Quotessence
Home / Topics / Emotional Neglect Quotes

Emotional Neglect Quotes

Browse 33 quotes about Emotional Neglect.

Emotional Neglect Quotes

“When basic human needs are ignored, rejected, or invalidated by those in roles and positions to appropriately meet them; when the means by which these needs have been previously met are no longer available: and when prior abuse has already left one vulnerable for being exploited further, the stage is set for the possibility these needs will be prostituted. This situation places a survivor who has unmet needs in an incredible dilemma. She can either do without or seek the satisfaction of mobilized needs through some "illegitimate" source that leaves her increasingly divided from herself and ostracized from others. While meeting needs in this way resolves the immediate existential experience of deprivation and abandonment. it produces numerous other difficulties. These include experiencing oneself as “bad” or "weak" for having such strong needs; experiencing shame and guilt for relying on “illegitimate” sources of satisfaction: experiencing a loss of self-respect for indulging in activities contrary to personal moral standards of conduct; risking the displeasure and misunderstanding of others important to her; and opening oneself to the continued abuse and victimization of perpetrators who are all too willing to selfishly use others for their own pleasure and purposes under the guise of being 'helpful.”

NeedsHumanityEvilWeaknessAbuseShameVictimGuiltVulnerabilityManipulationNeglectSurvivorAbandonedChild AbuseExploitationEmotional AbuseDeprivedAbandonmentProstitutionDeprivationAbuse Of PowerBasic NeedsGuilty ConscienceVictimizationOstracismEmotional NeglectExploitInvalidationAbuse Of Authority
Author:J. Jeffrey Means
Create image

“….Nothing was inevitable. She had not chosen this way. It was her fate. It had been decided since before time began. It had been decided before she began. Nothing could be done. There was no point in trying. It was way too late. The inevitability of nothing was totally supreme, overriding everything. No way out. No way through. She could only accept the unacceptable. She could only endure the unendurable. Nothing was wrong! Nothing was wrong and the wrongness of this awesome nothing seeped from her. Some people, only a few, saw it. Some people, only a few felt it. Some people, only a few, recognised it and in recognising it for what it was, raged against it. Through the nothingness, these few reached out for her. She could not reach back. Through the nothingness, these few fought for her. She could not fight back for herself. Through the nothingness, these few cared for her. She could not care back for herself. Through the nothingness, these few spoke out for her, shattering the frozen silence over and over again. She could not speak out for herself…. “ *I hope this may give some comfort to people who need it. There are good, caring people (whether outside or within yourself, if need be) and you do deserve to be cared for and supported as much as anyone else does." From “Nothing”, one of the short stories in “Fight! Rabbit! Fight!”

CareSilenceComfortAbuseNeglectHopelessnessEmotional AbuseRitual AbuseUnendurableEmotional Neglect
Book:Fight! Rabbit! Fight!
Create image

“Marilla looked at her with a tenderness that would never have been suffered to reveal itself in any clearer light than that soft mingling of fireshine and shadow. The lesson of a love that should display itself easily in spoken word and open look was one Marilla could never learn. But she had learned to love this slim, gray-eyed girl with an affection all the deeper and stronger from its very undemonstrativeness. Her love made her afraid of being unduly indulgent, indeed. She had an uneasy feeling that it was rather sinful to set one's heart so intensely on any human creature as she had hers set on Anne, and perhaps she performed a sort of unconscious penance for this by being stricter and more critical than if the girl had been less dear to her.”

LoveEmpathyShameMotherhoodAuthoritarianismLegalismEmotional NeglectStrictness
Book:Anne of Green Gables
Create image

“Marilla looked at her with a tenderness that would never have been suffered to reveal itself in any clearer light than that soft mingling of fireshine and shadow. The lesson of a love that should display itself easily in spoken word and open look was one Marilla could never learn. But she had learned to love this slim, gray-eyed girl with an affection all the deeper and stronger from its very undemonstrativeness. Her love made her afraid of being unduly indulgent, indeed. She had an uneasy feeling that it was rather sinful to set one's heart so intensely on any human creature as she has hers set on Anne, and perhaps she performed a sort of unconscious penance for this by being stricter and more critical than if the girl had been less dear to her.”

