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Quote by Johnny Carson

“Happiness is seeing the muscular lifeguard all the girls were admiring leave the beach hand in hand with another muscular lifeguard.”

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Johnny Carson

Johnny Carson was an American television host, comedian, and producer. He is best known for hosting 'The Tonight Show Starring Johnny Carson' for 30 years, from 1962 to 1992. His innovative and witty interviews, along with his relaxed and conversational style, made him one of the most beloved and influential figures in American television history. more

“There is some good news for John McCain. According to the latest polls, which came out today, John McCain has started to open up a lead over Barack Obama. This is true. Yeah. The USA Today poll has McCain ahead by ten points. The 'CBS News' poll has the two tied. And the MSNBC poll says that Obama won the election last week.”

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Author:Conan O'Brien

“All the major networks declared Barack Obama the winner at 11 last night, except for MSNBC, which declared Obama the winner six months ago.”

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Author:Conan O'Brien

“People all over the world now are following our election. And according to a new international poll that just came out, I think this came out a few hours ago, this is true, people in Canada want Barack Obama to be the next U.S. president. That's what they're saying. In Canada, yeah. That makes sense, because Obama has the support of Canada's anti-war voters, as well as Canada's black guy. He is very excited.”

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Author:Conan O'Brien

“The big story today, Barack Obama was accused of insulting Sarah Palin when he criticized Republican policies by saying, you can put lipstick on a pig, but it's still a pig. Political experts say that if Obama keeps insulting Palin, he could lose the election and win a job at MSNBC.”

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Author:Conan O'Brien

Quote by Johnny Carson

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