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Puns Quotes

Browse 62 quotes about Puns.

Puns Quotes

“Hey,” Nick grunted. “Marriage is just a word for some people, but for others it’s a fucking sentence, okay?” Zane was holding his side. “Oh my God, marriage puns! Oh my God...” Nick was trying not to grin, but he finally couldn’t help himself. “Once we established I was the victim, then we had to find a girl with a ring on her finger to figure out which one I’d fucking married.” Ty leaned against Zane’s arm, laughing so hard he could no longer sit up straight. “The look on his face!” “He made a marriage pun,” Zane gasped.”

Humor Ty Grady Puns Nick O Flaherty Zane Garett

Book:Ball & Chain

Source: Ball & Chain

“I’m pretty sure that wasn’t there before,” Nick grumbled. Kelly laughed harder. “I’m pretty sure it was.” “Shut up.” “You’re high.” “Oh, look at the pothead calling the kettle names,” Nick said in a singsong voice as he settled onto the wide chaise beside Kelly.”

Humour Puns Nick O Flaherty Kelly Abbott

Book:Shock & Awe

Source: Shock & Awe

“I’ll take her no mistake no mister no missed her no mist no miss no me no.”

Deconstruction Puns Differance Posmodernism

Author:Caryl Churchill

“I said never mix business with pleasure. They said it was a pleasure doing business with me.”

Bullshit Humourous Puns Satire Write

Author:Nikhil Sharda

“‬"Which‬‭ one‬‭ of‬‭ you‬‭ first?"‬‭ the‬‭ Lion‬‭ challenged.‬ "I'll‬‭ fight‬‭ you.‬‭ Both‬‭ together‬‭ if‬‭ you‬‭ want.‬‭ I'll‬‭ fight‬‭ you‬‭ on‬ one..." He paused dramatically, raising a paw, "foot."‬ Dorothy frowned. "Why the long pause?"‬ The‬‭ Lion‬‭ glanced‬‭ at‬‭ his‬‭ paws.‬‭ "I‬‭ don’t‬‭ know—I‬ was‬‭ born‬‭ with‬‭ them!"‬”

Paws Pause Puns

Book:We're Off

Source: We're Off

“Ich muss nicht während des Urlaubs ins Ausland fahren. Ich fühle mich auch schon hier fremd.”

Puns Reisen Fremdheit Urlaub

Book:Die Flächenmaus und wie sie nicht aussieht

Source: Die Flächenmaus und wie sie nicht aussieht

“Time has the greatest number of followers —including those who walk ahead of it.”

Author:Nkwachukwu Ogbuagu

“Well, land sakes!" Hiro says. "Lookee here!" He whips his blade sideways, cutting off both of the businessman's forearms, causing the sword to clatter onto the floor. "Better fire up the ol' barbeque, Jemima!" Hiro continues, whipping the sword around sideways, cutting the businessman's body in half just above the navel. Then he leans down so he's looking right into the businessman's face. "Didn't anyone tell you," he says, losing the dialect, "that I was a hacker?" Then he hacks the guy's head off.”

Humor Puns Decapitation

Book:Snow Crash

Source: Snow Crash

“Would I laugh?" "Matter of fact, you would," says Zeb. "Heart like shale. What you need is a good fracking.”

Funny Pun Puns Fracking Shale

Book:MaddAddam

Source: MaddAddam

“In the desert you always need water,' [Selethen] told [Horace]. 'A wise traveller never goes past a chance to refill his water skins.' 'Is there nowhere else they could do this?' Halt asked. Selethen tapped another mark into the sand with his dagger. 'There are the Orr-San Wells, he said. 'They're smaller and not as reliable.”

Humour Puns Orson Welles Rangers Apprentice

Book:Erak's Ransom

Source: Erak's Ransom

“I HOLD TO THE 'NAUGHTY' IN ANY TUG-OF-WAR”

Puns Tug Of War Argument Quotes Knot Of Love Puns About Knots

Book:The Fearless Moral Inventory of Elsie Finch

Source: The Fearless Moral Inventory of Elsie Finch

“Rules for navigating the net, Or people will roll their eye Lest you can't roll the R rect: Literally, don´t dink and dive!”

Source: ACross Tic