'It's only fitting that you use her to get Elain back.' He gripped the sides of my face, bringing us nose to nose. 'Do not get distracted. Do not linger. You are a warrior, and warriors know when to pick their fights.' I nodded, our breath mingling. Rhys growled. 'They took what is ours. And we do not allow these crimes to go unpunished.' His power rippled and swirled around me. 'You do not fear,' Rhys breathed. 'You do not falter. You do not yield. You go in, you get her, and you come out again.' I nodded again, holding his stare. 'Remember that you are a wolf. And you cannot be caged.' He kissed my brow one more time, my blood thrumming and boiling in me, howling to draw blood.”

“You knew I was his mate when we went. I don't see how being High Lady alters anything.' 'It does.' I put my hands on my hips, ignoring his motion to continue. 'Why?' Cassian dragged a hand through his hair. 'Because... because as his mate, you were still... his to protect. Oh, don't get that look. He's yours to protect, too. I would have laid my life down for you as his mate- and as your friend. But you were still... his.' 'And as High Lady?' Cassian loosed a rough breath. 'As High Lady, you are mine. And Azriel's, and Mor's and Amren's. You belong to all of us, and we belong to you. We would not have... put you in so much danger.”

“The flame in her eyes was not of your usual sort, I take it.' Lucien shook his head. 'No. It spoke to nothing in my own arsenal. That was... Ice so cold it burned. Ice and yet... fluid like flame. Or flame made of ice.' 'I think it's death,' I said quietly. I held Rhys's gaze, as if it were again the tether that had kept me in this world. 'I think the power is death- death made flesh. Or whatever power the Cauldron holds over such things. That's why the Carver heard it- heard about her.' 'Mother above,' Lucien said, dragging a hand through his hair. Cassian gave him a solemn nod. But Rhys rubbed his jaw, weighing, thinking. Then he said simply, 'Only Nesta would not just conquer Death- but pillage it.”

“We are the same, you and I,' Amren said. I wasn't sure I was breathing. Through the bond, I wasn't sure Rhys was, either. 'Not in flesh, not in the thing that prowls beneath our skin and bones...' Amren's remarkable eyes narrowed. 'But... I see the kernel, girl.' Amren nodded, more to herself than anyone. 'You did not fit- the mold that they shoved you into. The path you were born upon and forced to walk. You tried, and yet you did not, could not, fit. And then the path changed.' A little nod. 'I know- what it is to be that way. I remember it, long ago as it was.' Nesta had mastered the Fae's preternatural stillness far more quickly than I had. And she sat there for a few heartbeats, simply staring at the strange, delicate female across from her, weighing the words, the power that radiated from Amren... And then Nesta merely said. 'I don't know what you're talking about.' Amren's red lips parted in a wide, serpentine smile. 'When you erupt, girl, make sure it's felt across worlds.”

“I forgot the city around us as he met my eyes, lips hovering over my skin, and murmured, 'We will keep planning for the future, war or no war. I will keep planning for our future.' My throat burned and I nodded. 'We deserve to be happy,' he said, his eyes sparkling enough to tell me what he recalled the words I'd given him on the town house roof after the attack. 'And I will fight with everything I have to ensure it.' 'We will fight,' I said hoarsely. 'Not just you- not anymore.”

“Rhys only peered over his broad shoulder, to the cheerful restaurant behind us. 'That first night we were all here,' he said, and I followed his gaze, watching the workers set the tables with loving precision. 'When you told Sevenda that you felt awake while eating her food...' He shook his head. 'It was the first time you looked... peaceful. Like you were indeed awake, alive again. I was so relieved I thought I'd puke right onto the table.' ... I linked arms with him before saying, 'You and this city helped wake me up- helped bring me back to life.' His eyes flickered as I smiled up at him. 'I will fight with everything I have, too, Rhys. Everything.' He only kissed the top of my head, tugging me closer as we crossed the Sidra under the starry sky.”

