“We need to pull over now," she screeched as she gagged. "Paper is not supposed to be made out of poop.”
"Did it taste like poop?" Hank inquired as he quickly pulled into a rest stop filled with church buses.
"Since I don't eat poop," Dima snapped, "I wouldn't know."
"But you do eat people?"
"I do not eat people," she yelled.
"But your people eat people?" I prodded nicely.
"Occasionally," she hissed. "And your people sniff each other's asses when in animal form..."
She had a point - and a foul one at that.”
Quote by Robyn Peterman
“When Johnny Depp said he found poop all over his bed, I got embarrassed, thinking my ducks had broken into his house and used his sheets like a garden. But boy was I relieved when he placed the blame on Amber Heard, where it properly belongs.”
Source: Ducks are the stars of the karaoke bird world
“Life is nothin but poop, so eat lots of beans.... And prunes”
“Don’t you just hate it when you step in dog poop? Especially if you’re walking with a friend, and as you smell it and the stench keeps pace with you, you begin to wonder if your friend shit his pants. Thankfully, what comes out of a duck’s anus looks more like coffee, and fills your nostrils like yesterday’s news.”
Source: One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
“Starbucks coffee tastes like watery duck poop. I mean it probably does, because it’s not like I’ve ever drank something so gross. But I have tried duck poop.”
Source: One Out of Ten Dentists Agree: This Book Helps Fight Gingivitis. Maybe Tomorrow I’ll Ask Nine More Dentists.: A BearPaw Duck And Meme Farm Production
“Toilet paper is like an unreliable bridge, you are gonna have to walk across mud valley from time to time.”
Source: 94,000 Wasps in a Trench Coat
“Humanure composters can stand under the stars at night gazing at the heavens, and know that, when nature calls, their excretions will not foul the planet.”
Source: The Humanure Handbook: A Guide to Composting Human Manure
“You know your poop is heading in the right direction when you are clean wiping!”
“History is always written by the winner and they think their shit don't stink.”
Source: Lucifer's Emblem
“Toddlers are like the worst inmates. When they're not lying to your face and tearing up your shit, they're napping, pooping, or trying to think of different ways to fuck with you.”
“There’s a reason Martha Stewart raises chickens and not ducks. Ducks consume a lot of food and water, and it all has to go somewhere. To put it plainly, these fowl produce copious amounts of wet droppings that have a truly unpleasant odor.”
Source: Ducks: Tending a Small-Scale Flock for Pleasure and Profit (CompanionHouse Books) Choosing the Right Breeds, Housing, Diet, Breeding, Duckling Care, Health, Handling, & Egg Harvesting