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Quote by Gilbert Gottfried

“In real life I'm a tall, blond Christian.”

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Gilbert Gottfried is an American comedian known for his unique humor style and mimicry skills. Born on February 28, 1955, he has achieved success in various comedy fields since the 1970s. more

“I was Jewish, through and through, although in our house that didn't mean a whole lot. We never went to synagogue. I never had a Bar Mitzvah. We didn't keep kosher or observe the Sabbath. In fact, I'm not so sure I would have known what the Sabbath looked like if it passed me on the street, so how could I observe it?”

Ifs Mean Whole Facts House Known Streets Bars Sabbath Synagogue Bar Mitzvah Mitzvah Kosher

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“I'm a Cancerian, the typical crab with the tough outer shell and the soft bit in the middle. I don't think I'll ever come to terms with people being unnecessarily nasty, but I can take it if someone doesn't like my music - I'm not everyone's cup of tea.”

People Ifs Thinking I Can Bits Term Middle Tough Cups Tea Shells Nasty Typical Cups Of Tea Crabs

Author:Katherine Jenkins

“Some comedians tell nice jokes that you can tell to your kids. Some use bad words - they work 'blue.' If you don't want to hear a joke that's blue, you shouldn't go to a comedy club where a comedian who makes blue jokes is performing.”

Ifs Want Use Kids Comedy Nice Jokes Blue Clubs Comedian Performing Bad Word Comedy Clubs

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“The 'Phoenix Sun' did a list of the unsexiest men in the world, and I made it to number one. I beat out Bin Laden. He's a terrorist, hasn't bathed in months. I beat him out. To me it was a great honor.”

Men World Made Numbers Sun Months Honor Beats Lists Terrorist Made It Bin Laden Phoenix

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“Every time I give a straight answer and read it in a magazine, I say, 'Ouch.' One day I'd like to talk to a psychoanalyst about why celebrities reveal so much of themselves in interviews.”

Giving Answers One Day Magazines Interviews Ouch

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“I find Washington audiences are basically the same as every other audience; they watch me and go, 'Who's idea was it to go see him? And is it too late to ask for my money back?'”

Ideas Asks Watches Audience Late Too Late Watch Me

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“I'm terrible when I have to fill up free time. My days, if I'm not working, I wake up and figure out a way to kill time until it's time to go to sleep.”

Ifs Way Sleep Figures Terrible Wake Up Going To Sleep Free Time

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

“If you're a lead actor, people are just waiting to say 'you're too old' or 'you're too unhip.' If you're a supporting actor, you can just work forever.”

People Ifs Actors Waiting Forever Supporting Actors

Author:Gilbert Gottfried

Quote by Gilbert Gottfried

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