Quotessence
Home / Topics / Recovery From Abuse Quotes

Recovery From Abuse Quotes

Browse 47 quotes about Recovery From Abuse.

Recovery From Abuse Quotes

“Your voice is yours, even if others try to steal it and replace it with their own. Your truth is yours, even if others try to twist it into gnarled lies. Your worth is yours, too, even if others try to teach you that it depends on them. Your power is yours, even when others try to hold it in their hands. Don't be fooled. Claim your own voice, your own truth, your own worth, your own power.”

StrengthSelf HelpSelf LoveEmpowermentSelf AwarenessSelf WorthNarcissistic AbuseRecovery From Abuse
Author:Jennifer DeLucy
Create image

“As we move away from the old role in which we were helplessly entrapped as a victim, we make friends with the people who affirm us. Their enthusiasm about us mirrors the positive experience we are having.”

HealingFriendsEmpowermentVictimRecoveryMoving OnSurvivorFriendshipsAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsAffirmingHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseVictim RoleThriver
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“When shame is met with compassion and not received as confirmation of our guilt, we can begin to see how slant a lens it has had us looking through. That awareness lets us step back far enough to see that if we can let it go, we will see ourselves as clean where we once thought we were dirty. We will remember our innocence. We will see how our shame supported a system in which the perpetrators were protected and we bore the brunt of their offense — first in its actuality, then again in carrying their shame for it. If the method we chose to try to beat out shame was perfectionism, we can relax now, shake the burden off our shoulders, and give ourselves a chance to loosen up and make some errors. Hallelujah! Our freedom will not come from tireless effort and getting it all exactly right.”

FreedomHealingShameGuiltRecoveryInnocenceImperfectOffenseSexual AbusePerfectionismChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsAbusersPerpetratorsChild RapeHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseAbuserInnocence LostPerfectly ImperfectBurdens Of The PastFalse GuiltPeptrator
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“The stovetop was as hot as the sweltering summer day. Mom slowly stirred her bubbling stew made from the old family recipe Of generations past. With one cup each of abandonment, alcoholism, shame, and rage, she served me up a hefty, foul portion. I swallowed it all like mom told me to but was left with only hunger--for compassion, safety, nourishment, and love.”

InspirationalWomenAbuse SurvivorsGrief And HealingRecovery From Abuse
Book:First, I Believe You: A True Story of Healing from Hidden Memories of Severe Childhood Trauma
Create image

“What makes a successful relationship? . . . Research shows that when a partner dominates another through the abuse of power, it is a prime deterrent to a successful relationship (Greenberg and Goldman 2008). When a controlling partner uses coercive tactics to overpower you, it is a setup for the relationship to fail - without exception. Research about marital relationships in general reveals that husbands are likely to receive more support from their spouse and this fair far better, while women tend to receive less support and experience greater stress from giving support. These are among the conditions that contribute to the higher rates of depression in women.”

MarriageRelationshipAbuseRecoveryEmotional AbusePhysical AbuseRecovery From AbuseSuccessful Relationship
Book:Women with Controlling Partners: Taking Back Your Life from a Manipulative or Abusive Partner
Create image

“Traumatic events destroy the sustaining bonds between individual and community. Those who have survived learn that their sense of self, of worth, of humanity, depends upon a feeling of connection with others. The solidarity of a group provides the strongest protection against terror and despair, and the strongest antidote to traumatic experience. Trauma isolates; the group re-creates a sense of belonging. Trauma shames and stigmatizes; the group bears witness and affirms. Trauma degrades the victim; the group exalts her. Trauma dehumanizes the victim; the group restores her humanity. Repeatedly in the testimony of survivors there comes a moment when a sense of connection is restored by another person’s unaffected display of generosity. Something in herself that the victim believes to be irretrievably destroyed---faith, decency, courage---is reawakened by an example of common altruism. Mirrored in the actions of others, the survivor recognizes and reclaims a lost part of herself. At that moment, the survivor begins to rejoin the human commonality...”

FaithHumanityCommunityHealingCourageSocietyAbuseVictimAffectionRecoveryGenerosityConnectionBelongingSurvivorIsolatedRejectedAltruismPtsdDecencyAbuse SurvivorsOutcastInhumanSurvivorsBondingInhumanityBondHealing InsightsTraumatic ExperiencesBondsTraumatizedDehumanizationInhumaneRecovery From AbuseHealing AbuseConnection With PeopleDehumanisationLoss Of SelfVictimizedNo Longer HumanDehumanizeDehumanizedInhumane TreatmentFeeling HumanLoss Of Social InteractionReclaiming DignityReclaiming Your Life
Book:Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Create image

“In the grief that comes with recognizing what happened to us, we often feel there is nowhere to turn for solace…We do things to keep it away, such as becoming overly busy or using drugs or alcohol to numb our feelings. When we are caught up in resistance, we do not feel hope, but when we surrender to our sadness fully, hope trickles in.”

