“I read things that male relationship experts write about women and I read things that female relationship experts write about men, then I feel a true sadness in my heart. Why can’t there be a simple, pure, direct openness? Why can’t there be a simple, real, open trust? The truth is that male or female, gay or straight— we are all people— we have all been broken and put back together in so many different ways... it’s really just about learning how to recognize the sound of the other one's cracks. And that’s what it’s really about, just that.” PeopleInspirational QuotesRelationshipsHonestyTrustWisdom QuotesMen And WomenOpennessRelationship Experts Author:C. JoyBell C.
“There is a relationship between the eye contacts we make and the perceptions that we create in our heads, a relationship between the sound of another's voice and the emotions that we feel in our hearts, a relationship between our movements in space all around us and the magnetic pulls we can create between others and ourselves. All of these things (and more) make up the magic of every ordinary day and if we are able to live in this magic, to feel and to dwell in it, we will find ourselves living with magic every day. These are the white spaces in life, the spaces in between the written lines, the cracks in which the sunlight filters into. Some of us swim in the overflowing of the wine glass of life, we stand and blink our eyes in the sunlight reaching unseen places, we know where to find the white spaces, we live in magic.” LifeInspirationalFeelingsInspirational QuotesRelationshipsInspiringMagicLivingLife And LivingEmotionsLiving LifeMagicalLiving In MagicLiving With MagicMagic Of Ordinary Days Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Many of us want to have relationships because we want a nest, a cozy place of acceptance; that unconditional circumstance. Relationships have become the using of another person as soft stuff to build nests with. Many can do this without even liking the other person, or feeling connected to them, or even wanting to actually be near them. I think the animals are better; an animal would never live with someone they don't like, because they don't have to. They have no religion, no laws, no society. And yet, we see swans and wolves and others: mating for life! For no other reason than that they've found their one-and-only.” Life LessonsRelationshipsInspirational LifeRelationship QuotesInspirational LoveLove LessonsLessons In Love Author:C. JoyBell C.
“There is much discussion about consent within the context of sex. But consent is about so much more than that. Consent is about time and it's about energy. It's also spacial in scope. Physical space and mental space. People will act entitled to your time, energy, and space. They need to understand that they're not entitled to these things; these things require your consent.” Life LessonsRelationshipsWisdom QuotesLife And LivingConsentGuidance QuotesConsent Is SexyConsent Of The Woman Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Love in romantic relations is a many-tempered subject, can really not be seen through a single lens. A great number of people will say that they "want love". And it's true: they want LOVE no matter where it comes from, as long as love is being given to them. They'll want it even when it comes from someone they don't like, someone they don't admire, can't stand to be around, and don't even know well enough to say what their favourite colour is. In this light, I do not want love. I don't want love in itself, distinguished apart from where it is coming from. I want to love someone that I want to be around; someone I am connected to in a way that their presence sparks with my presence. I want a person to belong to, because I want to belong to that specific person. Coming home to someone because I like being home with that someone. Because they can add value to my life. So, I don't want love. Not the way that people do. I won't gulp love down no matter where it's coming from. I'd rather not. I will gulp down a person. And that person should want to gulp down me. And that's all I'm looking for.” LoveRelationshipsLove QuotesWisdom QuotesLife And LivingRelationship Quotes Author:C. JoyBell C.
“It is astounding how it's harder to find a person that you "really, really like" than it is to find someone "you love." Why is this? Because we accept the love that we think we deserve. And that usually is ANY love that wants to come along and love us. Also, we are very giving of our love. We love things that we don't like, all the time! We do in fact measure "love" based upon our ability to love the unloveable or the least loveable. If we can do that-- our love must be pure! We love a parent who made our lives hell, we explain away all their wrongdoings; we love someone who has abused us, beaten us up and betrayed us; we take pride in loving what is not loveable. And this is why romantic relationships fail left and right: because we should be with someone we really, really like. And that's harder to find. We should find someone whom we actually really dig, and who really digs us. A person. Not a concept of what we want to perform and enact just because we believe that makes us able to fulfill a "pure love". We cannot stay in toxic, unfulfilling relationships just because we love the person or just because they love us. We have to actually really, really like them and they us.” Life LessonsRelationshipsWisdom QuotesLife And LivingLove Quotes And SayingsRelationships QuotesAbout Love Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The worst thing women can do for men, is spoil them. I see this all around. A woman thinking that the way to keep a man is by showering him like a baby, giving more than any other woman around could give. It disables men, it creates babies out of men, it removes their ability to be doers and givers. It turns them into sitting ducks. It is the worst thing women can do for men: spoil them. Yes, it ruins them for any other woman; but, not for the good reasons. I never want a woman to come into my son's life and spoil him. I will not let that happen to him. I always tell him: you be with a woman who is your equal, someone you can run with, someone who enables you to be a doer, a giver. Another wolf: someone you can run with.” MenRelationshipsWisdom QuotesLife And LivingMen And WomenGuidance QuotesHow We Treat Men Author:C. JoyBell C.