“Cassian said, 'You didn't think you were essential. You saved our asses, yes, but... you didn't think you were essential here.' One-two, one-two, one-two. 'I'm not.' He opened his mouth but I charged ahead, speaking around my gasps for breath. 'You all have a... duty- you're all vital. Yes, I have my own abilities, but... You and Azriel were hurt, my sisters were... you know what happened to them. I did what I could to get us out. I'd rather it was me than any of you. I couldn't have lived with the alternative.' His upraised hands were unfaltering as I pummelled them. 'Anything could have happened to you at the Spring Court.' I stopped again. 'If Rhys isn't grilling me with the overprotective bullshit, then I don't see why you-' 'Don't for one moment think that Rhys wasn't beside himself with worry. Oh, he seems collected enough, Feyre, but I know him. And every moment you were gone, he was in a panic. Yes, he knew- we knew- you could handle yourself. But it doesn't stop us from worrying.' I shook out my sore hands, then rubbed my already-aching arms. 'You were mad at him, too.' 'If I hadn't been healing, I would have kicked his ass from one end of Velaris to the other.' I didn't reply. 'We were all terrified for you.' 'I managed just fine.' 'Of course you did. We knew you would. But...' Cassian crossed his arms. 'Rhys pulled the same shit fifty years ago. When he went to that damned party Amarantha threw.' Oh. Oh. 'I'll never forget it, you know,' he said, blowing out a breath. 'The moment when he spoke to us all, mind to mind. When I realised what was happening, and that... he'd saved us. Trapped us here and tied our hands, but...' He scratched at his temple. 'It went quiet- in my head. In a way it hadn't been before. Not since...' Cassian squinted at the cloudless sky. 'Even with utter hell unleashing here, across our territory. I just went... quiet.' He tapped the side of his head with a finger, and frowned. 'After Hybern, the healer kept me asleep while she worked on my wings. So when I woke up two weeks later... that's when I heard. And when Mor told me what happened to you... It went quiet again.' I swallowed against the constriction of my throat. 'You found me when I needed you most, Cassian.' 'Pleased to be of service.' He gave me a grim smile. 'You can rely on us, you know. Both of us. He's inclined to do everything himself- to give everything of himself. He can't stand to let anyone else offer up anything.' That smile faded. 'Neither can you.”

“I came here a great deal in those weeks after Under the Mountain.' My throat tightened as I leaned in to brush a kiss to his cheek. 'Thank you for sharing this place with me.' 'It belongs to you, too, now.' And I knew he meant not just in terms of us being mates, but... in the ways it belonged to the other females here. Who had endured and survived. I gave him a half smile. 'I suppose it's a miracle that I can even stand to be underground.' But his features remained solemn, contemplative. 'It is.' He added softly. 'I'm very proud of you.' My eyes burned, and I blinked as I faced the books. 'And I suppose,' I said with an effort at lightness, 'that it's a miracle I can actually read these things.' Rhys's answering smile was lovely- and just a bit wicked. 'I believe my little lessons helped.' 'Yes, "Rhys is the greatest lover a female can hope for" is undoubtedly how I learned to read.' 'I was only trying to tell you what you now know.”

“Where the hell are you? I scanned around me, and found nothing but shadow and merry flame and books. Two levels below. And why are you two levels below? I shoved out of my chair, back aching in protest as I stormed for the walkway and rail beyond, then peered down into the gloom. Sure enough, in a reading area two levels below, I could spy his dark hair and wings- could spy him leaning back in his chair before an identical desk, an ankle crossed over a knee. Smirking up at me. Because I can't work with you distracting me. I scowled at him. I'm distracting you? If you're sitting next to me, the last thing on my mind is reading dusty old books. Especially when you're in all that tight leather. Pig. His chuckle echoed up through the library amid the fluttering papers and scratching pens of the priestesses working throughout. ... Two hours of work, he promised me, turning back to the table and flaring his wings- a veritable screen to block my view of him. And his view of me. Then we can play. I gave him a vulgar gesture. I saw that. I did it again, and his laugh floated to me as I faced the books stacked before me and began to read.”

