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Pages Quotes

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Pages Quotes

“I wake up every morning at nine and grab for the morning paper. Then I look at the obituary page. If my name is not on it, I get up.”

“Upon looking back from the end of the last chapter and surveying the texture of what has been wrote, it is necessary, that upon this page and the five following, a good quantity of heterogeneous matter be inserted, to keep up that just balance betwixt wisdom and folly, without which a book would not hold together a single year.”

Years Has Beens Book Ends Matter Funny Together Lasts Five Balance Pages Surprise Following Folly Quantity Chapters Looking Back Texture

Book:The Works of Laurence Sterne, in One Volume

Source: The Works of Laurence Sterne, in One Volume

“If I wanted to be bored by 6,000 pages of unreadable dreck, I'd read War and Peace four times.”

Ifs War Humor Wanted Funny Four Pages Bored

Author:Lewis Black

“Every now and then I'll read a book, I'll be so proud of myself, I'll try and squeeze it into conversation. People will be like, "Hey Jim, how ya do-" "I read a book! Two hundred and fifty pages!" "That's great, what was it about?" "No idea! Took me three years!"”

People Trying Years Two Book Ideas Humor Funny Three Proud Conversation Pages Hundred Hey No Idea Fifty Three Years Now And Then Proud Of Myself

Author:Jim Gaffigan

“I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!”

World Humor Reality Funny Nations Air Tvs Pages Reality Tv Small World

Author:Kristen Schaal

“In a funny way, poems are suited to modern life. They're short, they're intense. Nobody has time to read a 700-page book. People read magazines, and a poem takes less time than an article.”

People Way Book Funny Modern Pages Intense Magazines Articles Modern Life

Author:Caroline Kennedy

“I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done.”

Writing Book Done Humor Funny Numbers Pages Humorous Witty Crafts Writing A Book

Author:Steven Wright