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Piero Ferrucci

Piero Ferrucci Books

Psychotherapist

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“Some time ago, my son Emilio was going back to school after vacation. He did not like the idea at all and was filled with anxiety. To him, the approach of school days was like a monster that threatened him and wanted to squash him. What is a parent supposed to do? I tried to lift his spirits, to distract him, convince him it was not as bad as it seemed, but in vain. Then I hit upon the idea of offering him something that is almost taboo in our family: French fries at a fast-food place. Usually anything that is prohibited appeals to Emilio, especially junk food. I thought I had the ace up my sleeve. But no. Emilio's reply ought to be chiseled in stone: "Dad, you don't solve problems with french fries." Touche. You don't pretend problems do not exist, and you can't solve them with ephemeral distractions. You have to face them with open-eyed honesty. Offering French fries to my son in order to console and distract him from his anxiety was by no means a kind act. I was simply choosing the easier option--far too easy. I had found a comfortable way out.”

FearKindnessHonestyAnxietyValidationBig FeelingsEmotional Validation
Book:The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life
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“Whether we are aware of it or not, every act of trust carries with it a shiver of fear. A favorable situation can become dangerous. Deep down we know that life is insecure and precarious. However, if we do trust, the shiver carries with it a philosophical optimism: Life, with all its traps and horrors, is good The bet is implicit in trust itself. If we could be sure of everyone and everything, trust would have no value - like money, if it were suddenly limitless, or sunshine, if there were always fine weather, or life, if we were to live forever”

IfsKnowsLife IsValuesSituationForeverDangerousFineHorrorOptimismPhilosophicalWeatherSunshineCarrieTrapsInsecureLimitlessDeep DownLive ForeverShiverImplicitPrecariousFine Weather
Author:Piero Ferrucci
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“In trusting, we let ourselves go. We know that all kinds of unexpected events may come our way. Our tension eases, our mind and our hearts open spontaneously to be possibilities. It is an ever new state of mind, in the present moment, because we have detached from all we know. But it is also a feeling as old as can be, because, before all betrayals and all disappointments, there was a time in which trusting another was the very substance of our life.”

KnowsWayMindHeartKindMayStatesMomentsFeelingsOur LivesEventsPossibilityDisappointmentBetrayalAll KindsSubstanceEaseTensionUnexpectedPresent MomentState Of MindDetachedUnexpected Events
Author:Piero Ferrucci
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“The word humility (also human) is derived from the Latin humus, meaning the soil. Perhaps this is not simply because it entails stooping and returning to earthly origins, but also because, as we are rooted in this earth of everyday life, we find in it all the vitality and fertility unnoticed by people who merely tramp on across the surface, drawn by distant landscapes.”

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Author:Piero Ferrucci
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“Awareness by itself is not enough: it must be joined by mastery. We need gradually to develop a steering ability to keep ourselves from slipping mechanically into this or that sub-personality. Thus we become able to identify with each part of our being as we wish. We can have more choice. It is the difference between being impotently transported by a roller coaster and, instead, driving a car and being able to choose which way to go and for what purpose to make the journey.”

WayNeedsEnoughMotivationalAblePurposeChoicesWishDifferencesAbilityJourneyAwarenessCarPersonalityDrivingMasteryWill PowerSlippingRoller CoasterCoastersSteeringWhich Way To Go
Author:Piero Ferrucci
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“Kindness, as we will see, has many facets. But its essence is as simple as can be. We will find that kindness is a way of making _less_ effort. It is the most economic attitude there is, because it saves us much energy that we might otherwise waste in suspicion, worry, resentment, manipulation, or unnecessary defense. It is an attitude that, by eliminating the inessential, brings us back to the simplicity of being.”

WayMightEnergySimpleEffortAttitudeKindnessWorryEconomicWasteEssenceSimplicityDefenseManipulationBe KindResentmentSuspicionUnnecessaryFacetsEliminating
Book:The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life
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“Something similar happens on the other side of the equation: Giving kindness does us as much good as receiving it. . . . The true benefit of kindness is being kind. Perhaps more than any other factor, kindness gives meaning and value to our life, raises us above our troubles and our battles, and makes us feel good about ourselves.”

GivingFeelsKindDoeHappensValuesSidesKindnessOur LivesTroubleBattleBenefitsRaisesFeel GoodFactorsBe KindReceivingEquations
Book:The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life
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“To act honestly- even at the risk of saying the unpleasant truth, or of saying no and causing distress to others- if done with intelligence and tact, is the kindest thing to do because it respects our own integrity and acknowledges in others the capacity to be competent and mature.”

IfsDoneRiskIntegrityCapacityHonestlyAcknowledgeThings To DoMatureDistressCompetentSaying NoTact
Book:The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life
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“If we live in the here and now, each moment is a surprise, every instant a new wonder. But it often fails to work this way. Onto the present we superimpose our expectations and opinions, based on the past or future. We meet someone, and we already anticipate what he/she will be like and what they will say.”

IfsWayMomentsPastWonderOpinionFailingExpectationsSurpriseInstantHere And NowAnticipate
Book:The Power of Kindness: The Unexpected Benefits of Leading a Compassionate Life--Tenth Anniversary Edition
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“Psychosynthesis brings the matter to a point of extreme simplicity, seeing the self as the most elementary and distinctive part of our beings - in other words, its core. This core is of an entirely different nature from all the elements (physical sensations, feelings, thoughts and so on) that make up our personality. As a consequence, it can act as a unifying center, directing those element and bring them into the unity of an organic wholeness.”

DifferentSelfMatterFeelingsSeeingPersonalityElementsConsequenceUnitySimplicityExtremesCoreSensationsWholenessDistinctiveUnifying
Author:Piero Ferrucci
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