“I'm willing to take the brunt of it, if it means the others will at least stand with us against him.' I clenched the tufted arms of the chair. 'You shouldn't have to.' 'It might be the only choice.' 'I don't accept that as an option.' He blinked at me. 'Prythian might need me as an option.' Because with that power of his... He'd take on the king and his entire army. Burn himself out until he was- 'I need you. As an option. In my future.' Silence. And even with the sun warming my feet, a terrible cold spread through me. His throat bobbed. 'If it means giving you a future, then I'm willing to do-' 'You will do no such thing.' I panted through my bared teeth, leaning forward in my chair. Rhys only watched me, eyes shadowed. 'How can you ask me not to give everything I have to ensure that you, that my family and people, survive?' 'You've given enough.' 'Not enough. Not yet.' It was hard to breathe, to see past the burning in my eyes. 'Why? Where does this come from, Rhys?' For once, he didn't answer. And there was something brittle enough in his expression, some long unhealed wound that glimmered there, that I sighed, rubbed my face, and then said. 'Just- work with me. With all of us. Together. This isn't your burden alone.”

“The orb of faelight bobbed ahead, illuminating the stone-hewn cell. Cassian growled at what it revealed. Who it revealed. Wholly different, no doubt, from the same young boy who now smiled at me. Dark-haired, with eyes of crushing blue. I started at the child's face- what I had not noticed that first time. What I had not understood. It was Rhysand's face. The colouring, the eyes... it was my mate's face. But the Carver's full, wide mouth curled into that hideous smile... That was my mouth. My father's mouth. The hair on my arms rose. The Carver inclined his head in greeting- in greeting and in confirmation, as if he knew precisely what I realised. Who I had seen and was still seeing. The High Lord's son. My son. Our son. Should we survive long enough to bear him.”

“A moment later, Nesta was stomping through the front door, her face a remarkable shade of green. 'I need- a toilet.' I met Rhys's stare as he prowled in behind her, hands in his pockets. What did you do? His brows shot up. ... Me? Rhys leaned against the bottom post of the banister. She complained that I was flying deliberately slow. So I went fast. ... Cassian gaped at Rhys, 'What did you do?' 'I asked him the same thing,' I said, crossing my arms. 'He said he "went fast".' Nesta vomited again- then silence. Cassian sighed at the ceiling. 'She'll never fly again.”

“What's at the bottom of the pit?' I asked as Rhys came up beside me, his shoulder brushing mine. 'I once dared Cassian to fly down and see,' Rhys braced his hands on the railing, gazing down into the gloom. 'And?' 'And he came back up, faster than I've ever seen him fly, white as death. He never told me what he saw. The first few weeks, I thought it was a joke- just to pique my curiosity. But when I finally decided to see for myself a a month later, he threatened to tie me to a chair. He said some things were better left unseen and undisturbed. It's been two hundred years, and he still won't tell me what he saw. If you even mention it, he goes pale and shaky and won't talk for a few hours.' My blood chilled. 'Is it... some sort of monster?' 'I have no idea.' Rhys jerked his chin toward Clotho, the priestess patiently waiting a few steps behind us, her face still in shadow. 'They don't speak or write of it, so if they know... They certainly won't tell me. So if it doesn't bother us, then I won't bother it. That is, if it's even an it. Cassian never said if he saw anything living down there. Perhaps it's something else entirely.' Considering the things I'd already witnessed... I didn't want to think about what lay at the bottom of the library. Or what could make Cassian, who had seen more dreadful and deadly parts of the world than I could ever imagine, so terrified.”

“Lucien rubbed his eyes. 'I've seen Rhysand do such... horrible things, seen him play the dark prince over and over. And yet you tell me it was all a lie. A mask. All to protect this place, these people. And I would have laughed at you for believing it, and yet... this city exists. Untouched- or until recently, I suppose. Even the Dawn Court's cities are nothing so lovely as this.' 'Lucien-' 'And you love him. And he- he truly does love you.' Lucien dragged a hand through his red hair. 'And all these people I have spent my centuries hating, even fearing... They are your family.' 'I think Amren would probably deny that she feels any affection for us-' 'Amren is a bedtime story they told us as younglings to make us behave. Amren was who would drink my blood and carry me to hell if I acted out of line. And yet there she was, acting more like a cranky old aunt than anything.' 'We don't- we don't enforce protocol and rank here.' 'Obviously. Rhys lives in a town house, by the Cauldron.' He waved an arm to encompass the city. I didn't know what to say, so I kept silent. 'I hadn't realised I was a villain in your narrative,' Lucien breathed. 'You weren't.' Not entirely.”

