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Quote by Brian Regan

“The government will pay certain farmers to not grow corn. Wow. Where's my check? That'd be great. "Hey, what do you do for a living?" "Well, I don't grow corn. Get up at the crack of noon, make sure there's no corn growing. I'm gonna get up early tomorrow. And not plow. You know, we used to not grow tomatoes-but there's more money in not growing corn."”

Quote by Brian Regan

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Brian Regan
Brian Regan

Brian Regan, born on June 2, 1957, is an American comedian known for his unique humor style and insightful performances. He is renowned for his comedic routines that delve into everyday life, social phenomena, and personal experiences, which have won him a wide fan base. more

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“"Ladies and Gentlemen, we're about to begin boarding. If we could ask for your cooperation, please stay seated until you row has been called." ... That's what they say - but somehow, by the time it comes out of the speaker, it sounds like, "Everybody up and rush the door! Everybody up and try to squeeze your big fat butts in the small gate door area! Immediately! ... Do whatever you have to do to get on board. This is the last helicopter out of Vietnam!"”

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