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Quote by Melody Beattie

“Once they have been affected---once "it" sets in---codependency takes on a life of its own. It is similar to catching pneumonia or picking up a destructive habit. Once you've got it, you've got it. If you want to get rid of it, YOU have to do something to make it go away. It doesn't matter whose fault it is. Your codependency becomes your problem; solving your problems is your responsibility.”

Quote by Melody Beattie

Book:Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself
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Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself

This book provides insights and practical advice for individuals struggling with codependent relationships, focusing on self-care and breaking free from controlling behaviors. more

Author

Melody Beattie
Melody Beattie

Melody Beattie is an American author known for her books on personal growth and self-help. Born in 1948, her works delve into themes such as codependency, self-acceptance, and emotional independence, offering profound insights and practical tools for readers. more

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“Lately, he had been wondering if codependence was such a bad thing. He took pleasure in his friendships, and it didn’t hurt anyone, so who cared if it was codependent or not? And anyway, how was a friendship any more codependent than a relationship? Why was it admirable when you were twenty-seven but creepy when you were thirty-seven? Why wasn’t friendship as good as a relationship? Why wasn’t it even better? It was two people who remained together, day after day, bound not by sex or physical attraction or money or children or property, but only by the shared agreement to keep going, the mutual dedication to a union that could never be codified. Friendship was witnessing another’s slow drip of miseries, and long bouts of boredom, and occasional triumphs. It was feeling honoured by the privilege of getting to be present for another person’s most dismal moments, and knowing that you could be dismal around him in return.”

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“It is only when we feel deprived that we resent giving to others. Self-care does not mean you stop caring about others; it just means you start caring more about you. Start thinking about yourself more and others less. Since you have a choice between taking care of someone else, or giving to yourself, try choosing yourself sometimes.”

ResentmentSelf CareCodependencyHealing InsightsResentfulRecovery From AbuseCodependenceResentment QuotesCo Dependence
Book:The Right to Innocence: Healing the Trauma of Childhood Sexual Abuse: A Therapeutic 7-Step Self-Help Program for Men and Women, Including How to Choose a Therapist and Find a Support Group
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“The Karpman drama triangle is a classic model of codependent behaviour. First of all, a codependent will rescue someone. Then, when their ‘brave and charitable’ work hasn’t been acknowledged, they become very angry at the person they have attempted to rescue. And finally, they start to feel like a victim. They feel sorry for themselves and complain how the person they rescued never appreciated them. The important thing to learn here is that if a person wants to change, it’s because they have made a decision to do so.”

AddictionAddiction And RecoveryAddictive BehaviourAddictivenessCodependenceDrama TriangleThe Karpman Drama Triangle
Book:The Kindness Habit: Transforming our Relationship to Addictive Behaviours
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“Any discussion of male codependency, even one rooted in early attachment dis-ruption, must address the pressures of the social-norm context for male devel-opment. These pressures are often referred to in the literature as “gender role strain.” Gender role strain in men has been identified as either the failure to fulfill male role expectations or the traumatic fulfillment of these expectations, and their negative consequences. One proposed cause of gender role strain is the early gender role socialization process which begins within the family context and is supported by a larger cultural socialization based on patriarchy.”

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Book:Codependency & Men
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