LoveEmpathyShameMotherhoodLegalismEmotional NeglectStrictness
Book:Anne of Green Gables
Create image

“Miracles can be found in the most unlikely of places. I found the light not by swimming to the surface, but by letting myself drown in the seas of my deepest fears. Not by eradicating the dark, but by embracing it. I realized that there is no such a thing as darkness, only light and the absence of it. It is there in the light of unconditional love that I finally found the freedom I had been searching for so long.”

SpiritualitySelf LoveEmpowermentMental HealthTraumaAwakeningEmotional AbuseAbuse SurvivorsOvercoming Challenges QuotesEmotional Neglect
Book:Winter Magnolia
Create image

“Because we were treated neglectfully and abusively in our young years—when we most needed self-love to be mirrored—it was difficult to hold onto…We take up the challenge of learning to love ourselves, through our highs & our lows, when we are finding acceptance from others and when we are being closed out and rejected.”

HealingSelf LoveNeglectSelf AcceptanceLove YourselfChild AbuseEmotional AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSelf Love QuotesHealing InsightsHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseChild Abuse SurvivorsEmotional NeglectChild Neglect
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
Create image

“Another reason it's dangerous to acknowledge that you were unloved is that it implies the possibility that your mother may have been right-you are unlovable.”

ChildhoodParentsChild AbuseMothers And DaughtersChildhood TraumaScapegoatInferiority ComplexMother Daughter RelationshipEmotional NeglectAttachment Trauma
Book:When You and Your Mother Can't Be Friends: Resolving the Most Complicated Relationship of Your Life
Create image

“I was so moved that she remembered my birthday that I cried harder than I had in years. When I returned her call, she told me her computer was broken and she couldn't afford to replace it. My heart fell. As I had done so many times before, I went to her rescue. Still on the phone, I went online and bought her a new laptop, top-of-the-line. That was what she had really called for, She thanked me and hung up. I went to Casey, sobbing. Soon afterward, I closed the bank account and asked my mom to not ask me for any more gifts or money. Now my relationship with my mom is very limited, and it's still very painful for me. She continues to occasionally send me bills she can't pay. I respond by telling her that I love her but I cannot pay her bills.”

Selfish PeopleChild Abuse SurvivorBeing IgnoredEmotional NeglectAbusive MotherBad ParentingBeing UsedDrama TriangleRescuing Others
Book:The Sum of My Parts: A Survivor's Story of Dissociative Identity Disorder
Create image

“Why didn't I feel that I belonged to my parents? How early could I have known that I was not right? I think it has always been part of me. Can a newborn sense her parents' disappointment and feelings of frustration at not being able to change the unchangeable?”

Abusive ParentsEmotional NeglectUnmet NeedsChild NeglectChildhood NeglectUnwanted Child
Book:The Flock: The Autobiography of a Multiple Personality
Create image

“If the abuser is a parent or caretaker, the abuse may be the most attention the child has had from that person. To the child, withholding attention can be a powerful form of coercion. Sexual molestation may be accompanied by physical expressions of affection that are sometimes the only affection the child receives.”

CoercionChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsIncestPsychological AbuseAbusive ParentsEmotional NeglectChild AbusersAbusive ParentAttachment TraumaChild MolestationManipulativenessAbusive ParentingIncestusousWithholding Attention
Book:Lost in the Mirror: An Inside Look at Borderline Personality Disorder
Create image

“In order to survive our youth, many of us became sensitized to which conditions we had to play to, to receive attention. No wonder we mistook this attention for love. We thought love came in finite quantities—it had to be competed for among siblings, or it had to be paid for with exacting dues.”

HealingSurvivorChild AbuseEmotional AbuseChild Sexual AbuseCompetitivenessHealing InsightsUnlovedChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorChild Abuse SurvivorEmotional NeglectConditional LoveParental NeglectSurvival Mechanism
Author:Maureen Brady
Create image

“I smiled and looked at her- there she was with such a genuine grin and twinkle in her eyes. I kissed my mother on her forehead and took a long look in to her hazel eyes. I wondered when I would have the next chance to see her as I whispered, 'I love you." Mother didn't respond. She didn't look well- she had a tint of green and yellow to her skin and her thinning hair was a dull salt and pepper color, cut extra short and clinging to her scalp. She had no makeup on, which told me she just had no more energy. I began to walk out of her room and turned to look at her. I wanted to run up to her, shake her, and beg her to tell me she loved me and was proud of me. But when I looked at her, she was already sleeping.”

