“My wife and I were poor when I started but we struggled along until things happened for me in my thirties. I knew I was doing what I loved even if I wasn't getting paid for it, so I think I'd still be doing it.” IfsThinkingStillsPoorWifeHappenedPaidMy WifeThings Happen Author:Denis Leary
“I happened to take a photo, and there was my wife, my dog and my banjo, all in the same shot - and I thought, "Oh, that's like a family portrait right there."” WifeHappenedDogShotsMy WifePortraitsMy DogBanjos Author:Steve Martin
“When I was doing drugs and alcohol, I thought I'll have a drink and a line of this and I'll smoke this. I didn't go, 'Then I'm going to go out and get drunk, come back strangle my wife and wake up in jail on charges of attempted murder,' but that's what happened. I'm not telling people what to do. If they can enjoy doing it and they get on with it and they can handle it fine, but don't involve me. I'm lucky to be alive; you're playing with Russian roulette.” PeopleIfsEnjoyLinesAliveWifeHappenedFineDrinkDrugLuckyMurderWake UpMy WifeAlcoholHandleDrunkSmokeJailDrugs And AlcoholRouletteRussian RouletteLucky To Be Alive Author:Ozzy Osbourne
“My wife says, and I agree with her, that what would be really great for Maine would be to legalize dope completely and set up dope stores the way that there are state-run liquor stores. You could get your Acapulco gold or your whatever it happened to be - your Augusta gold or your Bangor gold. And people would come from all the other states to buy it, and there could be a state tax on it. Then everybody in Maine could have a Cadillac.” PeopleWayStatesWould BeRunningWifeHappenedTaxesGoldAgreeMy WifeStoresReally GreatLiquorDopeMaineCadillacsAugustaLiquor StoresAcapulco Book:Bare bones: conversations on terror with Stephen King Source: Bare bones: conversations on terror with Stephen King
“I used to be jealous; I'm not jealous anymore. And a miracle happened to me, because if you're jealous, it's a cancer, it's a plague on your spirit, it really is. And I actually cured jealousy in a very weird way - I cured it with mathematics. And I'm not a math person at all, but I've been with my wife for about seven years, so we have had sex probably, I'd like to think, like, 9 million times or, at least, 1,500. So, the way I figured it, if she goes out and screws some other guy once - I'm still winning.” IfsThinkingWayYearsPersonsStillsHumorFunnyUsedSpiritGuyWinningSexMillionsWifeHappenedMiracleMathematicsSevenCancerMy WifeMathUsed To BeJealousScrewsSeven YearsPlagueOther GuysBeing JealousNot Jealous Author:Marc Maron
“God, she's growing up, and I don't know when it happened, man. I used to buy her Minnie Mouse panties and little Winnie the Pooh underwear. I was helping my wife fold cloths. I picked up a pair of skimpy underwear. I looked at my wife and said: "When you gonna wear these for me?" She goes, "I can't. They're your daughter's." "Aaaaaaahhhhhh! No, No, No!" There was nothing to them! The how-to-wash tag was the biggest piece of cloth on there.” KnowsMenLittlesSaidI CanHelpingUsedGrowing UpPiecesWifeGrowingHappenedDaughterMy WifePairsMiceFoldsUnderwearTagYour DaughterPantiesMinnieMinnie Mouse Author:Bill Engvall
“Well my wife and I just had a baby ourselves and it makes it harder to be on the road. It isn't for everybody and it can burn people out, and that's what's happened in the past. We've just kept the ship running y'know what I mean? You change engineers from time to time and as long as everybody coming aboard knows what direction the ship is, everything's alright.” PeopleKnowsWellsMeanLongRunningPastWifeHappenedBabyHarderMy WifeShipsEngineersAlright Author:Al Barr
“My wife asked me about that: "What happened to your beard?" I said, "What are you talking about?" She said, "Hey, the right side is shorter than the left." I said, "You gotta be kidding me." So I went in there and looked, and I combed it out and I said, "I don't know, that's just the way it grows."” KnowsWaySaidLeftGrowsSidesTalkingWifeHappenedMy WifeHeyBeard Author:Si Robertson
“I'd just written the book Ocean Of Sound, and this terrible thing happened in my life: my wife committed suicide. I was a single parent because of that; I was completely shattered. I had a book that I'd just finished that had been produced through a really, really terrible period, but I had managed to finish it.” BookParentSoundWifeWrittenHappenedPeriodsTerribleOceanSuicideCommittedMy WifeFinishedThings HappenTerrible ThingsShatteredSingle Parent Author:David Toop
“In my case what happened is that within about two weeks of beginning meditation, the anger already started to go away. My wife came to me and said, "What's going on?" and I said, "What are you talking about?" To which she replied, "This anger, where did it go?" I didn't even realize that my anger had been going away.” SaidTwoRealizingTalkingCasesMeditationWifeHappenedWeekMy WifeGoing AwayTwo Weeks Author:David Lynch