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Quote by Chelsea Handler

“My feeling is, if a dog is that hard up to break free, let it go. It's like a boyfriend who wants to break up. We all know the old adage "If you set someone free, and he never comes back, then he was never yours." I understand the main fear with setting dogs loose is they could get hit by a car, but so could an ex boyfriend. That's just a chance you have to take.”

Book:Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

Work

Are You There, Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea

This memoir delves into the personal experiences of the author, chronicling their struggles with alcoholism and the path to sobriety. The narrative is filled with wit and self-deprecating humor, offering a raw and honest look at the challenges faced during the process of overcoming addiction. more

Author

Chelsea Handler

Chelsea Handler, born on February 25, 1975, is a renowned American comedian, writer, and television host. Known for her unique sense of humor and candid remarks, she has hosted several popular television shows and achieved significant success in the comedy industry. more

“Valerie was crying, too. She was laughing and sniffling back sobs. “I’m going to marry my snuggy wuggums,” she said. Morelli paused, his fork halfway to the roast chicken platter. He slid his eyes to me and leaned close. “If you ever call me snuggy wuggums in public I’ll lock you in the cellar and chain you to the furnace.”

Ifs Said Eye Laughing Cry Chains His Eyes Call Me Chickens Locks Halfway Forks Cellars Furnaces Roast Chicken

Book:Ten Big Ones: A Stephanie Plum Novel

Source: Ten Big Ones: A Stephanie Plum Novel

“There’s always tomorrow.” “Exactly,” she said, finishing off her first doughnut, selecting a second. Maybe she wouldn’t starve to death, she decided. Maybe she’d eat herself into obesity and explode. Death by doughnut.”

Firsts Said Tomorrow Decided Finishing Obesity Doughnut

Book:Naughty Neighbor

Source: Naughty Neighbor

“They reached the carriage house. When she turned the knob, he got all critical again. “Why isn’t this door locked?” “It’s Parrish. There’s not much point.” “We have crime here, just as any other place does. Keep this door locked from now on.” “Like that’s going to stop you. All you’d have to do is give it one good kick, and – “ “Not from me, you ninny!” “I hate to be the one to break the bad news, but if they find my body, you’re the one with the biggest grudge.” “It’s impossible to hold a rational conversation with you.”

Ifs Giving Doe Body Hate House Break Impossible Doors Crime Conversation News I Hate Critical Rational Kicks Locked Bad News Grudge Carriages Knobs

Author:Susan Elizabeth Phillips

“The kitchen was bright, cheerful yellow, the walls decorated with framed chalk and pencil sketches Simon and Rebecca had done in grade school. Rebecca had some drawing talent, you could tell, but Simon's sketches of people all looked like parking meters with tufts of hair.”

Source: Cassandra Clare: The Mortal Instruments Series (5 books): City of Bones; City of Ashes; City of Glass; City of Fallen Angels, City of Lost Souls

“Shirley's gonna be pissed," Gazarra said. "She hates when I get shot." To my recollection, the only other time Gazarra was shot was when he was playing quick draw in the police station elevator and his gun accidentally discharged. The bullet ricocheted off the elevator wall and lodged in Gazarra's right buttock.”

Said Hate Wall Draws Gun Shots Police Stations Bullets Recollection Elevators Buttocks

Book:Ten Big Ones: A Stephanie Plum Novel

Source: Ten Big Ones: A Stephanie Plum Novel

“You're not looking for a partner," Ranger said. "You're looking for an enforcer. You hate to run. You must be worried about getting into that black dress. What did you eat just now? Piece of cake? Candy bar?" "Everything," I said. "I just ate everything.”

Said Running Hate Black Pieces Dresses Partners Bars Worried Cake Candy Rangers Candy Bar

Book:High Five

Source: High Five

“Hello, hello.” Magnus swept toward them..."Alec, my darling, Clary. And rat-boy." He swept a bow toward Simon, who looked annoyed. "To what do I owe the pleasure?" "We came to see Jace," Clary said. "Is he all right?" "I don’t know," Magnus said. "Does he normally just lie on the floor like that without moving?" "What –," Alec began, and broke off as Magnus laughed. "That’s not funny." "You’re so easy to tease. And yes, your friend is just fine. Well, except that he keeps putting all my things away and trying to clean up. Now I can’t find anything. He’s compulsive.”