“You have to have funny faces and words, you can't just have words. It is a powerful thing, and I think that's why it's hard for people to imagine that women can do that, be that powerful.” PeopleThinkingHardHumorFunnyFacesCan DoPowerfulImagineHaving FunImagine ThatFunny Face Author:Ellen DeGeneres
“Has anyone seen me on Letterman? Two million people watch that show and I don't know where they are. You might have seen this next comedian on the Late Show, but I think more people have seen me at the store. That should be my introduction. "You might have seen this next comedian at the store," and people would say "Hell yes I have!"” PeopleThinkingKnowsShouldTwoShowsHumorMightFunnyNextWatchesMillionsHellLateStoresComedianHaving FunIntroductionLetterman Author:Mitch Hedberg
“I saw a commercial for an above-ground pool, it was 30 seconds long. Because that's the maximum amount of time you can picture yourself having fun in an above-ground pool. If it was 31 seconds, the actor would say "The water is only up to here? What do I do now? Throw the ball back to Jimmy? Or put some goggles on and look at his feet?"” IfsLooksLongHumorFunnyActorsFunWaterSawsFeetAmountBallsHaving FunSecondsPoolMaximumJimmyGoggles Author:Mitch Hedberg
“As an adult, I'm not supposed to go down slides. So if I'm at the top of a slide, I have to pretend that I got there accidentally. "How the hell did I get up here? I guess I have to slide down. Whee!" That's what you say when you're having fun. You refer to yourself and some other people.” PeopleIfsHumorFunnyFunHellAdultsGet UpHaving FunSlides Author:Mitch Hedberg
“Ozzie Smith just made another play that I've never seen anyone else make before, and I've seen him make it more often than anyone else ever has.” MadePlayHumorFunnyBaseballHaving Fun Author:Jerry Coleman
“Now, this is the fun part about getting stoned. They get stoned, then they become paranoid. Now, when they started out, they said, "Let's get high and have fun." So they're high; now they're paranoid. "Am I falling out of this chair?"” SaidHumorFunnyFallFunHaving FunChairsThey SaidParanoidGetting High Author:Bill Cosby