Home / Quotes / Quote by Chanakya

Quote by Chanakya

“It is better to be without a king than to have a bad one.”

Author

Chanakya, born in 370 BC and died in 283 BC, was an ancient Indian statesman, economist, and philosopher. He is considered one of the greatest thinkers in ancient India and has had a profound impact on the history of India and the world. more

“Has anyone seen me on Letterman? Two million people watch that show and I don't know where they are. You might have seen this next comedian on the Late Show, but I think more people have seen me at the store. That should be my introduction. "You might have seen this next comedian at the store," and people would say "Hell yes I have!"”

People Thinking Knows Should Two Shows Humor Might Funny Next Watches Millions Hell Late Stores Comedian Having Fun Introduction Letterman

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“It's hard to fight when you're in a gazebo.”

Hard Humor Funny Fighting

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I have some speakers up here, thank God, because last night I didn't have them and I was telling jokes and I had no idea which joke I was telling. So I told jokes twice. I even told that one twice.”

Ideas Humor Funny Lasts Night Jokes No Idea Thank God Speakers Last Night

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I miss the $2 bill, 'cause I can break a two. $20, no. $10, no. $5, maybe, $2? Oh yeah. What do you need, a one and another one?”

Needs I Can Two Humor Funny Causes Break Missing Yeah Bills

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I called the hotel operator and she said, "How can I direct your call?" I said, "Well, you could say 'Action!', and I'll begin to dial. And when I say 'Goodbye', then you can yell 'Cut!'"”

Wells Said Humor Action Funny Cutting Direct Goodbye Hotel Saying Goodbye Operators

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“A dog came to my door, so I gave him a bone, the dog took the bone into the back yard and buried it. I'm going to go plant a tree there, with bones on it, then the dog will come back and say, "Shoot! It worked! I must distribute these bones equally for I have a green paw!"”

Humor Funny Doors Tree Dog Green Plant Bones Buried Yards Paws Plant A Tree

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“Cavities are made by sugar. So if you need to dig a hole, then lay down some candy bars!”

Ifs Needs Made Humor Funny Lays Bars Holes Sugar Candy Candy Bar

Author:Mitch Hedberg

“I like cottage cheese. That's why I want to try other dwelling cheeses, too. How about studio apartment cheese? Tent cheese? Mobile home cheese? Do not eat mobile home cheese in a tornado.”

Want Trying Home Humor Funny Studios Apartment Cheese Mobile Dwelling Tents Cottages Tornadoes

Author:Mitch Hedberg

Quote by Chanakya

Author

You May Also Like