“He leaned down, nuzzling my throat. 'Don't you want to comfort your mate, who has missed you terribly these weeks?' I planted a hand on his face and pushed him back, scowling. 'I want my mate to tell me where the hell he was. Then he can get his comfort.' Rhys nipped at my fingers, teeth snapping playfully. 'Cruel, beautiful female.”

“If you want to start convincing your sisters, get them out of the House. Being cooped up never helped anyone.' Rhys said smoothly, 'I'm not entirely sure Velaris is prepared for Nesta Archeron.' 'My sister's not some feral animal,' I snapped. Rhys recoiled a bit, the others suddenly finding the carpet, the divan, the books incredibly fascinating. 'I didn't mean that.' I didn't answer.”

“Break the bond. The bargain, the- the mating bond. He- he made me do it, made me swear it-' 'No,' Rhysand said. I ignored him, even as my heart broke, even as I knew that he hadn't meant to say it- 'Do it,' I begged the king, even as I silently prayed he wouldn't notice his ruined wards, the door I'd left wide open. 'I know you can. Just- free me. Free me from it.' 'No,' Rhysand said. But Tamlin was staring between us. And I looked at thim, the High Lord I had once loved, and I breathed. 'No more. No more death- no more killing.' I sobbed through my clenched teeth. Made myself look at my sisters. 'No more. Take me home and let them go. Tell him it's part of the bargain and let them go. But no more- please.' Cassian slowly, every movement pained, stirred enough to look over a shredded wing at me. And in his pain-glazed eyes, I saw it- the understanding. The Court of Dreams. I had belonged to a court of dreams. And dreamers. And for their dreams... for what they had worked for, sacrificed for... I could do it. Get my sisters out, I said to Rhys one last time, sending it into that stone wall between us. I looked to Tamlin. 'No more.' Those green eyes met mine- and the sorrow and tenderness in them was the most hideous thing I'd ever seen. 'Take me home.' Tamlin said flatly to the king, 'Let them go, break her bond, and let's be done with it. Her sisters come with us. You've already crossed too many lines.' Jurian began objecting, but the king said, 'Very well.' 'No,' was all Rhys said again. Tamlin snarled at him, 'I don't give a shit if she's your mate. I don't give a shit if you think you're entitled to her. She is mine- and one day, I am going to repay every bit of pain she felt, every bit of suffering and despair. One day, perhaps when she decides she wants to end you, I'll be happy to oblige her.' Walk away- just go. Take my sisters with you. Rhys was only staring at me. 'Don't.' But I backed away- until I hit Tamlin's chest, until his hands, warm and heavy, landed on my shoulders. 'Do it,' he said to the king. 'No,' Rhys said again, his voice breaking. But the king pointed at me. And I screamed. Tamlin gripped my arms as I screamed and screamed at the pain that tore through my chest, my left arm. Rhysand was on the ground, roaring, and I thought he might have said my name, might have bellowed it as I thrashed and sobbed. I was being shredded, I was dying, I was dying- No. No, I didn't want it, I didn't want to- A crack sounded in my ears. And the world cleaved in two as the bond snapped.”

