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Howard Stern

Howard Stern Quotes

Radio personality

Howard Stern, born on January 12, 1954, is a renowned radio personality. Known for his unique sense of humor and candid talk show content, he is highly recognized in the broadcasting industry.

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Famous Howard Stern Quotes

“You've got to be a little vicious. You've got to be narcissistic. You've got to be on fire about your career.”

Littles Careers Fire Burning Vicious Narcissistic

Author:Howard Stern

“It's okay for a man to commit adultery if his wife is ugly.”

Ifs Men Wife Okay Ugly Commit Adultery Committing Adultery

Author:Howard Stern

“Don't let the government win.”

Government Winning

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm in a war, a cultural war.”

Author:Howard Stern

“Rick Shapiro is a top comedian.”

Author:Howard Stern

“Please, with the God talk. Hate to break it to you, but there is no God.”

Hate Break Atheism Please Positive Atheism Madmen There Is No God Mad Men

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm down with just the Backstreet Boys.”

Boys Backstreet Backstreet Boys

Author:Howard Stern

“Relationships are based on trust until you meet someone new.”

Author:Howard Stern

“Mike Walker is the Hemingway of gossip.”

Gossip Mike Walkers

Author:Howard Stern

“Why be uptight about bowel movements and sex? We all have sex. We all have penises -- except for those of us who have vaginas.”

Sex Movement Uptight Bowel Movements

Author:Howard Stern

“I really didn't know much about the Libertarians. I knew they were for less government and more individual freedom. I liked that.”

Knows Government Individual Libertarian Individual Freedom

Author:Howard Stern

“I was told David Letterman and Kaufman had heart attacks on the same day: David Letterman's heart attack was at a hospital in NYC. Kaufman's heart attack was at the red light district in Amsterdam, Holland. I think Kaufman had more fun. You're a great artist. I just love the way you painted my portrait.”

Thinking Way Heart Light Artist Fun Red Hospitals Portraits Great Art Great Artist Heart Attack Holland Nyc Amsterdam Red Lights Letterman

Author:Howard Stern

“There are a lot of so-called "good Americans" who are really a bunch of bums.”

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm trapped inside of me and I don't go out at all. I go to bed at eight o'clock at night. I never go out during the week. I'm in psychotherapy four days a week, pretty heavy commitment to it.”

Night Four Week Bed Commitment Heavy Eight Clock Trapped Psychotherapy

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm going to take over the world. Everyone watch out, you're in big trouble.”

World Bigs Watches Trouble

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm a parent, and I regulate what my kids listen to. I don't need the government to be the parent. If I'm a crappy parent, then I need the government involved.”

Ifs Needs Government Kids Parent Involved

Author:Howard Stern

“I can't imagine the biggest blow to me was that marriage not working out. That just flipped me out.”

I Can Imagine Blow Work Out Flipped

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm a believer that satellite radio, whether I'm on it or not, will take off.”

Radio Believer Satellites

Author:Howard Stern

“You have to make a decision, what you want to do in life, ... Your deal can be, you can leave tomorrow. Soon as you leave, you will be forgotten.”

Want Decision Deals Tomorrow Forgotten What You Want Be You

Author:Howard Stern

“I will always be mad at someone. That will never go away.”

Mad Going Away Mad At Someone

Author:Howard Stern

“I think I could create a cult, no problem. The hard part is getting people to kill themselves.”

People Thinking Hard Problem Cult No Problem

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm at a point in my career, I've been around a long time now, over 35 years in broadcasting. I don't worry about much. I respect what America's Got Talent is. It is a family show. It is a show that I love.”

Years Long Shows America Careers Worry Talent Long Time Broadcasting

Author:Howard Stern

“I've always been about honesty, whether on the radio, whether I did a movie, whether I wrote a book. As long as you're honest, you don't lose your edge.”

Long Book Loses Honest Honesty Edges Radio

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm sure some people might be offended by that, but this is my feeling about show business. It's not all about pure talent. There are certain people who command a stage because they look good ,like me.”

People Looks Shows Feelings Might Certain Stage Talent Pure Like Me Command Offended Show Business

Author:Howard Stern

“We all get one life to live here. It's 2012, and for gay and lesbian couples who are in love, not to be able to be married is so absurd.”

Able Couple Gay Married Absurd Being Married One Life To Live

Author:Howard Stern

“There's just too many people being bullied, too many people's lives being wrecked. This is something that is long overdue. We all have gay and lesbian people in our families, and these are good people.”

People Long Gay Our Family Good People Bullied Overdue Being Bullied

Author:Howard Stern

“These nutbags, like Santorum and Bachmann, who make these people and especially young gay kids feel miserable, shame on them. They're quacks. I would never vote for them. I wouldn't even listen to them because there but for the grace of God go they.”

People Feels Kids Young Grace Gay Vote Shame Miserable Grace Of God Quacks

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm sickened by all religions. Religion has divided people. I don't think there's any difference between the pope wearing a large hat and parading around with a smoking purse and an African painting his face white and praying to a rock.”

