“Proxemics is the study of human use of space and the effects that population density has on behavior, social interaction, and communication. Imagine invisible bubbles around every person that provides each of us with comfort zones for social engagement and interaction.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“In 1966, American anthropologist Edward T. Hall specified four distinct distance zones to describe the perception of physical space around us. Understanding these zones and honoring their invisible boundaries will give you a sixth sense about another person’s “space” as well as your own.
Intimate Zone (less than 2’) —This zone represents our personal space and is reserved for the most trusted and loved people in our lives. Touching, hugging, standing side by side, and engaging in private conversations is common and encouraged. When an interloper violates this personal space, great discomfort and awkwardness can be created. What to do? Take a step back or sideways.
Personal Zone (2’-4’) —This is the distance for interaction with good friends, family, social gatherings, or parties. It's an easy and relaxed space for talking, shaking hands, gesturing, laughing and making faces.
Social Zone (4’-12') —This zone seems to be an appropriate distance for casual friends, colleagues, and acquaintances to interact. It is the comfortable distance we maintain while interacting or addressing large groups of people.
Public Zone (over 12’) —This is the distance we keep from strangers or persons with little acquaintance. It provides the greatest distance between people. This is a safe space that still allows us to experience community and belonging with new people.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As you seek new opportunities to make favorable first impressions, be ever aware of the subtle effect that physical positioning and distance/closeness can have on your interactions with others and use this understanding to your advantage.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As you navigate the various zones with people, a variety of specific physical and psychological responses is elicited from them. Until you know someone, avoid invading his or her personal space. Getting closer gradually demonstrates that you like the other person. This gradual and comfortable approach begins the circle of rapport—he sees that you like him, he likes that you like him, and he reciprocates by liking you back.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As you navigate the various zones with people, a variety of specific physical and psychological responses are elicited from them. Until you know someone, avoid invading his or her personal space. Getting closer gradually demonstrates that you like the other person. This gradual and comfortable approach begins the circle of rapport—he sees that you like him, he likes that you like him, and he reciprocates by liking you back.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“To touch or not to touch . . . that is the question. Handshakes, hugs, and other touching all have their appropriate space and place. The key to success in this area is to know when, where, and how to best put these into action.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“What is acceptable on a personal level is very different from what is acceptable on a business level. When we utilize touch well, we can elevate our presentation, demonstrate respect, and convey confidence. However, when we use touch poorly, it can be disastrous, personally and professionally.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“One simple glance can convey to your recipient that you are . . .
• Present
• Interested
• Paying attention
• Being respectful
• Listening
• Confident
• Engaged
• Caring
• Dedicated
• Appreciative
• Empathetic
• Focused
• Supportive
• Trustworthy
• Acknowledging
• Excited
This list barely scratches the surface; however, it opens the conversation about how vital your eye contact is for making positive first impressions.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Eye Contact Can Reveal if a Person is . . .
• Shy or gregarious
• Honest or deceitful
• Confident or terrified
• Interested or bored
• Patient or irritated
• Sincere or inauthentic
• Organized or Unprepared
• Attentive or distracted”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“There are times when eye contact can move to the dark side and become creepy, hostile, rude, or condescending. When it is overused or made for the wrong reasons, eye contact can make others feel uncomfortable and leave a terrible impression . . .
• obsessive staring
• mocking
• too much intensity
• inappropriate focus
• averting eyes
• obvious contempt
• gawking, ogling
• casting the "evil eye"
• over-watching
• intimidating
• unwelcome looks
• rolling the eyes”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“A genuine smile is your best fashion accessory and the most important thing you can wear.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Mirroring and matching works at the sub-conscious level and serves to make the other person feel more “comfortable” and connected to you. These subliminal actions can create a subconscious feeling of unison and connection that demonstrate how much you have in common.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Your eyes are the windows to your soul” indeed. It is a cliché for a good reason—it is a timeless truth with universal application.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Meaningful eye contact has the power to transcend time and space to connect us with others and can be one of the most gracious and important ways to demonstrate attention and respect.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“When you make eye contact with another person, you can send thousands of silent messages without even speaking a word. No wonder eye contact can be both a direct form of communication and an elusive attribute at the same time.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Whether it is in a sales situation, love at first sight, a husband and wife having an important conversation, a parent disciplining a child, or a teacher instructing her students, eye contact is a powerful body language for enriching engagement, focus, and communication.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Being culturally aware and respectful of others’ cultures will help you to keep the habit of making eye contact in context. As a matter of fact, in some parts of the world making eye contact can be construed as being exactly the opposite of what I am sharing in these pages. Making a great first impression is always about the specific environment and circumstance, isn’t it?”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“We've all been in the middle of a conversation and the person with whom we are speaking breaks eye contact, appears distracted, glazes over, or looks elsewhere. Their simple eye movement can quickly break down communications by making us feel ignored, dismissed, or rejected. For some, it may be accidental and unintentional, while for others, avoiding eye contact is on purpose.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“12 Reasons Why People Avoid Eye Contact