LoveMotherAttachmentMothers And DaughtersAbusive ParentsEmotional WoundsEmotional NeglectUnreciprocated LoveInsecure Attachment
Book:Chocolate Flowers
Create image

“when a child is ridiculed, shamed, hurt or ignored when she experiences and expresses a legitimate dependency need, she will later be inclined to attach those same affective tones to her dependency. Thus, she will experience her own (and perhaps others’) dependency as ridiculous, shameful, painful, or denied. - Dependency in the Treatment of complex PTSD and Dissociative Disorders 2001 Authors: Kathy Steele, Onno van der Hart, Ellert R. S. Nijenhuis”

NeedsShameParentingAshamedDeniedDependenceEmotional AbuseEmotional PainDependencySelf HatredSelf HateInternal ConflictNeedinessEmotional NeedsEmotional WoundsShamingEmotional NeglectNeedingInternal VoicesDependence And Attitude
Author:Kathy Steele
Create image

“Emotional abuse can leave a victim feeling like a shell of a person, separated from the true essence of who they naturally are. It also leads to a victim feeling tormented and tortured by their own emotions.”

NarcissismChildhood TraumaAbuse Of PowerNarcissistic AbuseGaslightingBullying QuotesEmotional WoundsEmotional NeglectMe TooChildhood Neglect
Book:Breaking Free From the Chains of Silence: A respectful exploration into the ramifications of Paedophilic abuse
Create image

“My parents never recognized the things that for me were achievements. I was praised for the things that came naturally to me, like my intelligence, but when I really put all my effort into looking nice (trying to), it went unrecognised. No-one ever told me I looked pretty or nice, or that I was a beautiful person (to them) and I needed them to...”

Body ImageLow Self EsteemEmotional NeglectUnmet NeedsChildhood NeglectFeeling IgnoredFeeling UglyFeeling Unloved
Book:To Die For
Create image

“There was another problem with Emma's father, difficult for a small child who already thought of herself as greedy - his way of trying to keep her attention, to bribe her, with gifts. On each vof her visits, he would appear with you presents, beautifully wrapped> And her confusion that she liked - and wanted - the presents, but not the man, was painful. He used 'sparkly Sellotape' and cut things into nice shapes and she wistfully writes: I wish he'd be able to translate that care into his treatment of me.”

ConfusionEmotional PainEmotional NeglectBad Parenting SkillsMixed Messages
Book:To Die For
Create image

“Whatever it was her father wanted, Emma did not know how to provide it. She felt confused by what he did, and imagined the problem was a lack in her, rather than him. And there was something else: My dad was always late when we had our meetings - i i never wanted to go in the first place, and then i'd be sitting and waiting, feeling so ugly and worthless because i wasn't worth being on time for . . . One time when my father was late he said he fell asleep . . . I wouldn't let myself cry in front of him.”

FatherWorthlessnessEmotional NeedsEmotional Neglect
Book:To Die For
Create image

“I think my husband loved me as a vessel. [...] He never took the time to discover my body, he never explored it for what it could offer aside from the obvious, he never found in me, in my essence, a purpose other than to carry children, and when I admitted I couldn’t do this for him he turned away from me. He had no more use for my limbs or my skin, my muscles or tongue or fingertips. He couldn’t even see me anymore.”

PainRelationshipsMarriageIdentityWomanhoodIntrospectiveGender RolesObjectificationEmotional NeglectLoss Of Self
Book:Wild Dark Shore
Create image

“Their experiences with their parents have taught them that relationships mean feeling abandoned and burdened at the same time. To these people, relationships feel like traps.”

RelationshipsEmotional IntelligenceEmotional AbuseEmotional Neglect
Book:Self-care for Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: Honor Your Emotions, Nurture Your Self and Live With Confidence
Create image