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Famous Maureen Brady Quotes

“When shame is met with compassion and not received as confirmation of our guilt, we can begin to see how slant a lens it has had us looking through. That awareness lets us step back far enough to see that if we can let it go, we will see ourselves as clean where we once thought we were dirty. We will remember our innocence. We will see how our shame supported a system in which the perpetrators were protected and we bore the brunt of their offense — first in its actuality, then again in carrying their shame for it. If the method we chose to try to beat out shame was perfectionism, we can relax now, shake the burden off our shoulders, and give ourselves a chance to loosen up and make some errors. Hallelujah! Our freedom will not come from tireless effort and getting it all exactly right.”

FreedomHealingShameGuiltRecoveryInnocenceImperfectOffenseSexual AbusePerfectionismChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsAbusersPerpetratorsChild RapeHealing From AbuseRecovery From AbuseAbuserInnocence LostPerfectly ImperfectBurdens Of The PastFalse GuiltPeptrator
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
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“Even if our survival skills have become impediments we would like to let go of because they have ceased to serve us, we can still love ourselves with them. In appreciation of our survival, we can be awed at how our resources brought us through, even when these resources were things like indifference, a wall of rage, a cold heart…We learn to embrace ourselves as humans with faults and problems.”

HealingSurvivalEmpowermentRageRecoverySurvivorSelf AcceptanceChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsSurvivorsHealing InsightsChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorSelf Acceptance QuotesSurvival SkillsSurvivorshipValuing Yourself
Author:Maureen Brady
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“When we are ready to let go of our old controls, we admit that we were powerless over the incest or abuse...We have often thought, 'If only I could have stopped it,' but we could not have stopped it. We let go of the 'if only' now and sit still with our stark powerlessness…In our surrender to powerlessness, we touch ourselves with the gift of truth.”

TruthHealingLetting GoAbuseSurvivorChild AbusePowerlessChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsPowerlessnessIncestSurvivors Of AbuseAbuse RecoveryChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorIf OnlySurvivor Of Abuse
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
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“Our need to be "greater than" or "less than" has been a defense against toxic shame. A shameful act was committed upon us. The perpetrator walked away, leaving us with the shame. We absorbed the notion that we are somehow defective. To cover for this we constructed a false self, a masked self. And it is this self that is the overachiever or the dunce, the tramp or the puritan, the powermonger or the pathetic loser.”

HealingShameAshamedSurvivorLoserTrue SelfChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsPuritanIncestDefectiveHealing InsightsFeeling BadChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorRecovery From AbuseOverachieverCoverupToxic ShameFalse SelfPower TripHidden PainDunceDefective HumansHidden FeelingsHidden Self
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
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“Power is confusing for us, perhaps even terrifying, because our relationship with it had an unfortunate beginning. Someone in a position of power over us used and abused us…It seems as if power were something to be wielded, always at someone’s expense, usually our own.”

HealingPowerAbuseSurvivorChild AbusePowerlessChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsPowerlessnessAbuse Of PowerChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorMisuse Of PowerParental AuthoritySurvivor Of AbuseAbuse Of AuthorityAbusive ParentingAbuse Of Trust
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
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“In order to survive our youth, many of us became sensitized to which conditions we had to play to, to receive attention. No wonder we mistook this attention for love. We thought love came in finite quantities—it had to be competed for among siblings, or it had to be paid for with exacting dues.”

HealingSurvivorChild AbuseEmotional AbuseChild Sexual AbuseCompetitivenessHealing InsightsUnlovedChild Sexual Abuse SurvivorChild Abuse SurvivorEmotional NeglectConditional LoveParental NeglectSurvival Mechanism
Author:Maureen Brady
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“The bridge out of shame is outrage. Suddenly the obvious becomes stunningly clear—we have been carrying shame for the crime of the offender…In a clear flash we may see ourselves standing in a fierce stance, grounded by our knowledge, ready to throw off any wrongdoer. Our outrage can be a fueling energy, capable of making us as steely as we need to be.”

HealingCrimeShameRageRecoveryRapeOutrageChild Sexual AbuseAbuse SurvivorsIncestHealing InsightsChild RapeHealing From AbuseRecovery From Abuse
Book:Beyond Survival: A Writing Journey for Healing Childhood Sexual Abuse
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