HopeGriefHealingAddictionAlcoholGrievingDrugsAvoidanceHealing InsightsWorkaholicOverworkHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseHealing AbuseAvoiding PainWorkaholismKeeping BusyNumbing Emotions
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Because we were treated neglectfully and abusively in our young years—when we most needed self-love to be mirrored—it was difficult to hold onto…We take up the challenge of learning to love ourselves, through our highs & our lows, when we are finding acceptance from others and when we are being closed out and rejected.”

HealingSelf LoveNeglectSelf AcceptanceLove YourselfChild AbuseEmotional AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSelf Love QuotesHealing InsightsHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseChild Abuse SurvivorsEmotional NeglectChild Neglect
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Denial protected us, screening out certain experiences & feelings until we grew strong enough to relate to them...Yet it also dropped a curtain over our experience, obscuring it, leaving us with a sense of missing pieces. For instance, when we achieved something, we felt like an imposter. Or, though we had a relationship with a significant other, we often felt alone and unrelated to anyone.”

ConfusionDenialDetachmentAlonenessAbuse SurvivorsHealing InsightsRelationship ProblemsRecovery From AbuseIntimacy QuotesEmotional Detachment
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“First, the physiological symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder have been brought within manageable limits. Second, the person is able to bear the feelings associated with traumatic memories. Third, the person has authority over her memories; she can elect both to remember the trauma and to put memory aside. Fourth, the memory of the traumatic event is a coherent narrative, linked with feeling. Fifth, the person's damaged self-esteem has been restored. Sixth, the person's important relationships have been reestablished. Seventh and finally, the person has reconstructed a coherent system of meaning and belief that encompasses the story of trauma.”

HealingTraumaRecoveryTherapyPtsdPsychotherapyHealing ProcessPost Traumatic Stress DisorderComplex PtsdRecovery From AbuseHealing AbusePosttraumatic Stress DisorderTraumatic StressTrauma Therapy
Book:Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Create image

“In situations of captivity the perpetrator becomes the most powerful person in the life of the victim, and the psychology of the victim is shaped by the actions and beliefs of the perpetrator.”

HealingAbuseVictimTraumaPrisonerPowerlessPtsdDomestic ViolenceAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsPowerlessnessCaptivityHealing InsightsBelief SystemComplex PtsdHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseAbuserCore BeliefsStockholm SyndromeTraumatic StressIntimate Partner ViolencePerpetratorBelie
Book:Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Create image

“Our need to be "greater than" or "less than" has been a defense against toxic shame. A shameful act was committed upon us. The perpetrator walked away, leaving us with the shame. We absorbed the notion that we are somehow defective. To cover for this we constructed a false self, a masked self. And it is this self that is the overachiever or the dunce, the tramp or the puritan, the powermonger or the pathetic loser.”

HealingShameAshamedSurvivorLoserTrue SelfChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsPuritanIncestDefectiveHealing InsightsFeeling BadChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorRecovery From AbuseOverachieverCoverupToxic ShameFalse SelfPower TripHidden PainDunceDefective HumansHidden FeelingsHidden Self
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Many of us learned that keeping busy…kept us at a distance from our feelings...Some of us took the ways we busied ourselves—becoming overachievers & workaholics—as self esteem…But whenever our inner feeling did not match our outer surface, we were doing ourselves a disservice…If stopping to rest meant being barraged with this discrepancy, no wonder we were reluctant to cease our obsessive activity.”

RecoveryAvoidanceOvercomer QuotesAbuse SurvivorsHealing InsightsWorkaholicOverworkCoping MechanismsCoping MechanismRecovery From AbuseAvoiding PainObsessionsOverachievementWorkaholismCoping SkillsKeeping BusyOverachievers
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“It is only when we feel deprived that we resent giving to others. Self-care does not mean you stop caring about others; it just means you start caring more about you. Start thinking about yourself more and others less. Since you have a choice between taking care of someone else, or giving to yourself, try choosing yourself sometimes.”

