Home / Quotes / Quote by Frankie Boyle

Quote by Frankie Boyle

“I did Scottish footballer of the year this year, attempted to do some comedy at that. Not the brightest people in the world. There were seven O-Levels in that room, and they were all mine.”

Quote by Frankie Boyle

Author

Frankie Boyle is a British comedian, writer, and television presenter known for his satirical and sharp political humor. He is recognized for his unique sense of humor and insightful commentary on social and political issues. more

You May Also Like

“I like storms. I like thunder and lightning. What I do during a storm is shag my girlfriend and pretend that we're taking part in the conception of the Antichrist.”

Humor Funny Storm Girlfriend Conception Lightning Thunder My Girlfriend Antichrist Thunder And Lightning

Author:Frankie Boyle

“RyanAir have been getting a hard time because they've launched a £7 flight to New York. Although as always with RyanAir it does land slightly outside of New York. In Dublin.”

Doe Has Beens Hard Humor Funny Land New York Flight Hard Times Dublin

Author:Frankie Boyle

“The average life expectancy rate in some parts of Glasgow is 54. If you've ever been there, you'll realize that that's maybe a bit long.”

Ifs Long Humor Funny Bits Realizing Rate Average Expectancy Glasgow Life Expectancy Average Life

Author:Frankie Boyle

“They've bought out a condom now for people with premature ejaculation and they've put an anesthetic in the lining that makes you numb and you can last for longer. Or, you can wear it inside out and you don't have to wake anybody up!”

People Humor Funny Lasts Numb Premature Condom Anesthetics Ejaculation Premature Ejaculation

Author:Frankie Boyle

“Victoria Beckham looks like she has a dump once every four years. That's probably how David knows that there's a World Cup coming up.”

Knows World Years Looks Humor Funny Four Cups Four Years Dump World Cup Victoria Beckham

Author:Frankie Boyle

“I watched the footage of Saddam being executed, and it really made me think...is there nothing on the internet that I won't masturbate to?”

Thinking Made Humor Funny Internet Saddam

Author:Frankie Boyle

“My dad is one of the funniest people I know. He's the sort of man who can make you laugh just by reading out of a telephone directory... He's a spastic.”

People Knows Men Humor Funny Reading Laughing Dad My Dad Telephones Make You Laugh

Author:Frankie Boyle

“I can't help thinking the failed New York bomber would've done far more damage if he'd simply driven throught Times Square in a Toyota.”

Ifs Thinking I Can Done Helping Humor Funny New York Driven Damage Squares Bombers Toyota Times Square

Author:Frankie Boyle

“The government are considering spending £3million on a state funeral for Margaret Thatcher when she dies. For £3million they could buy everyone in Scotland a shovel, and we'll dig a hole deep enough to deliver her to Satan ourselves.”

States Enough Humor Government Funny Dies Spending Holes Satan Funeral Considering Scotland Shovels

Author:Frankie Boyle

“A 66-YEAR-OLD woman has become the oldest new mum in Britain after giving birth to a baby boy. I'm amazed she needed to have a caesarean section though, you'd think at 66 she would have needed some masking tape down there just to stop it falling out.”

Thinking Giving Years Humor Funny Fall Boys Baby Birth Needed Britain Tape Mum Amazed Sections Old Woman Giving Birth Baby Boy

Author:Frankie Boyle