“I think that many people will intentionally overlook all of the lifeless facts about their relationship with their significant other, just because they do not want to go through the trouble of breaking up, because it's safe, because other people expect it of them, because there is a fear of being alone... and in the process of doing this, they miss out on the life that is meant for them. Our lives must not be lived to be safe, to be out of trouble, to meet the expectations of others, and to avoid fear. On the contrary, our lives must be lived with courage, which can only be present if there is fear; our lives must be lived for what we know in our hearts is for us, not for what other people believe is for us; our lives must be lived even when it is not safe and even when things are troublesome. To die in full knowledge that you have pleased everyone safely, or to die in full knowledge that you seized what you knew was meant for you -- which way do you choose to die? Because that is the way you must choose to live!” RelationshipsCourageLife PhilosophyLife And LivingSeize The DayCourage In LifeCourage To Be OneselfHow To Live LifeHow To LiveTime To Let GoRelationships QuoteThe Life That Is Meant For You Author:C. JoyBell C.
“I don't understand dating.. and the other things that people do.. all I know is that you ought to find the one you recognize. The one who gives you four arms, four legs, four eyes, and has the other half of your heart. There's only one of those, so what are all the other things for? Like dating?” LoveLifeInspirationalInspirational QuotesRelationshipsLivingDatingTrue LoveInspirational Love Author:C. JoyBell C.
“How could you love us being together?" he asked me "We are nothing alike and we are not meant for each other and we drive each other crazy, you love that? How can you love that?" So I told him "I know that we're not meant for each other, that we drive each other crazy, and that we are so different. But that's us. That's what we have; a wild nonsense. We are not good together, but together we are bad for each other. I love us together this way just like this. Because even if it's no good, it's what we have! It's us.” LoveInspirational QuotesRelationshipsLoversHumanMen And WomenTrue LoveLove StoryInspirational Love Author:C. JoyBell C.
“You've got to find a man who will build you up. Enough with the boys who like to break things apart and put them back together just to see how they work. Even though you have already built yourself up, the value in adding anyone else to your life lies in the question if whether or not they can add more to that structure. If not, you're better off alone. You've got this one life, who are you going to let into it? And why?” MenLife LessonsRelationshipsWomens Inspirational Author:C. JoyBell C.
“An intelligent man wants to ultimately spend his life with a woman with whom he knows he shares complimentary energies with. He wants to feel like him and his woman are solid, because nothing can throw them off base, because the flow of their connection is just so grounded, that nothing can come in between that— not reason, not logic, not lies, not insecurities, not doubts and not fears. Men don't talk about this, but this is what intelligent men innately crave, and they don't want anything less. They want something solid. They don't want to be with women who want to be with guys who don't respect them or who try to make them jealous all the time; they don't want to be with women who need to feel like there's a game that's being played. So, contrary to popular belief, men do want something real, even more real than what many women dream of! And it's not about other people and what they think is real; it's about just him and her and what they know is real. But you can never fake making a man believe this is the kind of connection that you have with him, because you can't fake energies! At the end of the day, if you're that woman, then you're that woman and he's that man for you. Your connection through your energies will just flow through everything— walls, distance, time, fears— you'll be solid.” MenRelationshipsEnergiesAdvice For WomenLove And RelationshipsReal RelationshipsAbout MenWhat Men WantReal ConnectionsAdvice On Men Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The word that must come to mind when we think of romantic relationships, is the word: "health". It's not "love"; it's "health". We should not be asking ourselves: "Do I love this person?" We need to be asking ourselves: "Am I healthy with this person and is this person healthy with me?" Are you healthy in your mind, heart and body when you are with this person? And do you contribute the same to them? We shouldn't be asking if we love someone. We must ask if we are healthy with someone and if they are healthy with us. This is the grounds for a relationship.” RelationshipsLove QuotesRelationship QuotesInspirational LoveMarriage QuotesRelationship AdviceMarriage Advice Author:C. JoyBell C.