“Rhys shut the door and went to a small box on the desk- then silently handed it to me. My heart thundered as I opened the lid. The star sapphire gleamed in the candlelight, as if it were one of the Starfall spirits trapped in stone. 'Your mother's ring?' 'My mother gave me that ring to remind me she was always with me, even during the worst of my training. And when I reached my majority, she took it away. It was an heirloom of her family- had been handed down from female to female over many, many years. My sister wasn't yet born, so she wouldn't have known to give it to her, but... My mother gave it to the Weaver. And then she told me that if I were to marry or mate, then the female would either have to be smart or strong enough to get it back. And if the female wasn't either of those things, then she wouldn't survive the marriage. I promised my mother that any potential bride or mate would have the test... And so it sat there for centuries.' My face heated. 'You said this was something of value-' 'It is. To me, and my family.' 'So my trip to the Weaver-' 'It was vital that we learn if you could detect those objects. But... I picked the object out of pure selfishness.' 'So I won my wedding ring without even being asked if I wanted to marry you.' 'Perhaps.' I cocked my head. 'Do- do you want me to wear it?' 'Only if you want to.' 'When we go to Hybern... Let's say things go badly. Will anyone be able to tell that we're mated? Could they use that against you?' Rage flickered in his eyes. 'If they see us together and can scent us both, they'll know.' 'And if I show up alone, wearing a Night Court wedding ring-' He snarled softly. I closed the box, leaving the ring inside. 'After we nullify the Cauldron, I want to do it all. Get the bond declared, get married, throw a stupid party and invite everyone in Velaris- all of it.' Rhys took the box from my hands and set it down on the nightstand before herding me toward the bed. 'And if I wanted to go one step beyond that?' 'I'm listening,' I purred as he laid me on the sheets.”

“Where is she?' Amren snapped one more time. I couldn't bring myself to say the words. So Mor said them for me as she knelt over Azriel, both of my brothers mercifully unconscious. 'Tamlin offered passage through his lands and our heads on platters to the kings in exchange for trapping Feyre, breaking her bond, and getting to bring her back to the Spring Court. But Ianthe betrayed Tamlin- told the king where to find Feyre's sisters. So the king had Feyre's sisters brought with the queens- to prove he could make immortal. He put them in to the Cauldron. We could do nothing as they were turned. He had us by the balls.' Those quicksilver eyes shot to me. 'Rhysand.' I managed to say, 'We Were out of options, and Feyre knew it. So she pretended to free herself from the control Tamlin thought I'd kept on her mind. Pretended that she... hated us. And told him she'd go home- but only if the killing stopped. If we went free.' 'And the bond,' Amren breathed, Cassian's blood shining on her hands as she slowed its dribbling. Mor said, 'She asked the king to breath the bond. He obliged.' I thought I might be dying- thought my chest might actually be cleaved in two. 'That's impossible,' Amren said. 'That sort of bond cannot be broken.' 'The king said he could do it.' 'The king is a fool,' Amren barked. 'That sort of bond cannot be broken.' 'No, it can't,' I said. They both looked at me. I cleared my head, my shattering heart- breaking for what my mate had done, sacrificed for me and my family. For her sisters. Because she hadn't thought... hadn't thought she was essential. Even after all she had done. 'The king broke the bargain between us. Hard to do, but he couldn't tell that it wasn't the mating bond.' More started. 'Does- does Feyre know-' 'Yes,' I breathed. 'And now my mate is in my enemy's hands.”

“I'll come with you,' I said softly to Tamlin, to Lucien, shifting on his feet, 'if you leave them alone. Let them go.' You do not hold me. Tamlin's face contorted with wrath. 'They're monsters. They're-' He didn't finish as he stalked across the floor to grab me. To drag me out of here, then no doubt winnow away. You do not hold me. The fist gripping my power relaxed. Vanished. Tamlin lunged for me over the few feet that remained. So fast- too fast- I became mist and shadow. I winnowed beyond his reach. The king let out a low laugh as Tamlin stumbled. And went sprawling as Rhysand's fist connected with his face. Panting, I retreated right into Rhysand's arms as one looped around my waist, as Azriel's blood on him soaked into my back. Behind us, Mor leaped in to fill the space Rhys had vacated, slinging Azriel's arm over her shoulders. ... Tamlin rose, wiping the blood now trickling from his nose as he backed to where Lucien held his position with a hand on his sword. But just as Tamlin neared his Emissary, he staggered a step. His face went white with rage. And I knew Tamlin understood a moment before the king laughed. 'I don't believe it. Your bride left you only to find her mate. The Mother has a warped sense of humour, it seems. And what a talent- tell me, girl; how did you unravel that spell?' I ignored him. But the hatred in Tamlin's eyes made my knees buckle. 'I'm sorry,' I said, and meant it. Tamlin's eyes were on Rhysand, his face near-feral. 'You,' he snarled, the sound more animal than Fae. 'What did you do to her?”

