“I inherited a painting and a violin which turned out to be a Rembrandt and a Stradivarius. Unfortunately, Rembrandt made lousy violins and Stradivarius was a terrible painter.” MadeHumorFunnyPaintingTerriblePainterViolin Author:Tommy Cooper
“Now, the country is in a terrible state, and you've blamed it on a number of things: Unemployment rate, the value of the pound and all that... wrll, it's because the national anthem is boring.” CountryStatesHumorFunnyValuesNumbersTerribleRateBoringPoundsUnemploymentAnthemNational AnthemUnemployment Rate Author:Billy Connolly
“My mom, for most of her life, was a Holocaust denier. And it was terrible for the entire family to have to deal with until, finally, a couple years ago, we had an intervention. And we had a rabbi come into the home, had him walk her through the history of the Jewish people, and then he made her watch "Schindler's List." And after that, my mom did a complete 180. Now she can't believe it only happened once.” PeopleYearsBelieveMadeHomeHumorFunnyWalksDealsWatchesHappenedMomCoupleTerribleYears AgoMy MomListsHolocaustInterventionRabbiHolocaust DeniersSchindlerSchindler's List Author:Anthony Jeselnik
“This friend of mine had a terrible upbringing. When his mother lifted him up to feed him, his father rented the pram out. Then, when they came into money later, his mother hired a woman to push the pram - and he's been pushed for money ever since.” HumorFunnyMotherFatherMinesTerribleUpbringingPrams Author:Chic Murray