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Quote by Jessica Marie Baumgartner

“I’m doing better than a turkey on Thanksgiving.”

Quote by Jessica Marie Baumgartner

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Jessica Marie Baumgartner

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“English: "Why an agnostic Russell's teapot? All you need is Musk's car in the Sun's orbit." Česky: „Nač agnostická Russellova čajová konvice? Stačí Muskovo auto na oběžné dráze Slunce.”

Philosophy God Humor Metaphor Joke Agnosticism Orbit Elon Musk Philosophical Joke Russell S Teapot

Author:Sebastián Wortys

“English: "To say that a car is not living is similar to saying that an enzyme is not living." Česky: „Říct, že auto není živé, je podobné, jako říct, že enzym není živý.”

Philosophy Metaphor Biology Joke Definition Of Life Organism Superorganism Biology Joke Science Joke Philosophy Joke

Book:Vtiposcifilo-z/s-ofie

Source: Vtiposcifilo-z/s-ofie

“I enjoyed myself as much as I could, trying consciously or unconsciously to fill the void with jokes.”

Family Humour Jokes Teenager Void Joke Diary Entry

Book:The diary of a young girl

Source: The diary of a young girl

“Is there somebody out there? Amy, is that you?” her mother called. “No. Tell me this isn’t happening.” Quinn rested his forehead against hers. “Has she got a wiretap on you or something? I swear, she’s like a walking hard-on detector.” Amy bit her lip, trying not to laugh. Quinn levered himself up on his arms. “Mrs. P., if you value your life, you’ll go back inside and turn off the light right now.”

Funny Romance Humour

Book:Her Best Friend

Source: Her Best Friend

“I bring my lips close to her and murmur, "We're kinda friends now" "I heard that," Garret pipes up, "And there's no 'kinda' about it. We're best friends”

Love Joke Bestfriends

Book:The Deal

Source: The Deal

“Perhaps the only difference between the comedian, the psychologist, and the philosopher is that you can’t pretend to be a comedian.”

Philosophy Humor Psychology Comedy Joke Epigram

Author:Neel Burton

“Some people are cynical, yet they know how to make their intentions sound lyrical, but in the end, they leave you with scares that are unmistakable".”

Cynical Joke Fake People Carelessness Bad Intentions Scares Careless People

Book:Painted Love

Source: Painted Love

“A joke without comedic timing is a statement of pure insanity.”

Book:The New One: Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad

Source: The New One: Painfully True Stories from a Reluctant Dad

“Even among men lacking all distinction he inevitably stood out as a man lacking more distinction than all the rest, and people who met him were always impressed by how unimpressive he was”

Satire Joke Exaggeration

Book:Catch-22

Source: Catch-22

“Well, Metcalf, suppose you try keeping that stupid mouth of yours shut, and maybe that’s the way you’ll learn how. Now, where were we? Read me back the last line.’ “‘Read me back the last line,’” read back the corporal who could take shorthand. “Not my last line, stupid!” the colonel shouted. “Somebody else’s.” “‘Read me back the last line,’” read back the corporal. “That’s my last line again!” shrieked the colonel, turning purple with anger. “Oh, no, sir,” corrected the corporal. “That’s my last line. I read it to you just a moment ago. Don’t you remember, sir? It was only a moment ago.”

Humor Funny Joke Humorous Quotes

Book:Catch-22

Source: Catch-22