1. They do not want to reveal their feelings.
2. They are not being honest and truthful.
3. It makes them feel vulnerable and exposed.
4. They are being rude or indifferent.
5. They are ashamed or embarrassed to talk about something.
6. They are nervous or lacking confidence.
7. It makes them feel very uncomfortable.
8. They are arrogant, snobby, and pretentious.
9. They are afraid of saying the wrong thing or looking stupid.
10. They are shy or introverted.
11. They are accessing internal thoughts or emotions to process and contemplate information.
12. Or as mentioned before, and important to remember, it may simply be a cultural value or behavior.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As with most things in life, a healthy balance will keep us on the right path. To avoid too much eye contact or too little, seek to create a comfortable mix. It is generally encouraged to use more eye contact when you are listening and less when you are speaking.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“When speakers make eye contact with an audience, they will be perceived as being more prepared, more competent, confident, and trustworthy. Eye contact helps to relax the speaker and reminds them that their audience is made up of separate individuals who perceive things differently. Audience response is clearly seen in the expressions of their eyes.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“7 Ways to Improve Eye Contact at any Time
1. Relax into the moment by smiling.
2. Practice making eye contact with people you trust, so that when you are with strangers, it is easier to form a connection.
3. When you feel uncomfortable, begin by looking at their mouth or forehead.
4. Lean in and show that you are interested and attentive.
5. Put a little space between you and the other person.
6. Remember that the other person may be feeling just as awkward.
7. Don’t give them a blank stare throughout a conversation. Rather, practice gazing down or to the side every few moments so that you appear relaxed.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Becoming aware of what you are doing and how others perceive you will provide you with instant insight for making changes where necessary.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Whatever you are putting out into the universe is going to be returned unto you and have a direct correlation to what you are getting back. In many ways, you are a magnet and manifest accordingly.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Think of your personal and professional life—are you attracting what you want? Are you attracting the kind of people you like? Do you feel that life is working for you or against you? How have others been treating you? Are you pleased with your results?”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Modeling for others a sincerely positive and encouraging countenance will not only enrich their lives, it can foster trust and appreciation for you. This subtle technique of mirroring can help others feel compatibility with you and lead them to feel better about themselves. A win for everybody!”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“5 Tips for Mirroring Others
1. Body language. When they smile, you smile. When they lean back in their chair, you lean back in your chair. When they cross their legs or fold their arms, you do the same.
2. Vocabulary or specific words. Notice their language and the words they choose and use—their keywords, expressions, expletives, or phrases.
3. Communication style. People receive, process, and deliver information in different ways. Notice whether someone is results driven or relaxed, emotional or pragmatic, talkative or observant. Recognizing their style will enable you to adapt your style to theirs to build rapport and improve communication.
4. Vocal style.
a. Speech rate—If they are talking fast, you talk fast. If they are talking slowly, you talk slowly. Consider rhythm, pace, and tempo.
b. Volume—If they are speaking quietly and softly, match their volume.