“The king jerked his chin at my left arm. 'Break that bond between you two.' 'Please,' I whispered. 'How else is Tamlin to have his bride? He can't very well have a wife who runs off to another male once a month.' Rhys remained silent, though his grip tightened on Azriel. Observing- weighing, sorting through the lock on his power. The thought of that silence between our souls being permanent... My voice cracked as I said to Tamlin, still at the opposite end of the crude half circle we'd formed before the dais. 'Don't. Don't let him. I told you- I told you that I was fine. That I left-' 'You weren't well,' Tamlin snarled. 'He used that bond to manipulate you. Why do you think I was gone so often? I was looking for a way to get you free. And you left.' 'I left because I was going to die in that house.' The King of Hybern clicked his tongue. 'Not what you expected, is it?' Tamlin growled at him, but again held out his hand toward me. 'Come home with me. Now.' 'No.' 'Feyre.' An unflinching command. Rhys was barely breathing- barely moving. And I realised... realised it was to keep his scent from becoming apparent. Our scent. Our mating bond.”

“There were different types of torture, I realised. There was the torture that I had endured, that Rhys had endured. And then there was this. The torture that Rhys had worked so hard those fifty years to avoid; the nightmares that haunted him. To be unable to move, to fight... while our loved ones were broken. My eyes met with those of my mate. Agony rippled in that violet stare- rage and guilt and utter agony. The mirror to my own.”

“Tamlin?' I peered at my hands, the blood, and when I beheld Rhys, when I saw my grim-faced friends, and my drenched, immortal sisters- There was nothing but shock and confusion on Rhys's face as I scrambled back from him. Away from them. Toward Tamlin. 'Tamlin,' I managed to say again. Lucien's eye widened as he stepped between me and Elain. I whirled on the King of Hybern. 'Where-' I again faced Rhysand, 'What did you do to me,' I breathed, low and guttural. Backing toward Tamlin. 'What did you do?' Get them out. Get my sisters out. Play- please play along. Please- There was no sound, no shield, no glimmer of feeling in our bond. The king's power had blocked it out too thoroughly. There was nothing I could do against it, Cursebreaker or no. But Rhys slid his hands into his pockets as he purred, 'How did you get free?' 'What?' Jurian seethed, pushing off the wall and storming toward us. But I turned toward Tamlin and ignored the features and smell and clothes that were all wrong. He watched me warily. 'Don't let him take me again, don't let him- don't-' I couldn't keep the sobs from shuddering out, not as the full force of what I was doing hit me. 'Feyre,' Tamlin said softly. And I knew I had won. I sobbed harder. Get my sisters out, I begged Rhys through the silent bond. I ripped the wards open for you- all of you. Get them out. 'Don't let him take me,' I sobbed again. 'I don't want to go back.' And when I looked at Mor, at the tears streaming down her face as she helped Cassian get upright, I knew she realised what I meant. But the tears vanished- became sorrow for Cassian as she turned a hateful, horrified face to Rhysand and spat, 'What did you do to that girl?' Rhys cocked his head. 'How did you do it, Feyre?' There was so much blood on him. One last game- this was one last game we were to play together.”

“I know better than to tell you to be careful, or to come home. But I want you home. Soon. And I want him dead for putting a hand on you. Even with the entirety of the land between us, his rage rippled down the bond. I answered, my tone soothing, Technically, his magic touched me, not his hand. The bathwater was cold by the time his reply came through. I'm glad you have a sense of humour about this. I certainly don't. I sent back an image of me sticking out my tongue at him. My clothes were back on when his answer arrived. Like mine, it was wordless, a mere image. Like mine, Rhysand's tongue was out. But it was occupied with doing something else.”