“People usually fall in love. But some people were born in love. Already. And always.” LoveRelationshipsFalling In LoveTrue LoveInspirational LoveReal LoveSoul MatesTwin Flames Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The most important things in a romantic relationship are compromise, honesty, openness, humility and trust. If you don't have these with someone, you don't have anything.” RomanceRelationshipsInspirational LoveInspirational RomanceInspirational Relationships Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Too many relationships and marriages were working because they had parties to go to, weddings to attend, vacations to splurge on, other couples to compete with and people to impress. But now these couples have to sit in front of each other in a world that's ending and rebirthing as something entirely different, and they're realising, that when all those factors are taken away, the person in front of them is someone they don't even like. Friedrich Nietzsche once said, "Invisible threads are the strongest ties" and couples today are comprehending, that they don't have those threads. They only had the visible ones.” RelationshipsRelationship QuotesReality Of LifeReal LoveMarriage QuotesFake LoveReal RelationshipsRelationships In Pandemic Author:C. JoyBell C.
“There are all these relationships that are like cookie cutter shapes; identical and repetitive. Then there are all these relationships that aren't even relationships! Just facades for show and tell. But every once and a while, you'll see this bird breaking out of this cage and it's so weird and it's so obscure and you've hardly ever seen it before so you don't even know at first if you should name it Ugly or Beautiful! Relationships, stories of love, that just shatter the walls around the mind. They made it. They broke through. Like Ugly-Beautiful birds bursting forth from rusty cages! And then suddenly you stop and you think to yourself, "Maybe love really is real.” LoveRelationshipsTrue LoveReal LoveRelationships QuotesFake LoveFacades Author:C. JoyBell C.
“If we were all looking for something 'easy come and easy go', then all of our lives would be easy. The problem is that we look for something real, don't we? And it is this longing for what is real, that makes finding the right person to be the most difficult task in the world. You can marry someone and promise the rest of your life to the person, only to find out later that this person makes you feel lonely. If we had no innate longing for true love and for true partnership, then none of us would have any problems! Therefore, the most frightening question to ponder upon, is, 'what if true love does not exist; what if the real stuff isn't real at all?' In such a case, life would be meaningless. I suppose I would rather believe in love relentlessly, than live in this world meaninglessly.” LoveBelieveRelationshipsTrue LoveMeaning Of LifeReal LoveBelieve In LoveIs Love Real Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The only reason to be in a relationship or in a marriage, is if at the end of the day when the music stops playing and all the people go home and the lights are off and it's quiet and you're alone with that person -- you still don't feel alone. That one person makes you unalone. Because even while the music is playing and all the other people are with you and the lights are on and it's noisy inside of your head -- you're still all alone if that person isn't with you. You need to be with the person that never makes you alone. Even at the end of the day when everything else is gone.” LoveRelationshipsMarriageTrue LoveThe OneGuidance For LifeMeaning Of MarriageMeaning Of Relationship Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The biggest mistake that parents make, is believing that their assigned task in life is to teach their children and to guide them in every situation of their children's lives. The truth is that it is the task of parents to both learn from their children and to guide them as well. Parenting is a relationship that goes both ways, from the moment your child is born, you learn from that person, and in fact, your lessons begin long before your child's lessons do. Later on, when you've learned a great deal already, then they begin to learn from you. Throughout our lives, it is a give-and-take relationship, in many ways. Our assigned task is to learn from our children, and to guide and teach them. Their assigned task is to learn from us, and also to teach us.” ChildrenRelationshipsFamilyWisdom QuotesParentingParentsRaising ChildrenGuidance QuotesQuotes For ParentsThe Art Of Parenting Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Lots of things can be fixed. Things can be fixed. But many times, relationships between people cannot be fixed, because they should not be fixed. You're aboard a ship setting sail, and the other person has joined the inland circus, or is boarding a different ship, and you just can't be with each other anymore. Because you shouldn't be.” LifeRelationshipsLife And LivingSeparationMoving OnLiving LifeBreaking UpFixing ThingsParting Ways Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Sometimes you want to stay with someone, not only because it's magic and it's promising and it feels like home; but sometimes you find someone and you want to stay with him (or her)—because you're the same kind of animal.” LoveRomanceDesireRelationshipsAttractionSexual AttractionMan And WomanAnimalisticRawness Author:C. JoyBell C.
