“Well, I always say that the two things I was most disastrous at in my life, being a teenager and being a wife, were the two things I really wound up cashing in on when I was writing fluffy magazine pieces.” WritingWellsTwoPiecesWifeWoundsMagazinesTeenagerTwo ThingsFluffyBeing A Teenager Author:Ann Patchett
“I argue with wife over what little pieces of real estate investments we should try to pay on and hold, and which to let go back. We always said, "Put it in land, and you can always walk on it." We did, but no buyers would walk on it with us.” ShouldTryingLittlesSaidRealWalksPayPiecesWifeLandLetting GoInvestmentArguingEstatesBuyers Book:Will Rogers' Weekly Articles: The Harding Source: Will Rogers' Weekly Articles: The Harding
“A man may be capable, as Jack Ketch's wife said of his servant, of a plain piece of work, a bare hanging; but to makea malefactordiesweetly was only belonging toher husband.” MenMaySaidPiecesWifeHusbandCapableServantBelonging Author:John Dryden
“I am to gratify his pleasure and nurse his child, I am a piece of household furniture, I am a woman.” ChildrenPleasurePiecesWifeNurseHouseholdFurniture Author:Sophia Tolstaya
“The best piece of advice I received before I got married was, "Be careful what you say when you're in a fight, because it could stick in someone's head." I don't think I've ever said anything I really regretted. I'm very sympathetic to women. I've really studied wife-ology, and I know you've got to figure out the feelings. Deal with the feelings.” ThinkingKnowsSaidFeelingsFightingDealsPiecesWifeAdviceFiguresMarriedSticksCarefulBe CarefulSympatheticCareful What You Say Author:Jerry Seinfeld
“Lincoln Chafee, former governor of Rhode Island, announced he's running for president. Before he announced he's running, his wife went on Facebook and asked his staff if they remembered his password. Because if a Facebook password is too hard to remember, the launch codes for the nukes should be a piece of cake.” IfsShouldHardRunningRememberPresidentPiecesWifeFormerCodeRememberedIslandsCakeGovernorsStaffPasswordsNukesRhode Island Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Would it not grieve a woman to be over-mastered by a piece of valiant dust? to make an account of her life to a clod of wayward marle?” PiecesWifeAccountsDustGrievingValiantBenedick Author:William Shakespeare
“Oh, the foghorns... even the foghorns, they're all brass. It's something by Ingrid Marshal called Fog Tropes. It's not a sound effect. It's an actual piece of music. If you listen to what's going on after he has a flashback about his wife you'll hear... it sounds like the humpback whales in a way. But it's all music. And we use it again later, too.” IfsWayUseSoundPiecesWifeEffectsFogWhalesBrassTropesFlashbackSound EffectsHumpback Whales Author:Martin Scorsese
“I could go out to five parties a day if I wanted to. I don't. I have attachments to my wife and kids - and about 20 pieces of art.” IfsArtKidsWantedPartyFivePiecesWifeMy WifeAttachmentMy Wife And Kids Author:Aby Rosen
“God, she's growing up, and I don't know when it happened, man. I used to buy her Minnie Mouse panties and little Winnie the Pooh underwear. I was helping my wife fold cloths. I picked up a pair of skimpy underwear. I looked at my wife and said: "When you gonna wear these for me?" She goes, "I can't. They're your daughter's." "Aaaaaaahhhhhh! No, No, No!" There was nothing to them! The how-to-wash tag was the biggest piece of cloth on there.” KnowsMenLittlesSaidI CanHelpingUsedGrowing UpPiecesWifeGrowingHappenedDaughterMy WifePairsMiceFoldsUnderwearTagYour DaughterPantiesMinnieMinnie Mouse Author:Bill Engvall
“Great soul of Gandhi, cover your ears. You will not want to hear this! Listen, you inbred piece of Ku Klux Krap! You white people love to be racist, but the only races you can tell apart are Indianapolis and Daytona. I hope I am reincarnated as toothpaste, so I never have to see you again. Now take your twelve-pack of wife-beating juice and get the park out of my store!” PeopleWantSoulWhiteRacePiecesWifeEarsStoresParksRacistOver YouTwelvePacksJuiceYou AgainGreat SoulsToothpasteIndianapolisInbredsDaytonaWife Beating Author:Carlos Mencia