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“But the fantasy kingdom and trappings of success soon lost their luster, as I discovered that the most prestigious and remunerative of my resume's way stations was also the most tedious and unfulfilling I had ever experienced. This paradox only made me more morose about modernity. Why was I going to watch my hairline recede in front of two-thousand-line spreadsheets staring at me from cold, glowing monitors? Why was everyone in my office apparently so happy to be spending so many hours there, when the things they really cared about - people, pets, pastimes - were all relegated to a few photographs on their desks? That seemed to be the formula: spend the best years of your life in an office with photos of what you really care about.”

Life LessonsPurposeFamilyStruggleClarityThought ProvokingNew York CityShort StoryAlexUnfulfilling FeelingChoices Success
Book:The Doorman
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“Summoning my inner Kojak, I tried to convince myself that she would have sat next to me even had there been somewhere else on the bus to sit. Unfortunately, I didn't do a very good job of self-persuasion. Good thing I wasn't in court suing myself, because I would have lost. From: "My Best Valentine's Day.Ever: A Short Story”

New York CityShort StoryFinding LoveValentine S DayFunny HumorLooking For LoveRelationship ProblemsShort Story CollectionZack LoveGeeky LoveGeek Hero
Book:Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
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“So I'm delighted to open up a bit about these particular details, in honor of Valentine's Day (when every balding, chubby, and short actuary wants people - especially the babes out there - to know about his studly past" From: "My Best Valentine's Day.Ever: a Short Story”

New York CityShort StoryFinding LoveValentine S DayFunny HumorRelationships LoveShort Story CollectionZack LoveGeeky LoveGeek Hero
Book:Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
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“At one point, I began to think that I had a divine doorman. Lenny was the most unlikely incarnation of God I could imagine, and yet, I kept drifting irresistibly towards this absurd conclusion. Despite my staunchly atheistic inclinations, I couldn't explain Lenny any other way. But eventually I came to my senses and realized that he was just one of those game show freaks with an encyclopedic memory. That didn't make him God, did it? Would God proclaim so regularly how much he likes Patsy's Pizza?”

GodLife LessonsFaithUnexpectedThought ProvokingShort StoryAlexReligion And PhilosophyNycZack LoveLenny
Book:Stories and Scripts: an Anthology
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“I had always been an atheist until I met Lenny. He was too wonderously complex and good for there to be no benevolent and intelligent force behind our marvelous cosmos. Lenny gave me the actual proof my fiercely skeptical mind had always demanded. Not some logical, 37-step proof of God's existence. It was a personal proof. And it was irrefutable.”

Life LessonsFaithUnexpectedThought ProvokingShort StoryReligion And PhilosophyNycZack LoveLennyTags Alex
Book:The Doorman
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“Speaking of body decorations, I luuhhhvv your belly piercing!” Heeb said, looking at the gold ring in the center of her slim, tan waist. Despite the artic cold, Angelina had opted for a skin tight, black tube top that ended just above her belly, on the assumption that a warm cab, a winter coat, and a short wait to get into the club was an adequate frosty weather strategy. Heeb was still reverently staring at her belly when Angelina finally caught her breath from laughing. “Do you really like it? You’re just saying that so that you can check out my belly!” “And what’s so bad about that? I mean, didn’t you get that belly piercing so that people would check out your belly?” “No. I just thought it would look cool…Do you have any piercings?” “Actually, I do,” Heeb replied. “Where?” “My appendix.” “Huh?” “I wanted to be the first guy with a pierced organ. And the appendix is a totally useless organ anyway, so I figured why the hell not?” “That’s pretty original,” she replied, amused. “Oh yeah. I’ve outdone every piercing fanatic out there. The only problem is when I have to go through metal detectors at the airport.” Angelina burst into laughs again, and then managed to say, “Don’t you have to take it out occasionally for a cleaning?” “Nah. I figure I’ll just get it removed when my appendix bursts. It’ll be a two for one operation, if you know what I mean.”

HumorContemporary RomanceNew York CityFlirtingHilariousRomantic ComedyFunny And RandomRelationship ProblemsChicklitZack LoveGeek HeroMeeting Women
Book:Sex in the Title: A Comedy about Dating, Sex, and Romance in NYC
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“Titus, have you ever had your heart broken?” “Oh, son. How could you ask a man who used to play the blues a question like that?” “How long does it take to go away?” “A broken heart?” “Yeah.” “There’s no precise formula, Sammy.” “Just give me an estimate.” “A good rule of thumb is at least half the time that you were in love. Or twice the time. It all just depends.”

LoveRelationshipsBroken HeartLove HurtsBreakupsAdvice For LifeNycZack LoveTitusHeebSammy Laffowitz
Book:Sex in the Title: A Comedy about Dating, Sex, and Romance in NYC
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