ResentmentSelf CareCodependencyHealing InsightsResentfulRecovery From AbuseCodependenceResentment QuotesCo Dependence
Book:The Right to Innocence: Healing the Trauma of Childhood Sexual Abuse: A Therapeutic 7-Step Self-Help Program for Men and Women, Including How to Choose a Therapist and Find a Support Group
Create image

“While in principle groups for survivors are a good idea, in practice it soon becomes apparent that to organize a successful group is no simple matter. Groups that start out with hope and promise can dissolve acrimoniously, causing pain and disappointment to all involved. The destructive potential of groups is equal to their therapeutic promise. The role of the group leader carries with it a risk of the irresponsible exercise of authority. Conflicts that erupt among group members can all too easily re-create the dynamics of the traumatic event, with group members assuming the roles of perpetrator, accomplice, bystander, victim, and rescuer. Such conflicts can be hurtful to individual participants and can lead to the group’s demise. In order to be successful, a group must have a clear and focused understanding of its therapeutic task and a structure that protects all participants adequately against the dangers of traumatic reenactment. Though groups may vary widely in composition and structure, these basic conditions must be fulfilled without exception. Commonality with other people carries with it all the meanings of the word common. It means belonging to a society, having a public role, being part of that which is universal. It means having a feeling of familiarity, of being known, of communion. It means taking part in the customary, the commonplace, the ordinary, and the everyday. It also carries with it a feeling of smallness, or insignificance, a sense that one’s own troubles are ‘as a drop of rain in the sea.’ The survivor who has achieved commonality with others can rest from her labors. Her recovery is accomplished; all that remains before her is her life.”

HealingGroupsConflictAuthorityVictimTraumaRecoveryTherapyConnectionBelongingFamiliarityAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing The PastConflict ResolutionHealing InsightsCommonalityTraumatizedGroupSupporting OthersHealing From AbuseHealing TraumaRecovery From AbuseGroup DynamicsGroup TherapyTrauma TherapyAuthority And AttitudeBystanderPerpetratorGroup MentalitySupport GroupSupportivenessDrama TriangleRescuerAccompliceRe Enact TraumaGroup ConflictKarpman
Book:Trauma and Recovery: The Aftermath of Violence - From Domestic Abuse to Political Terror
Create image

“I started crying. "When will it stop hurting?" "I don't know. I wish I could tell you. I wish I could take the pain away. But it will get better and easier for you over time.”

GriefHealing QuotesEmotional PainChild Sexual AbuseHealing The PastHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseChild Abuse Survivor
Book:The Sum of My Parts: A Survivor's Story of Dissociative Identity Disorder
Create image

“To heal from child sexual abuse you must believe that you were a victim, that the abuse really did take place. This is often difficult for survivors. When you’ve spent your life denying the reality of your abuse, when you don’t want it to be true, or when your family repeatedly calls you crazy or a liar, it can be hard to remain firm in the knowledge that you were abused.”

DenialChild Sexual AbuseSurvivorsIncestDysfunctional FamilyChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorRecovery From AbuseHealing Abuse
Book:The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse
Create image

“The unconscious mind always operates in the present tense, and when a memory is buried in the unconscious, the unconscious preserves it as an ongoing act of abuse in the present of the unconscious mind. The cost of repressing a memory is that the mind does not know the abuse ended.”

HealingAbuseChild AbuseSubconsciousSexual AbuseChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing InsightsUnconscious MindRepressed MemoriesDissociative AmnesiaHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseHealing AbuseTrauma MemoryDissociated
Book:Repressed Memories: A Journey to Recovery from Sexual Abuse
Create image

“When there is inconsistency in belief and action (such as being violated by someone who is supposed to love you) our mind has to make an adjustment so that thought and action are aligned. So sometimes the adjustment that the mind makes is for the victim to bring her or his behavior in line with the violator, since the violator cannot be controlled by the victim. Our greatest source of survival is to adapt to our environment. So increasing emotional intimacy with a person who is forcing physical intimacy makes sense in our minds. It resolves cognitive dissonance.”

