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Rachel Naomi Remen

Rachel Naomi Remen Books

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“Perhaps real wisdom lies in not seeking answers at all. Any answer we find will not be true for long. An answer is a place where we can fall asleep as life moves past us to its next question. After all these years I have begun to wonder if the secret of living well is not in having all the answers but in pursuing unanswerable questions in good company.”

WisdomAnswersMysteryQuestionsQuestions In Life
Book:My Grandfather's Blessings : Stories of Strength, Refuge, and Belonging
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“I suspect that the most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention And especially if it's given from the heart. When people are talking, there's no need to do anything but receive them. Just take them in. Listen to what they're saying. Care about it. Most times caring about it is even more important than understanding it. Most of us don't value ourselves or our love enough to know this.”

PeopleIfsKnowsWayNeedsGivingHeartPersonsImportantEnoughCareValuesGivenUnderstandingPowerfulAttentionTalkingCommunicationImportant ThingsCaringSuspectsOur LoveJust Listen
Book:Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that Heal, 10th Anniversary Edition
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“A label is a mask life wears. We put labels on life all the time. 'Right,' 'wrong,' 'success,' 'failure,' . . . Labeling sets up an expectation of life that is often so compelling we can no longer see things as they really are. This expectation often gives us a false sense of familiarity toward something that is really new and unprecedented. We are in relationship with our expectations and not with life itself.”

GivingExpectationsLabelsMaskCompellingFamiliarityUnprecedentedSuccess FailureLabeling
Book:Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that Heal, 10th Anniversary Edition
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“We have become terribly vulnerable, not because we suffer but because we have separated ourselves from each other. A patient once told me that he had tried to ignore his own suffering and the suffering of other people because he had wanted to be happy. Yet becoming numb to suffering will not make us happy. The part in us that feels suffering is the same as the part that feels joy.”

PeopleFeelsWantedJoySufferingBecomingPatientVulnerableNumbSuffering Of Others
Author:Rachel Naomi Remen
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“Ours is not a culture that respects the sick, the old or the vulnerable. We strive for independence, competence, and mastery. In embracing such 'frontier' values, we may become intolerant of human wholeness, contemptuous of anything in ourselves, and in others, that has needs or is capable of suffering. The denial of a vulnerability is the ultimate barrier to compassion.”

NeedsHumansMaySufferingValuesCultureCompassionCapableUltimateSickIndependenceStriveVulnerableDenialVulnerabilityBarriersMasteryWholenessFrontiersCompetenceContemptuous
Author:Rachel Naomi Remen
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“Wounding and healing are not opposites. They're part of the same thing. It is our wounds that enable us to be compassionate with the wounds of others. It is our limitations that make us kind to the limitations of other people. It is our loneliness that helps us to to find other people or to even know they're alone with an illness. I think I have served people perfectly with parts of myself I used to be ashamed of.”

PeopleThinkingKnowsKindHelpingUsedHealingLonelinessOppositesIllnessWoundsUsed To BeLimitationAshamedCompassionate
Author:Rachel Naomi Remen
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“The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention…. A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words.”

WayLoveInspirationalGivingWellsPersonsImportantPowerfulAttentionSilenceAwarenessListeningImportant ThingsHealSilence IsJust ListenListening To OthersKitchen Table
Book:Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that Heal, 10th Anniversary Edition
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“Everybody is a story. When I was a child, people sat around kitchen tables and told their stories. We don't do that so much anymore. Sitting around the table telling stories is not just a way of passing time. It is the way the wisdom gets passed along. The stuff that helps us to live a life worth remembering.”

PeopleWayChildrenHelpingStoriesRememberStuffCommunitySittingTablesPassingPassingsSatKitchenTelling StoriesSitting AroundKitchen Table
Book:Kitchen Table Wisdom: Stories that Heal, 10th Anniversary Edition
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“Perhaps the most important thing we bring to another person is the silence in us, not the sort of silence that is filled with unspoken criticism or hard withdrawal. The sort of silence that is a place of refuge, of rest, of acceptance of someone as they are. We are all hungry for this other silence. It is hard to find. In its presence we can remember something beyond the moment, a strength on which to build a life. Silence is a place of great power and healing.”

LifePersonsImportantHardMomentsRememberPeaceUnderstandingHealingSilencePowerStrengthAcceptanceBuildingCommunicationFindingsEmpathySelf ImprovementCriticismImportant ThingsFilledHungrySympathyInteractionRefugeSilence IsSanctuaryUnspokenGreat PowerMoments In TimeWithdrawalLack Of UnderstandingSilence Is GoldenInteracting With OthersLack Of EmpathyRemember Something
Author:Rachel Naomi Remen
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