“Lucien leaned his head back against the rock wall behind us. 'And then I'll ask your mate how he survived it- knowing you were engaged to someone else. Sharing another male's bed.' I tucked my freezing hands under my arms, gazing toward the gloom ahead. 'Tell me when you knew,' he demanded, his knee pressing into mine. 'That Rhysand was your mate. Tell me when you stopped loving Tamlin and started loving him instead.' I chose not to answer. 'Was it going on before you even left?' I whipped my head to him, even if I could barely make out his features in the dark. 'I never touched Rhysand like that until months later.' 'You kissed Under the Mountain.' 'I had as little choice in that as I did in the dancing.' 'And yet this is the male you now love.' He didn't know- he had no inkling of the personal history, the secrets, that had opened my heart to the High Lord of the Night Court. They were not my stories to tell. 'One would think, Lucien, that you'd be glad I fell in love with my mate, given that you were in the same situation Rhys was in six months ago.”

“Slowly, I turned around, to where the soup was now boiling, and ladled it into a bowl. He watched every step I took to the table, the steaming bowl in my hands. I stopped before him, staring down. And I said, 'You love me?' Rhys nodded. And I wondered if love was too weak a word for what he felt, what he'd done for me. For what I felt for him. I set the bowl down before him. 'Then eat.”

“I think I fell in love with you,' Rhys murmured, stroking a finger down my arm, 'the moment I realised you were cleaving those bones to make a trap for the Middengard Wyrm. Or maybe the moment you flipped me off for mocking you. It reminded me so much of Cassian. For the first time in decades, I wanted to laugh.' 'You fell in love with me,' I said flatly, 'because I reminded you of your friend?' He flicked my nose. 'I fell in love with you, smartass, because you were one of us- because you weren't afraid of me, and you decided to end your spectacular victory by throwing that piece of bone at Amarantha like a javelin. I felt Cassian's spirit beside me in that moment, and could have sworn I heard him say, "if you don't marry her, you stupid prick, I will.”

“Aren't you going to say anything?' he said at last. 'I was going to tell you what I'd decided the moment I saw you on the threshold.' Rhys twisted in his seat toward me. 'And now?' Aware of every breath, every movement, I sat in his lap. HIs hands gently braced my hips as I studied his face. 'And now I want you to know, Rhysand, that I love you. I want you to know...' His lips trembled, and I brushed away the tear that escaped down his cheek. 'I want you to know,' I whispered, 'that I am broken and healing, but every piece of my heart belongs to you. And I am honoured- honoured to be your mate.' His arms wrapped around me and he pressed his forehead to my shoulder, his body shaking. I stroked a hand through his silken hair. 'I love you,' I said again. I hadn't dared say the words in my head. 'And I'd endure every second of it over again so I could find you. And if war comes, we'll face it. Together. I won't let them take me from you. And I won't let them take you from me, either.' Rhys looked up, his face gleaming with tears. He went still as I leaned in, kissing away one tear. Then the other. As he had once kissed away mine. When my lips were wet and salty with them, I pulled back far enough to see his eyes. 'You're mine,' I breathed. His body shuddered with what might have been a sob, but his lips found my own. It was gentle- soft. The kiss he might have given me if we'd been granted time and peace to meet across our two separate worlds. To court each other. I slid my arms around his shoulders, opening my mouth to him, and his tongue slipped in, caressing my own. Mate- my mate.”

“I think I was falling in love with you for a while,' I said, the words barely audible over the trickle of water as I washed his beautiful wings. 'But I knew on Starfall. Or came close to knowing and was so scared of it that I didn't want to look closer. I was a coward.' 'You had perfectly good reasons to avoid it.' 'No, I didn't. Maybe- thanks to Tamlin, yes. But it had nothing to do with you, Rhys. Nothing to do with you. I was never afraid of the consequences of being with you. Even if every assassin in the world hunts us... it's worth it. You are worth it.' His head dipped a bit. And he said hoarsely, 'Thank you.' My heart broke for him then- for the years he'd spent thinking the opposite. I kissed his bare neck, and he reached back to drag a finger down my cheek.”

