“I think Helen of Troy must have been pretty hot. She got two countries going crazy for 10 years over her.” ThinkingYearsHas BeensTwoCountryCrazyHotHelenGoing CrazyTwo CountriesHelen Of Troy Author:Colin Quinn
“I'm just another guy who thinks he's smarter than he is, in a long line of them.” ThinkingLongGuyLinesSmarterOther GuysLong Lines Author:Colin Quinn
“I think I identify more with the smart guy, but most people might take umbrage at that. I like to think of myself as a real thinker, but I suppose people might beg to differ.” PeopleThinkingRealMightGuySmartThinkerSmart Guy Author:Colin Quinn
“The Senate was holding hearings on deceptive sweepstakes practices. These companies target the elderly, making them think they're going to get a bunch of money, when in reality they never see any of it. The most popular of these scams is called Social Security.” ThinkingRealitySocialCompanyPracticeSecurityHearingBunchTargetSenateSocial SecurityElderlyDeceptiveScamsSweepstakes Author:Colin Quinn
“I think people tend to feel odd when I do my act. Unless you are an ironic person, it's not a good place for you to be.” PeopleThinkingFeelsPersonsFunnyOddIronicGood Place Author:Colin Quinn
“I think everyone should own six guns, even though I don't own any.” ThinkingShouldSixGun Author:Colin Quinn
“I think if you try to tailor your act to anybody, you end up with an act that doesn't work anyway.” IfsThinkingTryingEndsTailors Author:Colin Quinn
“The mistake that people make in stand-up is thinking they're profound or they're deep when there are so many people who have more worthwhile ways of phrasing things.” PeopleThinkingWayMistakeProfoundWorthwhile Author:Colin Quinn
“You can’t make everybody laugh. You gotta just do what you think is funny. Just be obstreperous to everybody.” ThinkingFunnyLaughing Author:Colin Quinn
“You know how it is with writing. You just write what you want to write. There's no way to predict what is good or bad. You just do what you think is funny, and either it works or you're finished. It's impossible to predict anything.” ThinkingKnowsWayWantWritingFunnyKnow HowImpossibleFinishedWhat You Want Author:Colin Quinn
