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Quote by Jay Leno

“According to a British poll, you've only got a one in five chance of achieving your childhood career ambition. Which probably explains why you don't run into that many cowboys, princesses, or space rangers.”

Quote by Jay Leno

Author

Jay Leno (born April 28, 1950) is an American comedian, television host, writer, and car enthusiast. He is best known for hosting NBC's The Tonight Show from 1992 to 2009, and again from 2010 to 2014. Known for his gentle humor, observational comedy, and distinctive chin, Leno became a household name in late-night television. Beyond comedy, he is a passionate car collector with a vast collection of vehicles. He also engages in philanthropy, supporting education, healthcare, and veteran causes. Leno's career spans decades, and he is regarded as one of the most successful talk show hosts in American history. more

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“There are now more obese people in the United States than there are overweight people. I think it's safe to say that after all these years, Diet Coke is a complete failure.”

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“There are 249 millionaires in Congress. Remember a couple of years ago when this new Congress told us they had the solution to the recession? Apparently, they didn't share it with the rest of us.”

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“A new study published by The British Medical Journal found that inactivity can kill you. I mean, these are the kind of findings that just scare the hell out of Congress.”

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“Researchers found a frog in new guinea that is so tiny, they believe it's the smallest vertebrate on the planet. It has the tiniest backbone of any living creature, except members of Congress.”

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“According to the L.A. Times, Attorney General John Ashcroft wants to take "a harder stance" on the death penalty. What's a harder stance on the death penalty? We're already killing the guy? How do you take a harder stance on the death penalty? What, are you going to tickle him first? Give him itching powder? Put a thumbtack on the electric chair?”

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“The entire spring and summer line from Marc Jacobs was stolen on the way to the fashion show in Paris. The thief is considered armed and fabulous.”

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“The NFL draft is going to be this Thursday. That's a huge night for college players. That's the night they start being paid over the table.”

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“In the NFL, 31 players have been arrested just since the Super Bowl. In fact, a lot of teams are switching to the no-huddle offense because players aren't allowed to associate with known felons.”

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“The Supreme Court has ruled that anybody can be strip-searched for any kind of arrest. That's something to think about the next time you bring 12 items into a 10-item-or-less lane.”

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