People Thinking Faces Differences White Atheism Rocks Painting Praying Atheist Smoking Hats Divided Pope Purses

Author:Howard Stern

“I still feel like I gotta prove something. There are a lot of people hoping I fail. But I like that. I need to be hated.”

People Inspirational Needs Feels Stills Success Failing Self Esteem Prove Hated Insightful

Author:Howard Stern

“Okay, well, I guess I'm still a kid. Because when I get really angry and fired up and I feel like my back is up against the wall, I will say vicious things.”

Feels Wells Stills Kids Wall Okay Angry Vicious Downsizing Fired Up

Author:Howard Stern

“It causes me great pain to sue the company I work for. Nevertheless, I had to do it. Suffice it to say, there's a dispute and I believe I haven't been given what is mine.”

Believe Pain Given I Believe Causes Company Havens Mines Nevertheless Disputes

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm not looking for a paycheck.”

Author:Howard Stern

“I've never come into anything successful before. I've always been hired by horrible radio stations with horrendous reputations and nothing to lose.”

Loses Successful Radio Horrible Reputation Stations Nothing To Lose Radio Stations

Author:Howard Stern

“Most of the things I do are misunderstood. Hey, after all, being misunderstood is the fate of all true geniuses, is it not?”

Fate Genius Hey Misunderstood True Genius Being Misunderstood Private Parts

Author:Howard Stern

“When you hire me, you hire a nut who is going to work 24 hours a day for you and never, ever burn his audience.”

Hours Audience Hard Work Nuts Going To Work

Author:Howard Stern

“I am circumcised, and I tell you something, I despise it. I despise it. I despise it... I am completely pissed off that I'm circumcised.”

Atheist Despise Pissed Off

Author:Howard Stern

“I don't think any religion makes any sense and I think people who are into that are really getting duped, and I don't think Judaism makes any more sense than Christianity, and I don't think Christianity makes any more sense than Scientology. But here's a guy, L. Ron Hubbard, who told all his friends, 'Look, I'm gonna start a religion, 'cause I can't make any money as a science fiction writer.' I mean, he admitted that publicly! At least with Jesus Christ, you can't go talk to the guy.”

People Thinking Looks Mean I Can Guy Religion Jesus Causes Christ Fiction Christianity Atheism Jesus Christ Science Fiction Judaism Fiction Writers Scientology Ron Hubbard L Ron Hubbard

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.”

Ifs I Can Funny Fun Jokes Boring Bored Profanity Being Funny

Author:Howard Stern

“Here's what happens when you die--you sit in a box and get eaten by worms. I guarantee you that when you die, nothing cool happens.”

Happens Dies Boxes Guarantees Worms

Author:Howard Stern

“I believe we will start believing in God as we get closer to death.”

Believe I Believe Believe In God

Author:Howard Stern

“I will never vote Democrat again, they are Communists.”

Vote Democrat Communist

Author:Howard Stern

“Every time I went on the radio, I would take the crummiest radio station, the station that was like a toilet bowl. I would go on there and build up the ratings, so you couldn't do any worse.”

Goes On Radio Stations Bowls Toilets Rating Radio Stations

Author:Howard Stern

“And rather than hide that, I would rather put that out on the radio and let someone see the full range of emotions. If you're going to be strong on the radio, you got to let it all out, even the ugly stuff. And you can't apologize for it.”

Ifs Strong Stuff Emotion Radio Ugly Range Apology Apologizing Range Of Emotions

Author:Howard Stern

“I didn't listen to executives.”

Author:Howard Stern

“I don't like being 50 and I don't like thinking about death.”

Author:Howard Stern

“I don't think there's one thing I've ever said on the radio that would have been found indecent or obscene.”

Thinking Has Beens Said Found One Thing Radio Obscene

Author:Howard Stern

“I think I'm probably a little too desperate to be successful.”

Thinking Littles Successful Desperate Being Successful

Author:Howard Stern

“My mother was very involved with me. And we had a dialogue constantly. And it was like an umbilical cord. As long as the words were flowing back and forth we were connected and feeding each other. And I probably grew up very afraid of losing that connection.”

Long Mother Family Grew Involved Grew Up Losing Connections Connected Dialogue Feeding Back And Forth Cords Umbilical Cord

Author:Howard Stern

“This country (United States) has too many freedoms.”

Country States Freedom United United States

Author:Howard Stern

“I'm not a good listener some times. I'm too much of a control freak. I'm learning to be better. I was so caught up in just getting the job done that I would miss out on the human aspect of this. There was a connection missing.”

Humans Done Jobs Work Too Much Focus Missing Aspect Connections Caught Freak Listeners Caught Up Control Freak Good Listener

Author:Howard Stern

About the Author

Born: January 12, 1954
Known for: Radio personality
Quotes: 75

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