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Email Quotes

“You know that when your partner deletes their messages to a past lover after being accused of cheating, then it is likely that they were being unfaithful in some way.”

WayLovePastComputerMessagesLettersNotesAffairPartnersInstantRemoveCheatingPartnershipCheatLoverEmailBeingAccusedKnowEraseLetterOldPartnerFacebookFlameUnfaithfulMessageAffairsCheaterTheySomeUnfaithfulnessProbablyMessengerThenNoteRemovedLikelyAccuseProbableDeleteAffairs Of HeartFriends With BenefitsErasedPartner AbusePartnershipsDeletedImUnfaithful Partner
Author:Steven Magee
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“Don’t pretend to be my friend At the beginning of the pandemic, I got a flurry of emails from companies and stores who were all very keen to be my friend and help get me through these tough times. The CEO of Woolworths started emailing me personally and including a picture of himself. ‘Dear Kitty,’ he wrote, before going on to tell me all sorts of tales about the crazy capers the Woolies staff had been up to that I can’t quite remember (he did get on a bit, I think he might have been lonely). Furniture store West Elm also emailed to say they had my back. Thanks, guys! Specifically, they wrote: ‘Whether it’s keeping the kids entertained or getting creative in the kitchen, West Elm is here to help.’ I was delighted. I wrote back to let them know I didn’t have an kids but that I could sure use a new sofa given that I was doing a lot more sitting on my arse these days. Maybe my email went to their junk folder, I don’t know, but I never did hear back from them.”

HumourMarketingEmail
Book:More Rules for Life: A special volume for enthusiasts
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“SUBJECT: NEXT TIME You Jackasses Throw an 'Unofficial' Bonfire ... How about making sure that you won't burn down the grounds in the process?! How about ASKING your neighbors if they'll mind having five hundred students in their streets until three in the morning? I know damn well that this was not a "team" idea and whenever KYLE and GRAYSON want to own up to this shit, I'll reduce the extra five daily miles you all now owe me, to three miles. I'm waiting. --Coach Whitten __________________________ SUBJECT: RE: NEXT TIME You Jackasses Throw an 'Unofficial' Bonfire ... It was me, Coach. Grayson had nothing to do with it this time. He didn't even show up. Speaking of which-- Dude, where were you? I fucked like three girls from the bonfire. You probably could've hooked up with at least five. I don't think I'll need another blowjob for a month after how amazing these were. PS--Are you back at our apartment yet? I need to tell you these stories in person when Coach isn't acting like this shit is a big deal. --Kyle ___________________________ SUBJECT: RE RE: NEXT TIME You Jackasses Throw an 'Unofficial' Bonfire ... Kyle, Meet me in my office at the complex NOW. --Coach Whitten _____________________ SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: NEXT TIME You Jackasses Throw an 'Unofficial' Bonfire ... I meant to send that last part to just Grayson. Not to you, Coach. Can I come in a few hours? I mean, now that you've read what I said, surely you understand how exhausted I am. Three girls, Coach, THREE. --Kyle ________________________________ SUBJECT: RE: RE: RE: RE: NEXT TIME You Jackasses Throw an 'Unofficial' Bonfire ... Right. Fucking. NOW. --Coach Whitten”

EmailBonfireKyle
Book:On a Tuesday
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“Subject: Sundown Date: June 14 2011 09:35 To: Christian Grey Dear Completely & Utterly Smitten I love waking up with you, too. But I love being in bed with you and in elevators and on pianos and billiard tables and boats and desks and showers and bathtubs and strange wooden crosses with shackles and four poster beds with red satin sheets and boathouses and childhood bedrooms. Yours Sex Mad and Insatiable xx”

HumorChristianFunnySexEmailChristian GreyAnaAnastasiaFifty Shades Of GreyE L JamesFifty Shades Darker
Book:Fifty Shades Darker
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“When you've got your devices down to the ideal number, use these tips to minimize them and prevent distractions: - Remove as many icons from your desktop as possible. - Uninstall software you don't need. - Delete unneeded files from your Documents folder. (If you don't want to delete them completely, at least move them to an archive folder so they don't clutter your most-used folder anymore.) - Develop a simple but logical folder structure so that you can find documents you want easily. - Unsubscribe to blogs, email newsletters, and advertisements that no longer serve your interests. - Delete internet bookmarks, cookies, and temporary internet files you no longer need. - Delete apps you don't need, remembering that if you need them later, you can always download them again. Put only your most crucial apps (such as your calendar and your phone) on your home screen. Put the rest in folders on your second screen. - Turn off notifications, including social media push notifications and email audio alerts. - Make sure your spam filters are working. - Delete photos that are of poor quality or that you don't need. - Delete unused music and movies. - Subscribe to a password manager so that you don't have to keep track of a bunch of passwords.”

Social MediaDevicesEmailAppsElectronicsPhoneMinimizing
Book:The Minimalist Home: A Room-by-Room Guide to a Decluttered, Refocused Life
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“Most people haven't been to Paris at all." "Not unless you're counting Paris, Texas." "Or Paris, Illinois." "Paris, Maine," Neil countered. "Paris, Idaho," I added with a nod. "And Paris, Arkansas." "There's a Paris, Arkansas?" Neil asked, eyebrows high. "Yup. Kentucky, too. And a couple others..." "How do you know this?" "A potent blend of Where in America Is Carmen Sandiego?, curiosity, and the Internet." "Who said technology never offered anything useful?" "I'm guessing victims of e-mail scams.”

United StatesParisEmailSpam
Book:Reservations for Two
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“Electronic mail systems can, if used by many people, cause severe information overload problems. The cause of this problem is that it is so easy to send a message to a large number of people, and that systems are often designed to give the sender too much control of the communication process, and the receiver too little control…. People get too many messages, which they do not have time to read. This also means that the really important messages are difficult to find in the large flow of less important messages. In the future, when we get larger and larger message systems, and these systems get more and more interconnected, this will be a problem for almost all users of these systems.”

Social MediaEmail1984SpamInformation Overload2011New News Every Day
Book:The Information: A History, a Theory, a Flood
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