“You'll come to learn that many times, the people you have problems with are not really the people you have problems with; but in actuality, the problems lie in the premises of everybody else in between you, in their suggestive glances, in their implications and tone of voice, in their provocations and less-than-noble intent. Again, it comes down to shutting out the noise that isn't supposed to be there and listening to your inner silence.” RelationshipsWisdom QuotesGossipGuidance QuotesRelationships AdviceInner SilenceBeing MisledDo Not Be Misled Author:C. JoyBell C.
“All the things that people do in order to show that they don't need anybody... meanwhile, all they really want to do is say, "Please keep me." We all want to be kept. The problem is we are too afraid to let anyone know about it. What are these fragile things in our hearts that have so much fear of being broken?” LoveInspirational QuotesFearRelationshipsCourageWisdom QuotesHeartbreakVulnerabilityFear Of LoveBeing VulnerableThe Fear In Loving Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Some people are farsighted and some people are nearsighted. In the mind and in the heart. A farsighted person forgets your magic the closer that you get to them; the nearsighted person sees your magic more and more, the closer and closer that you become to them. You've got to find the nearsighted people. That's just a rule in life. And you've got to be one, too.” RelationshipsWisdom QuotesGuidanceWise AdviceHuman InteractionsFarsightednessNearsightedness Author:C. JoyBell C.
“If I cheated on my spouse or partner, and they made the choice to stay with me regardless, I would leave that person. I will never be perceived as someone who needs a nice warm bath to come home to after rolling around outside in the grass; a coddled person, an infantile person, a person who's choices are perceived as the mistakes of a toddler, only needing to be slapped on the hand and then coddled. That would kill the relationship for me, that would kill everything. I'm not an inconsequential flower, I'm not a purified version washed down to be palatable; I am an equal. My mistakes should be treated as mistakes. I don't need forgiveness for anything that I do.” RelationshipsLove QuotesForgivenessRelationship QuotesForgiveness QuotesHeroineCheating In RelationshipsCheating SpouseFemale HeroineWoman Protagonist Author:C. JoyBell C.
“I think the reason why people's relationships fail, really, is due to the fact that people are always putting their best feet forward all the time and not letting others actually "meet" them. The "meeting" part tends to happen later on and it shocks and disappoints people who have already bought into the best that was put forward. Why not meet people first as who you really are, then help one another, build up one another, encourage and sculpt each other... grow and become, together! Why can't people do that? Your best foot needs to be kept right beside you, right beside the other one.” RelationshipsAdviceWisdom QuotesBeing RealBeing GenuineInspirational RelationshipsBest Foot ForwardHow To Do RelationshipsMeeting People For RealWhy Relationships Fail Author:C. JoyBell C.
“I cannot have a man who is afraid of everything, I don't have the time to soothe insecurities and fears, I cannot have a man who is standing on a stone by a creek, watching for the fish to swim by and every time he sees a fish he says "Oh look, this fish scares me, I wonder what this fish means, this fish might mean- this, or this fish might mean- that" for God's sake, they are just fish, and they don't mean anything! Such a sad thing, so many fine, strong men standing on top of little stones, pointing at fish all the time! Such a waste! Such a waste of time! I can only have a man who will leap into the water, not minding the damn fish and whatever other little things that scare him. I need to have someone who is braver than me; if I am a pirate, he has to be the pirate Captain, if I am a pirate Captain he has to be the flying dragon.” MenFearRelationshipsCourageMen And WomenBraveryDragonsFearsPiratesInsecurities Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Don't let a thief into your house three times. The first time was enough. The second time was a chance. The third time means you're stupid.” PeopleRelationshipsAdviceWisdom QuotesLife And LivingGuidanceWarningThievesFriendshipsDealing With People Author:C. JoyBell C.
