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Hope Edelman

Hope Edelman Books

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“While the daughter of a helpless father develops a hypercompetent physical self-reliance that encourages her to take responsibility for those around her, the daughter of a distant father becomes more emotionally independent. As an adult, she's wary of depending on others; feeling physically abandoned by one parent and emotionally abandoned by the other, she selects only a handful of people to whom she'll get close.”

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Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“Grief needs an outlet. Creativity offers one. Some psychiatrists see mourning and creativity as the perfect marriage, the thought processes of one neatly complementing the other. A child’s contradictory impulses to both acknowledge and deny a parent’s death represents precisely the type of rich ambiguity that inspires artistic expression.”

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Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“The mother who abandons her daughter leaves a pile of questions behind: Who was she? Where is she? Why did she leave? Like the child whose mother dies, the abandoned daughter lives with a loss, but she also struggles with the knowledge that her mother is alive yet inaccessible and out of touch. Death has a finality that abandonment simply does not.”

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Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“A daughter whose mother chose to leave her or was incapable of mothering may feel like a member of the emotional underclass, like a dispensable part of society whose needs the government has ignored. As a result, she often develops a sense of devaluation and unworthiness even more profound than that of the daughter whose mother has died.”

LossValuableSelf WorthAbandonmentWorthinessEstrangementSelf ValueUnworthinessMotherless DaughtersDevaluation
Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“When the loss of a mother results in family chaos or feelings of abandonment, even the risk of subsequent loss can cause anxiety in the child and inspire behaviors designed to preserve the status quo. As the child matures, this anxiety may extend to concerns beyond and unrelated to the original loss, turning her into an adult who has difficulty making decisions out of fear of catastrophic results. Taking chances may feel too risky to her, and instead she seeks safety through controlling whatever aspects of her life she can.”

FearLossRiskAnxietySafetyDecision MakingAbandonmentMotherless Daughters
Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“There is an emptiness inside of me -- a void that will never be filled. No one in your life will ever love you as your mother does. There is no love as pure, unconditional and strong as a mother's love. And I will never be loved that way again.”

WayDoeMotherStrongLove YouPureFilledEmptinessVoidUnconditionalNo LoveMother's LoveEmptiness Inside
Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss, 20th Anniversary Edition
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“I truly believe that the death of my mother has made me the way I am today. I am a survivor, mentally strong, determined, stronwilled, self-reliant, and independent. I also keep most of my pain, anger and feelings inside. I refuse to be vulnerable to anyone, especially my husband. The only people who see that more emotional or softer side are my children. That too because of my mother.”

PeopleWayBelieveChildrenMadeSelfFeelingsTodayPainMotherStrongSidesEmotionalHusbandIndependentRefuseDeterminedVulnerableMy ChildrenMy HusbandSurvivorSelf ReliantMentally Strong
Author:Hope Edelman
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“The degree to which a surviving parent copes is the most important indicator of the child's long-term adaptation. Kids whose surviving parents are unable to function effectively in the parenting role show more anxiety and depression, as well as sleep and health problems, than those whose parents have a strong support network and solid inner resources to rely on.”

WellsChildrenLongImportantShowsProblemKidsStrongParentTermSleepRolesSupportDegreesAnxietyResourcesFunctionLong TermRelyAdaptationSurvivingIndicatorsHealth Problems
Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss, 20th Anniversary Edition
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“a mother's death also means the loss of the consistent, supportive family system that once supplied her with a secure home base, she then has to develop her self-confidence and self-esteem through alternate means. Without a mother or mother-figure to guide her, a daughter also has to piece together a female self-image of her own.”

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Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss
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“When a daughter loses a mother, the intervals between grief responses lengthen over time, but her longing never disappears. It always hovers at the edge of her awareness, prepared to surface at any time, in any place, in the least expected ways.”

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Book:Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss, 20th Anniversary Edition
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“Rachel Resnick's story of love lost and love sought cracks open the timeworn addiction narrative to release something raw, probing, brave, and redemptive. The courage it took to write this story is challenged only by the courage it must have taken to live it. I sit in awe of such unflinching honesty. LOVE JUNKIE is memoir at its very best.”

WritingStoriesLostTakenHonestyAnd LoveBraveAddictionMemoirReleaseNarrativeAweCracksLost LoveJunkieProbingHonesty Love
Author:Hope Edelman
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“I am fooling only myself when I say that my mother exists now only in the photographs on my bulletin board or in the outline of my hand or in the armful of memories I still hold tight. She lives on beneath everything I do. Her presence influenced who I was and her absence influences who I am. Our lives are shaped as much by those who leave us as they are by those who stay. Loss is our legacy. Insight is our gift. Memory is our guide.”

StillsHandsMotherMemoriesLossExistenceFamilyOur LivesInfluenceMomPhotographyLeavingPhotographInsightGuidesAbsenceWho I AmLegacyBoardsStayingOutlinesPeople In Your LifeLosing SomeoneInspirational DeathInspirational FamilyBulletin Board
Author:Hope Edelman
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