c. Tone—Mirror their emotion, tone, and pitch. You can even seek to mirror their grammar and dialect, as long as it is discreet and respectful.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As we explore this valuable non-verbal language, please note that these principles do not apply in many cultures around the world. In some cultures, direct eye contact may offend, affront, violate, or threaten.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Have you heard that a smile is the shortest distance between people? I love that! There is nothing like a genuine smile to create a first impression with positive impact.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“A genuine smile is inviting, contagious, encouraging, and brings joy into the world. It instantly tells others that you are glad to see them, that they are important and you are approachable.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Accompanied with good eye contact, a smile serves as an immediate icebreaker to warm up relations and turn a stranger into a friend.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Smiling is truly one of the most generous gifts you can give to another. You never know when your smile may inspire the sad, encourage the hopeless, heal a heart, or change someone's world for the better.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Smiling reduces blood pressure by lowering the stress-inducing hormones, such as adrenaline and cortisol. As my mother, who is now in her eighties, navigates the challenges of aging, her mantra has become, “Keep moving and keep smiling.” She has observed the rapid decline of her friends who haven’t. She is striving to stay strong, happy, and vital; her desire to smile is helping her to live a healthier, more satisfying, and longer life.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Research has shown that smiling releases endorphins—the happy hormones that shift your physiology for improved well-being. When you smile and your eyes crinkle, your body releases chemicals that change the chemistry of your brain, lifting spirits, and reducing pain. Even when it is hard to smile and you are forcing it, positive changes take place in your physiology.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As the saying goes, "Smile and the world smiles with you, cry and you cry alone.” Smiling is a universal symbol of happiness that transcends language and communication challenges.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“A smile is one of the most powerful and important body language cues we share with others—and as such a heartfelt emotion, it's impossible to express its effect on others in words.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“No matter your age, a smile makes you look and feel better. People spend billions of dollars every year to get pumped, pulled, tucked, and tweaked in hopes of being more beautiful. But there is nothing like a genuine smile to transform your appearance and provide an instant facelift.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Approachable people . . .
1. Use body language to their advantage.
2. Are open-minded to new people and new experiences.
3. Encourage others to feel better about themselves.
4. Are willing to be told not what they want to hear, but what they need to hear.
5. Provide an inviting aura that is warm and comforting.
6. Realize that authenticity and transparency earn trust.
7. Intuitively tune into the feelings and needs of others.
8. Are emotionally steady and respond appropriately when they sense awkwardness or discomfort in others.
9. Radiate happiness and curbs cynicism.
10. Provide a safe environment for others to express themselves.
11. Make others feel valued and appreciated.
12. Listen and consider other people’s viewpoints and opinions.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Expect good things from people; they feel it. You never know who you are going to meet, and projecting approachability will open doors of opportunity for you that you may not have discovered otherwise.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Consider how others may feel about you before, during, and after talking. Are you projecting an attitude that results in others feeling accepted and welcome? Are you encouraging people to speak and engage with you through your approachability?”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“An Unapproachable person may be exhibiting behaviors which are . . .
• Tense and prickly.
• Remote and preoccupied.
• Cold and distant.
• Withholding of acknowledgement or response.
• Apathetic and disconnected.
• Preoccupied and distracted.
• Intimidating.
• Snobbish or cliquish.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“We are comforted when a person, place, or business is warm and inviting. Making us feel this way increases the likelihood that we will want to learn more, do business with them, or pursue a meaningful interaction.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“The consistency of their moods and emotions creates a predictable and consistent outcome that can be reassuring in our turbulent times. You know you can depend on approachable people to be well balanced, accepting, and empathetic to the needs and feelings of others.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Approachable people are “straight-up.” It is comforting to know exactly what to expect when you see them. What you see is what you get!”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Being a keen observer, I would think to myself, who is approachable? Who is someone I'd like to know? Who is putting out welcoming vibes?”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Having moved from Florida to Wisconsin, it has been an interesting exercise for me to attend networking events where I did not know a soul. I would silently scan the room to see who was approachable and who was not. It was those individuals who put out the approachable vibes whom I would be magnetized toward to engage in conversation.”
“Are you being approachable when you are around new people? Ever not know what to say? Simply smile when you make eye contact. This is a subliminal invitation to help others feel safe—allowing a conversation to follow naturally.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“As humans, we are all insecure to a certain degree, and we don't want to risk looking stupid, being rejected, or feeling awkward.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“An approachable person intuitively knows how to set new acquaintances at ease and create a safety net for them to be vulnerable and authentic.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact
“Welcome" is a word to use often! Leaders who maintain an open-door policy inspire trust, teamwork, and healthier communication. They are more likely to earn respect, gain buy-in, and foster collaboration.”
Source: The Art of Body Language: 8 Ways to Optimize Non-Verbal Communication for Positive Impact