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“Lots of people make fun of me, but the truth is I'm just a man. I like food, I like people, and I like making people happy with food. I have a wife; I have two sons. I love them more than anything. Sure, my TV personality might not be for everyone, but that's okay. I just want to live my life. Please, leave me in peace. I am a man. I have dignity. I am a man.”

“If you give a little credit to the concept of the artist, I think you ought to indulge excesses a bit, because that reflects the personality of the writer. Now if a joke is in bad taste or it's not funny, okay, that's awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer's job is, and I don't think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.”

“I think whoever runs next time has to have a very clear idea of where he or she wants to take America and has to run on those ideas, because the election cannot be about personalities, participants sniping, all of the irrelevant stuff the day after the election sort of dissipates, and you wake up and say, okay, now what am I going to do?”

“You forget: I have an addictive personality. I'm addicted to you. Somehow I think you could do all sorts of bad things to me, and I'd still come back to you. Just keep things honest, okay? Tell me what you're feeling. If you're feeling something for Dimitri that's confusing you, tell me. We'll work it out.”