“And now the lads and lasses, following the example of the birds, bill and coo together.”
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Famous Josh Billings Quotes
“True valor is like honesty; it enters into all that a man sees and does.”
Source: Josh Billings' Wit and Humor
“Vanity is a strange passion; rather than be out of a job it will brag of its vices.”
“It is easier to be virtuous than it is to appear so, and it pays better.”
“Virtue does not consist in the absence of the passions, but in the control of them.”
“A man cannot learn to be wise any more than he can learn to be handsome.”
“Everybody in this world wants watching, but nobody more than ourselves.”
“Unless we put heart and soul into our labor we but brutify our actions.”
“Theres not a lot of good humor in medicine, but theres a lot of medicine in good humor.”
“There's one good thing about tight shoes; they make you forget your other troubles.”
Source: Uncle Sam&s uncle Josh
Source: Josh Billings' Wit and Humor
Source: Uncle Sam's Uncle Josh: Or, Josh Billings on Practically Everything, Distilled from Josh's Rum and Tansy New England Wit by Donald Day
“It strains a man's philosophy the worst kind to laugh when he gets beat.”
Source: Uncle Sam's Uncle Josh: Or, Josh Billings on Practically Everything, Distilled from Josh's Rum and Tansy New England Wit by Donald Day
“Man is my brother, and I am nearer related to him through his vices than I am through his virtue.”
Source: Uncle Sam's Uncle Josh: Or, Josh Billings on Practically Everything, Distilled from Josh's Rum and Tansy New England Wit by Donald Day
“One legged chickens, I know, are the least apt to scratch a garden.”
“Pyrotechnically considered, [laughing] is the fire-works of the soul.”
“We should make virtue our master, not our servant.”
Source: Josh Billings on Ice, and Other Things
“Wisdom that don't make us happier ain't worth plowing for.”
“Man isn't a fool for his ignorance, but rather for believing things that are wrong.”
“The man who has never been tempted doesn't know how dishonest he is.”
“Ignorance ain't not knowin' stuff; ignorance is knowin' stuff that AIN'T TRUE.”
“Life is like a mountain: after climbing up one side and sliding down the other, put up the sled.”
Source: Josh Billings' Wit and Humor