“The real thing that keeps men and women apart, is fear. Women blame men and men blame women, but the culprit is fear, women are afraid of one thing, men are afraid of a different thing; the fears of women have to do with losing while the fears of men have to do with not being good enough for something. One is loss, the other is insecurity. Men are innately more insecure than women and women are innately more needful of companionship than men. It's good for both men and women to be able to recognize and identify these fears not only within themselves, but within each other, and then men and women will see that they really do need to help each other. It's not a game, it's not a competition, the two sexes need one another.” FearRelationshipsWisdom QuotesMen And WomenOvercoming FearIdentifying FearThe Two SexesThe Union Of Man And WomanThe Union Of The Two Sexes Author:C. JoyBell C.
“You can have a pet zebra and put that zebra into a small cage every day and tell the zebra that you love it, but no matter how you and the zebra love each other, the fact remains, that the zebra should be let out of that cage and should belong to someone who can treat it better, the way it should be treated, someone who can make it happy.” RelationshipsWisdom QuotesRelationship QuotesAbuseAbusive RelationshipsWrong Relationships Author:C. JoyBell C.
“In every relationship, the deeper the connection goes and the longer the time that passes between the two together— the more and more levels will be dug up which equates to more and more boulders being discovered, more and more buried cities unearthed... people know that a good and real relationship is one that "gets better and better" but then they don't understand what that means. "Getting better and better" doesn't mean "feeling better and better", it doesn't mean there is nothing but honey and dewdrops. "Better and better" means "more and more accomplished together" it means "stronger together" it means herculean victories and lilliputian victories and falling and rising. If, for every time you fall together, you rise together twice, that is a good, real relationship.” Inspirational QuotesRelationshipsWisdom QuotesGood RelationshipsReal RelationshipsWhat Is A Good Relationship Author:C. JoyBell C.
“What does it mean to "cast shade" on your friend? It's when you try to spot their weaknesses, shortcomings or insecurities in any given situation in order to act in the more favourable or popular way, so that you can shine in the eyes of others. Example: Your friend is under sudden, aggressive criticism; instead of helping her out of it, you throw her under the bus by siding with her critics. Another example: your friend has social anxiety; you spot this as an opportunity to be "the fun one" and deliberately, maliciously try to be outgoing and joyful even when you're not genuinely feeling that way. Outshining someone by virtue of deliberate comparison to their vulnerable spots: that is casting shade.” RelationshipsFriendshipsFake FriendsTrue FriendsThrowing ShadeFake FriendshipsCasting Shade Author:C. JoyBell C.
“You can talk with someone for years, everyday, and still, it won't mean as much as what you can have when you sit in front of someone, not saying a word, yet you feel that person with your heart, you feel like you have known the person for forever.... connections are made with the heart, not the tongue.” InspirationalInspirational QuotesHumanityRelationshipsHuman NatureInspirational LifeCommunicationHumanismAffectionInspirational LoveHeartwarmingHuman Connections Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Don’t fall in love with the idea of someone being in love with you; fall in love with a person. Don’t fall in love with the idea of being in love with someone else; fall in love with a person. Don’t fall in love with a concept, an idea, a theory... don’t fall in love with a list on a paper. Fall in love with a person. Always, always, it must be the person.” LoveRelationshipsWisdom QuotesWhat Love IsHow To Love A Person Author:C. JoyBell C.
“Please stop dating and marrying people who are your parents' types. The attraction will not last and you're doing it to fill an unmet need for approval that you never received from your family in childhood. Your romantic partner is not supposed to be a peace offering or any other kind of goodwill offering.” RelationshipsMarriageRelationship QuotesDatingRelationship AdviceDating AdviceAttachment Trauma Author:C. JoyBell C.
“It's absolutely possible to experience bliss during breakups. Bliss that is different, but equal in value to, the euphoria experienced while sharing your life with someone. I am convinced that heartbreak is an unnaturally induced state which we were conditioned into believing is natural. It's a scam. I feel that the breaking of a relation can be equal in value to the making of it. And if we realize the joy that can be mined from the experience, we would eliminate this form of suffering, from our lives, altogether. You can feel catapulted into glistening self-love, enlightenment, growth and confidence, during emergence from the state of being in love with someone. It's a treasure trove of its own merit.” RelationshipsMarriageRelationship QuotesInspirational AttitudeDivorceInspirational LivingBreakupsBreakup QuotesBreaking UpDivorce Quotes Author:C. JoyBell C.