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Quote by Dave Barry

“Whatever the needs of the public are, the government responds to those needs by getting larger.”

Quote by Dave Barry

Book:Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway

Work

Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway

Dave Barry Hits Below the Beltway is a compilation of essays by the renowned humorist Dave Barry, focusing on his observations and commentary on American politics and political life. The book offers a witty and often irreverent perspective on the political landscape, exploring various events and figures with Barry's characteristic humor and sarcasm. more

Author

Dave Barry is a renowned American humorist, born on July 3, 1947. His works are known for their unique humor style and satirical observations of everyday life. more

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“Why can't Americans do their own taxes? Because the federal Tax Code is out of control, that's why. It's gigantic and insanely complex, and it gets worse all the time. Nobody has ever read the whole thing. IRS workers are afraid to go into the same ROOM with it.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“We're wild horses. We're going to eat your food, knock down your tent and poop on your shoes. We're protected by federal law, just like Richard Nixon.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“I played lead guitar in a band called The Federal Duck, which is the kind of name that was popular in the '60s as a result of controlled substances being in widespread use. Back then, there were no restrictions, in terms of talent, on who could make an album, so we made one, and it sounds like a group of people who have been given powerful but unfamiliar instruments as a therapy for a degenerative nerve disease.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“I have come up with a sure-fire concept for a hit television show, which would be called `A Live Celebrity Gets Eaten by a Shark'.”

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Book:Dave Barry's Greatest Hits

Source: Dave Barry's Greatest Hits

“Rembrandt's first name was Beauregard, which is why he never used it.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“If Congress were to pass a 'flat' tax, you'd simply pay a fixed percentage of your income, and you wouldn't have to fill out any complicated forms, and there would be no loopholes for politically connected groups, and normal people would actually understand the tax laws, and giant talking broccoli stalks would come around and mow your lawn for free, because Congress is NOT going to pass a flat tax, you pathetic fool.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“As Americans we must always remember that we all have a common enemy, an enemy that is dangerous, powerful, and relentless. I refer, of course, to the federal government.”

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Author:Dave Barry

“Back then, the entire Internet consisted of two slow, boxcar-sized UNIVAC computers about 50 feet apart, connected by a wire. It would take one of these computers an entire day to send an email to the other one, which would immediately delete it, because it was a Viagra ad.”

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“Today's scientific question is: What in the world is electricity? And where does it go after it leaves the toaster?”

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Author:Dave Barry

“I’ve noticed that one thing about parents is that no matter what stage your child is in, the parents who have older children always tell you the next stage is worse.”

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Author:Dave Barry