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Bonnie Badenoch Quotes

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Famous Bonnie Badenoch Quotes

“This reassurance that we only want to witness and acknowledge what is happening may be the essential stance that deepens safety. When we have no intention of being an active agent of change, the feeling of possible coercion seems to leave the relationship.”

CompassionAcceptanceEmpathyRespectWitnessNonviolenceTrauma HealingCompanioningInterpersonal Mindfulness
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“My multifaceted canary in the coal mine signaling the impulse to control is my belly tightening, my posture changing slightly to lean forward, tension increasing in my upper arms. It feels as though I am preparing to thrust myself into the middle of the problem with everything I know. It comes from a good-hearted place of wanting to relieve suffering and also diminishes interpersonal safety as my system enters mild to medium sympathetic arousal. If we take a step back, we might become curious about how the neuroception of danger arose in the first place, because that is what initiates this chain of events. If we were to explore this, many answers might come: We have been trained to intervene; we don't have any experience that tells us our patient's systems are trustworthy guides to healing; the upset in our patient is severe enough that we fear for her safety; if we can't heal this person, there's something wrong with us; strong emotions are uncomfortable for us and we need to regulate them before they overwhelm us. The list is endless, individual and likely changes with each new circumstance. It is always a most valuable inquiry, especially if we can begin it with compassionate curiousity, which makes it less likely that we will feel shamed by the answer that presents itself. When we remember that neuroception is an automatic adaptive process, it may take character condemnation out of the equation when we invite awareness of what frightens us. If our fear feels heard and acknowledged, there is some likelihood that our bodies will be able to find their way back toward receptivity. As we feel our own openness returning, we can be certain that this embodied change is also influencing our patient and the quality of the connection.”

CompassionEmpathyPerson CenteredSafe PresencePolyvagal TheorySelf Compassion For TherapistsSelf Care For TherapistsSupport For TherapistsTherapy Case StudyAutonomic Nervous System
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“In various paradigms of practice, we have called these protectors "defenses" or "resistances", as though they were objects that needed to be moved out of the way. This is understandable, because we see that these parts of ourselves sometimes cause injury if we view them only from the outer perspective, without opening to the ways they are sheltering our inner world.”

HopeUnderstandingHealingCompassionEmpathyMental HealthTrauma
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“It might be possible that 'triggered' may not be the most helpful word ... For me, there is a felt sense of violence in this word, while 'touched and awakened' more accurately describes what happens to these sequestered neural nets. This gentler wording helps us cultivate a sense of meeting the experience every time we are so 'touched' with an appreciation for what it might be offering.”

PainEmpathyTraumaTherapyPtsdAwakenedTriggerHealing LanguageSelf Empathy
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“When we talk about cultivating a nonjudgemental, agendaless space between, we might easily believe this means we are passively present. Quite the contrary. We are dynamically awake in the midst of the inner stillness and receptivity, attending to and following what is emerging in our people.”

EmpathyListening SkillsAttunementLeft HemisphereRight HemisphereNonjudgementIain Mcgilchrist TherapyThe Divided Brain In Therapy
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“Following is about linking with another and keeping that one in the center of flowing awareness, which is exactly what the right hemisphere has the potential to do beautifully. In fact, we may best begin by following our own internal movement as it arises in the presence of the other person.”

EmpathyFollowingPerson CenteredAttunementRight HemisphereHealing In RelationshipsHealing Partnerships
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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“Each time we offer a reflection, we are also quietly repairing/disconfirming attachment wounds that always contain elements of our parents or others not being able to see us because of their own injuries.”

HealingListeningEmpathyReflectionSafe SpaceInner WisdomDeep ListeningPerson CenteredCo Regulation
Book:The Heart of Trauma: Healing the Embodied Brain in the Context of Relationships
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