“He tugged on my wet hair. 'We'll have to find a way to put a damper on that light.' 'I can keep the shadows hidden easily enough.' 'Ah, but you only lose control of those when you're pissed. And since I have every intention of making you as happy as a person can be... I have a feeling we'll need to learn to control that wondrous glow.' 'Always thinking; always calculating.' Rhys kissed the corner of my mouth. 'You have no idea how many things I've thought up when it comes to you.' 'I remember mention of a wall.' His laugh was a sensual promise. 'Next time, Feyre, I'll fuck you against the wall.' 'Hard enough to make the pictures fall off.”

“He was sitting on the roof- in the dark. His great wings were spread behind him, draped over the tiles. I slid into his lap, looping my arms around his neck. He stared at the city around us. 'So few lights. So few lights left tonight.' I did not look. I only traced the lines of his face, then brushed my thumb over his mouth. 'It is not your fault,' I said quietly. His eyes shifted to mine, barely visible in the dark. 'Isn't it? I handed this city over to them. I said I would be willing to risk it, but... I don't know who I hate more: the king, those queens, or myself.' I brushed the hair out of his face. He gripped my hand, halting my fingers. 'You shut me out,' he breathed. 'You- shielded against me. Completely. I couldn't find a way in.' 'I'm sorry.' Rhys let out a bitter laugh. 'Sorry? Be impressed. That shield... What you did to the Attor...' He shook his head. 'You could have been killed.' 'Are you going to scold me for it?' His brow furrowed. Then he buried his face in my shoulder. 'How could I scold you for defending my people? I want to throttle you, yes, for not going back to the town house, but... You chose to fight for them. For Velaris.' He kissed my neck. 'I don't deserve you.' My heart strained. He meant it- truly felt that way. I stroked his hair again. And I said to him, the words the only sound in the silent, dark city, 'We deserve each other. And we deserve to be happy.' Rhys shuddered against me. And when his lips found mine, I let him lay me down upon the roof tiles and make love to me under the stars.”

“I awoke, warm and rested and calm. Safe. Sunlight streamed through the filthy window, illuminating the reds and golds in the wall of wing before me- where it had been all night, shielding me from the cold. Rhysand's arms were banded around me, his breathing deep and even. And I knew it was just as rare for him to sleep that soundly, peacefully. What we'd done last night... Carefully, I twisted to face him, his arms tightening slightly, as if to keep me from vanishing with the morning mist. His eyes were open when I nestled my head against his arm. Within the shelter of the wing, we watched each other. And I realised I might very well be content to do exactly that forever.”

“His head lifted. Pain-filled eyes, bloodless lips. 'You saved me,' he rasped. 'You can explain who they were later.' 'Ambush,' Rhys said anyway, his eyes scanning my face for signs of hurt. 'Hybern soldiers with ancient chains from the king himself, to nullify my power. They must have traced the magic I used yesterday... I'm sorry.' The words tumbled out of him. I brushed back his dark hair. That was why I hadn't been able to use the bond to speak mind to mind. 'Rest,' I said, and moved to retrieve the blanket from my pack. It'd have to do. He gripped my wrist before I could rise. His eyelids lowered. Consciousness ripped from him- too fast. Much too fast and too heavy. 'I was looking for you, too,' Rhys murmured. And passed out.”

“I'd run away. Precisely how Rhys expected me to run- how I'd told him anyone in their right mind would run from him. Like a coward, like a fool, I'd left him injured in the freezing mud. I'd walked away from him- a day after I'd told him he was the only thing I'd never walk away from. I'd demanded honesty, and at the first true test, I hadn't even let him give it to me. I hadn't granted him the consideration of hearing him out. You see me. Well, I'd refused to see him. Maybe I'd refused to see what was right in front of me. I'd walked away. And maybe... maybe I shouldn't have.”