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Quote by Julie Mayhew

“What feelings are coming up for you? I can't think of anything to say. Should I literally do what the question asks, stick two fingers down my throat and vomit up the strange, dark monster that has made its home inside of me? We could interrogate this creature instead.”

Quote by Julie Mayhew

Book:Red Ink

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Red Ink

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Julie Mayhew

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“Take five pounds of hulled whole wheat. Hold it in your arms. Feel that it weighs nothing compared to the load that lays heavy on your heart. Wash the wheat, let your tears join in. Strike a match, strike up faith, light the gas, Watch the wheat bubble and boil. See steam rising like hope. Take the pot from the heat and pour the wheat through a sieve. Lay the grain on a sheet overnight to dry. Rest your head on your own sheets. Dream of a flower dying, shedding its seeds, allowing another flower to grow.”

“In the morning, on the day of remembrance, put the wheat in a bowl with walnuts, almonds and parsley. Add a message of devotion, a wish for the future, your gratitude to God. Sprinkle in cinnamon, not guilt. Throw in sesame seeds, throw away your fear. Turn out your mixture and create a mound - a monument to love. Brown some flour and sift. Add a layer of sugar. Press flat. Finally, crush the skin of a pomegranate with the remains of your fury and spread the seeds with love, in the shape of a cross.”

“The only way I've been able to cope is to set up house in a metaphorical white room. Keep everything simple. Color is emotion; the thing that drives me to please like an insatiable addiction, and that addiction puts me in jeopardy of compromise. Compromising for the sake of pleasing makes the intellectual in me want to puke. Hating myself in any way makes me grieve, and that's something I can't afford.”