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Hugh Prather

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Famous Hugh Prather Quotes

“Many books on communication are strong on theory but impractical on application. Marshall Rosenberg's instant classic is the stand-out exception. It is clear and compelling in its logic and flat-out inspiring in its inviting exposition of usable techniques and strategies. If this book is read by enough people, the world will transform.”

PeopleIfsWorldBookEnoughStrongClearTheoryCommunicationLogicStrategyTechniqueClassicInstantExceptionFlatsApplicationCompellingStanding OutNonviolent CommunicationInviting
Author:Hugh Prather
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“For communication to have meaning it must have a life. It must transcend "you and me" and become "us." If I truly communicate, I see in you a life that is not me and partake of it. And you see and partake of me. In a small way we then grow out of our old selves and become something new. To have this kind of sharing I cannot enter into a conversation clutching myself. I must enter into it with loose boundaries. I must give myself to the relationship, and be willing to be what grows out of it.”

IfsWayGivingKindSelfGrowsWillingCommunicationConversationCommunicateBoundariesSomething NewOld Self
Book:Notes to Myself
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“perfectionism is a slow death. if everything were to turn out just like i would want it to, just like i would plan for it to, then i would never experience anything new; my life would be an endless repetition of stale successes. when i make a mistake i experience something unexpected.... when i have listened to my mistakes i have grown.”

IfsWantLifeWould BeTurnsMistakePlansEndlessUnexpectedRepetitionPerfectionismMy MistakesStaleSomething Unexpected
Author:Hugh Prather
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“I sometimes react to making a mistake as if I have betrayed myself. My fear of making a mistake seems to be based on the hidden assumption that I am potentially perfect and that if I can just be very careful I will not fall from heaven. But a 'mistake' is a declaration of the way I am, a jolt to the way I intend, a reminder I am not dealing with the facts. When I have listened to my mistakes I have grown.”

IfsWayI CanSometimesFactsSeemsFallHeavenFearPerfectMistakeCarefulBetrayalAssumptionMaking MistakesDeclarationBetrayedRemindersMy Mistakes
Book:Notes to Myself
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“If your reaction to your partner's fear-or any other form of distress- is disdain or irritation, you do not want oneness or even friendship with your partner at that moment.”

IfsWantMomentsFormLetting GoPartnersReactionsOnenessThat MomentDistressDisdainIrritation
Book:The Little Book of Letting Go: Cleanse your Mind, Lift your Spirit, and Replenish your Soul
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“Peace, or freedom from conflict, is the absolute core of happiness. It is in learning to watch our sense of peace that we avoid unhappiness. All forms of misery are heralded by a frame of mind that must become immediately recognizable if we are ever to gain mastery in happiness...Take the time to look in your heart and be clear. Walk through life being clear. Practice doing each thing in peace.”

IfsMindLooksHeartHappinessFormPassionPeaceWalksWatchesPracticeClearConflictGainsAbsolutesMiseryCoreUnhappinessMasteryFrame Of Mind
Author:Hugh Prather
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“Boredom or discontent is useful to me when I acknowledge it and see clearly my assumption that there's something else I would rather be doing. In this way boredom can act as an invitation to freedom by opening me to new options and thoughts. For example, if I can't change the activity, can I look at it more honestly?”

IfsWayLooksI CanExampleActivityHonestlyOpeningAcknowledgeBoredomAssumptionInvitationsDiscontentCan't Change
Book:Notes to Myself: My Struggle to Become a Person
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“Within me is the potential to commit every evil act I see being committed by other men, and unless I feel this potential, I can at any moment be controlled by these same urges. I am free from these urges only if I recognize when I am feeling them, and while feeling them and acknowledging them to be me, choose not to follow them. Only in this way can I begin to regain the disowned parts of me. And only in this way can I know what it is I am criticizing in others.”

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Book:Notes to Myself
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“The ego, as a collection of our past experiences, is continually offering miserable lines of thought. It's as if there were a stream with little fish swimming by, and when we hook one of them there is a judgment. The ego is constantly judging everybody and everything. It has its constant little chit chat about things that can happen in the future, things about the past, too, and these are the little fish that swim by. And what we learn to do-this is why it takes work-is to not reach out and grab a fish.”

IfsLittlesHappensPastLinesJudgingEgoJudgmentConstantFishesMiserableStreamsCollectionsSwimSwimmingReach OutOfferingOur PastHookPast ExperiencesChit Chat
Author:Hugh Prather
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