“To get a roaster clean, send something like baked apples in it to a neighbor. Neighbors always return pans spotless, and you won't have to use a blow torch on it like you usually do.” UseLike YouReturnCleanBlowNeighborApplesTorches Author:Phyllis Diller
“Daily there have to be many troubles and trials in every house, city, and country. No station in life is free of suffering and pain, both from your own, like your wife or children or household help or subjects, and from the outside, from your neighbors and all sorts of accidental trouble.” ChildrenCountryHelpingPainLife IsSufferingHouseCitiesWifeTroubleSubjectsLike YouNeighborTrialsStationsHouseholdSuffering And PainCity And Country Book:The sermon on the mount and the magnificat Source: The sermon on the mount and the magnificat
“You ever find yourself being lazy for no reason at all? Like, you pick up your mail, you go in your house, you realize you have a letter for a neighbor. You ever just look at the letter and go "Hm. Looks like they're never getting this. It'll take too much energy to go back outside. I'm gonna get that to them later on. Right now I gotta watch some 'Love Connection.' They got some new host on there."” LooksReasonHumorFunnyHouseEnergyRealizingWatchesToo MuchLike YouRight NowPicksLettersConnectionsNeighborLazyNo ReasonFinding YourselfHostMailBeing LazyLove Connection Author:Jim Gaffigan
“The great thing about civility is that it does not require you to agree with or approve of anything. You don't even have to love your neighbor to be civil. You just have to treat your neighbor the same way you would like your neighbor to treat your grandmother, or your child.” WayChildrenDoeLove YouLike YouTreatsOur ChildrenAgreeNeighborGreat ThingsYour ChildrenGrandmotherCivilityYour GrandmotherLove Your Neighbor Author:Barbara Brown Taylor
“People sometimes focus on the red button hot topic issues and I'm, like, you know, who cares about priestly celibacy? I'm thinking about how am I forgiving my enemies? How am I turning the other cheek? How am I loving my neighbor as myself? To me that's 10,000 times more difficult than to say should priests be married or not be married? I'm, like, I think we're wasting all out energies on the wrong thing. Let's work on the most difficult stuff.” PeopleThinkingKnowsShouldSometimesCareEnergyStuffDifficultEnemyIssuesFocusLike YouMarriedRedHotForgivingNeighborPriestsCheeksButtonsTopicsWho CaresBeing MarriedWrong ThingsCelibacyTurn The Other CheekHot Topic Author:Lino Rulli
“A long memory is the most subversive idea in America. A tautology is a thing which is tautological. A witty saying proves nothing, but saying something pointless gets people's attention. If your kids look like you, it's hereditory. If they look like the neighbor, it's the environment. Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.” PeopleIfsLooksLongIdeasKidsTodayAmericaMemoriesAttentionEnvironmentLike YouProveGolfWittyNeighborWealthyClothingsPointlessHideousProtestantsSubversiveOverweightTautologyWitty Sayings Author:Dave Barry
“As a citizen I felt appalled that we WENT TO WAR over faulty information - that felt false or at least "stretched" from the first time they started to push the idea that Iraq and 9/11 were connected, though they didn't seem to be and there was no logical reason for thinking they were. It's like your neighbors the Smiths burned your house down, and then the next day you retaliated by burning down the Jones' house.” ThinkingFirstsIdeasWarReasonSeemsNextHouseFeltInformationLike YouCitizensFirst TimeDown AndIraqConnectedNeighborBurningLogicalBurnedNext DayBurning Down Author:Christopher Durang
“If you find a neighbor in need, you're responsible for serving that neighbor in need, you're responsible for loving a neighbor just like you'd like to love yourself.” IfsNeedsLove YouLike YouResponsibleNeighborServingLove YourselfNeed You Author:George W. Bush
“We're close friends [with Brandy Burre]. We're neighbors. I actually lived two houses over from her for a while and then we were traveling one day and she was looking at the house we currently live in - which was between us - and she's like, "You guys should move here! It's bigger and better!"” ShouldTwoMovingGuyHouseLike YouOne DayBiggerNeighborClose FriendsBrandyBigger And Better Author:Robert Greene
“Serve your neighbors (like your next-door neighbors). It's a good way to get to know them better and show them what Jesus is about.” KnowsWayShowsNextJesusDoorsLike YouNeighborGood WayNext Door Neighbors Author:Matt Hammitt