HealingSurvivalVictimDomestic ViolenceSexual AbuseRapeViolationChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsSexual ViolenceCognitive DissonanceHealing From AbuseChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorRecovery From AbuseStockholm SyndromeEmotional IntimacyTrauma BondingSexual Abuse Of A Child
Book:Tree Leaves: Breaking The Fall Of The Loud Silence
Create image

“Society gives the image of sexual violators as weird, ugly, anti-social, alcoholics. Society gives the impression that violators kidnap children are out of their homes and take them to some wooded area and abandon them after the violation. Society gives the impression that everyone hates people who violate children. If all of these myths were true, healing would not be as challenging as it is. Half of our healing is about the actual abuse. The other half is about how survivors fit into society in the face of the myths that people hold in order to make themselves feel safe. The truth is that 80% of childhood sexual abuse is perpetrated by family members. Yet we rarely hear the word “incest”. The word is too ugly and the truth is too scary. Think about what would happen if we ran a campaign to end incest instead of childhood sexual abuse. The number one place that children should know they are safe is in their homes. As it stands, as long as violators keep sexual abuse within the family, the chances of repercussion by anyone is pretty low. Wives won’t leave violating husbands, mothers won’t kick their violating children out of the home, and violating grandparents still get invited to holiday dinners. It is time to start cleaning house. If we stop incest first, then we will strengthen our cause against all sexual abuse.”

HealingSocietyAbuseDenialViolationChild Sexual AbuseSurvivorsMythsIncestHealing InsightsSociety DenialDysfunctional FamiliesChild RapeClean HouseHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbusePedophile ProtectorsPedophile Protector
Author:Rosenna Bakari
Create image

“The bridge out of shame is outrage. Suddenly the obvious becomes stunningly clear—we have been carrying shame for the crime of the offender…In a clear flash we may see ourselves standing in a fierce stance, grounded by our knowledge, ready to throw off any wrongdoer. Our outrage can be a fueling energy, capable of making us as steely as we need to be.”

HealingCrimeShameRageRecoveryRapeOutrageChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsChild RapeHealing From AbuseRecovery From Abuse
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“For change to occur in us, we must be willing to enter the wilderness of the unknown and to wander in unfamiliar territory, directionless and often in the darkness....We do not need to keep every little thing under control. In fact, we find ourselves only by allowing some falling apart to happen.”

LostChangeHealingFalling ApartAbuse SurvivorsHealing InsightsFear Of ChangeHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseLosing ControlUnfamiliar Territory
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Though our childhood abuse left us feeling someone ought to make reparation to us, if we wait a lifetime for that, we may never receive what we need. We choose instead to face the idea that from now on, we are going to take responsibility for caring for ourselves.”

HealingAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing InsightsRecovery From AbuseNo ApologiesReparationAsk For Forgiveness
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Some people equate trauma to something big like war, death, extreme acts of violence, physical abuse, sexual abuse, or natural disasters. While those are all examples of trauma, trauma doesn’t have to be big like that.”

PtsdTrauma HealingTraumatizedRecovery From AbusePtsd RecoveryRecovery Inspiration
Book:Your Journey To Success: How to Accept the Answers You Discover Along the Way
Create image

“Healing was a terrifying and painful experience and my life was as full of struggle and heartache as it had always been. Several years after I started therapy, I began to feel happy. I was stunned. I hadn't realized that the point of all this work on myself was to feel good. I thought it was just one more struggle in a long line of struggles. It took a while before I got used to the idea that my life had changed, that I felt happy, that I was actually content. Learning to tolerate feeling good is one of the nicest parts of healing.”

HealingContentmentHealing The PastHealing JourneyHealing InsightsHealing The Emotional SelfHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseHealing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Book:The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Deciding to actively heal is terrifying because it means opening up to hope. For many survivors, hope has brought only disappointment. Although it is terrifying to say yes to yourself, it is also a tremendous relief when you finally stop and face your own demons. There is something about looking terror in the face, and seeing your own reflection, that is strangely relieving. There is comfort in knowing that you don't have to pretend anymore, that you are going to do everything within your power to heal. As one survivor put it, "I know now that every time I accept my past and respect where I am in the present, I am giving myself a future." - The Courage to Heal”

HealingRecoveryTrue SelfAuthentic SelfAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing JourneySaying YesReal SelfLooking To The FutureHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseSay YesNot PretendingAccepting The PastFacing Your DemonsAccept Your Own TruthDon T PretendSay Yes To YourselfTime To HealChoosing To HealCos Sexual Abuse SurvivorsDeciding To HealGave Your Feelings
Book:The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Sexual abuse is an experience, not a definition to be encased in; you are far greater than any experience suffered through the insidiousness of indifference in the form of pedophilia. Reaching out for help is not a weakness, it is strength and courage in action. Recovery is not easy nor is it a quick process however, all souls are worth the effort required. Who you have come to believe you are can be very divergent from who your naturally are.”

Healing The PastChildhood TraumaSelf HealingChildhood AbusePedophileRecovery From AbuseChildhood Sexual AbusePedophile Priests
Book:Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of abuse hidden behind closed doors
Create image

“Your instincts may tell you that you can’t survive if you experience feelings. But they are leftover child instincts. They’re the ones that first told you to freeze your feelings. They themselves are frozen and haven’t grown with the rest of you. These instincts don’t know that you’re far more capable of learning to cope with overwhelming emotion now than when you were a [child].”

FeelingsRecoveryFreezeNumbAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsNumbnessHealing InsightsRecovery From AbuseEmotional WoundsUnemotionalFrozen In TimeEmotionally Compromised
Author:Maureen Brady
Create image

“We can ill afford to wait until we have worked through all our memories & feelings about incest before learning to rest & play. While it may seem to be a natural impulse to get to the bottom of things & purge ourselves fully, we need to regularly examine the full picture of our lives for balance along the way…Learning to rest & play is an essential part of our healing.”

HealingAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsHealing The Emotional SelfRecovery From AbuseHealing AbuseChild Sexual Abuse Survivors
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“When you feel at sea in an abyss of emotions, reconnecting to the beauty of your soul can be difficult, but it is never impossible.”

Emotional AbuseEmotional PainAbuse SurvivorsChildhood TraumaAbuse RecoverySoul ConnectionRecovery From AbuseSoul Awakening SpiritualityEmbracing Who You AreReleasing Shame
Book:Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of Paedophilic abuse
Create image

“You’re too sensitive’ victims of sexual abuse are told over and over by those whose reality depends on being insensitive. Most adults who have been in the victim role cringe when anyone tells them they are sensitive. In fact, sensitivity is a lovely trait and one to be cherished in any human being.”

CriticismVictimSensitiveEmotional AbuseAbuse SurvivorsHurtfulInsensitivePsychological AbuseInsensitivityHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseHurtful WordsVictim Role
Book:Repressed Memories: A Journey to Recovery from Sexual Abuse
Create image

“We each have our own ways of sabotaging & keeping ourselves down…Do we need to remain the victim so strongly that we pull the ceiling down upon our own heads? There is a comfort in the familiar. Also, it is important to us to be in control because as children being abused we were not at all in control. In self-sabotage we can be both the victim & the victimizer.”

HealingComfortableVictimControlComfort ZoneAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing InsightsSelf SabotageVictimizationHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseVictim Role
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“One way [to recovery] would be by creating the best possible romance book or happy ending scenario for you ... out od your own experience. Another way would be to look at it as it is: a wake-up call to action to create a more humane world, without discrimination and sexism.”

LoveInspirationHopeRelationshipsFeminismLove HurtsHappy EndingsScamsRecovery From Abuse
Book:Love on the Line: How to Recover from Romance Scams Gracefully and Without Victimisation
Create image

“In spite of the horror, in spite of the tragedy, in spite of the weeks of sleepless nights, I'm finally alive. I'm not pretending. I feel real. I'm not playing charades anymore. I wouldn't go back to the way I was for anything. I'm really like a different person. I'm where I am, and I'm making the most of it. I know I'm courageous now. I found out I had it in me to face this. — Barbara”

HopeHealingRecoveryTrue SelfAuthentic SelfAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing JourneyReal SelfFace Your FearsHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseCharadesChild Abuse SurvivorHealing AbuseChild Abuse SurvivorsNew MeFeel AliveDeciding To ChangeGave Your Fears ChoiceHope And Disappointment
Book:The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse
Create image

“In the east," she says after a time, her gaze still downcast, "there is a tradition known as kintsukuroi. It is the practice of mending broken ceramic pottery using lacquer dusted with gold and silver and other precious metals. It is meant to symbolize that things can be more beautiful for having been broken." "Why are you telling me this?" I ask. At last she looks at me. Her irises are polished obsidian in the moonlight. "Because I want you to know," she says, "that there is life after survival.”

InspirationalHealingRecoveryRecovery From Abuse
Book:The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue
Create image

“Abuse is never contained to a present moment, it lingers across a person’s lifetime and has pervasive long-term ramifications.”

IndifferenceNarcissismAbuse SurvivorsChildhood TraumaPedophileRecovery From AbuseChildhood Sexual AbuseAbusedPeadophiliaIndifference And Bullying
Book:Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of Paedophilic abuse
Create image