“Really, an historic night last night. You may have heard, Barack Obama will be the first black president of the United States of America. ... Obama is also the first Democrat to receive more than 50 percent of the vote since Jimmy Carter, the first senator to be elected since Jack Kennedy, the first Muslim to be ... I said too much.” FirstsMaySaidStatesLastsAmericaNightBlackPresidentUnitedUnited StatesToo MuchHeardPercentVoteDemocratBarackSenatorsUnited States Of AmericaHistoricLast NightJimmyCarterJack Kennedy Author:Jon Stewart
“Playing President Clinton (in Primary Colors) was risky and challenging. Some people thought Saturday Night Fever was risky, because no one had danced in movies for years.” PeopleYearsNightPresidentChallengesColorClintonPrimariesSaturdayFeverSaturday NightPresident ClintonPrimary ColorsSaturday Night Fever Author:John Travolta
“A president just can't make much showing against congress. They lay awake nights, thinking up things to be against the president on.” ThinkingNightPoliticsPresidentLaysCongressAwakeNight Thinking Author:Will Rogers
“Yesterday in Florida, President Obama kissed a woman on the cheek after she told him he looks good. Which explains why last night, Michelle made him sleep on Air Mattress One.” LooksMadeLastsNightPresidentSleepAirYesterdayPresident ObamaCheeksFloridaLast NightMattresses Author:Jimmy Fallon
“Not a good night for President Obama. He lost elections in Virginia, New Jersey, and he's not doing good in Afghanistan either.” NightLostPresidentElectionAfghanistanPresident ObamaJerseyDoing GoodVirginiaNew JerseyGood Night Author:Jay Leno
“How many watched the President's speech last night? [half-hearted audience applause] How many watched American Idol ? [thundering applause] Okay, there you go! You get the government you deserve.” GovernmentLastsNightPresidentHalfAudienceSpeechDeserveOkayIdolsLast NightHeartedApplauseAmerican IdolHalf Hearted Author:Jay Leno
“Many other cities could go the way that Los Angeles went last night unless the president is willing to step in and take some strong action in terms of letting people know that he cares about this issue.” PeopleKnowsWayCareActionLastsNightStrongPresidentTermCitiesStepsIssuesWillingLos AngelesLast Night Author:Maxine Waters
“I sleep each night a little better, a little more confidently, because Lyndon Johnson is my president. For I know he lives and thinks and works to make sure that for all America and indeed, the growing body of the free world, the morning shall always come.” ThinkingKnowsWorldLittlesBodyAmericaNightPresidentSleepMorningGrowingJohnsonFree World Book:This Time, This Place: My Life in War, the White House, and Hollywood Source: This Time, This Place: My Life in War, the White House, and Hollywood
“At the State of the Union address last night, President Obama made history by using the words transgender, lesbian, and bisexual in that speech. It was the part of the speech where he was just reading Craigslist personals.” MadeStatesLastsNightReadingPresidentSpeechUnionsAddressesPresident ObamaLast NightTransgenderBisexualCraigslist Author:Conan O'Brien
“Tomorrow night President Obama will announce his new immigration plan. Obama's favorite part of his new immigration plan is that he gets to emigrate to another country. He's tired of all this.” CountryNightPresidentPlansTomorrowTiredImmigrationPresident Obama Author:Conan O'Brien
“Last night we had Bill Clinton, the former president. Security was as tight as Governor Christie's yoga pants.” LastsNightPresidentSecurityYogaBillsClintonFormerPantsGovernorsLast NightChristieYoga Pants Author:David Letterman
“Today is the anniversary of the Gettysburg Address. President Lincoln wrote it on his way to the site of the speech on the back of an envelope. One guy on the back of an envelope wrote the great Gettysburg Address - while every night it takes six guys to write this crap!” WayWritingTodayNightGuyPresidentSpeechSixAddressesEvery NightSiteCrapEnvelopesGettysburgGettysburg AddressPresident Lincoln Author:David Letterman
“We had President Obama on the show last night. I think the president enjoys visiting NBC because we're the only place that has lower numbers than he does.” ThinkingDoeShowsLastsNightEnjoyPresidentNumbersPresident ObamaLast NightVisitingNbc Author:Jay Leno
“On the August night in 1933 when General Gerardo Machado, then president of Cuba, flew out of Havana into exile, he took with him five revolvers, seven bags of gold, and five friends, still in their pajamas.” StillsNightPresidentFiveGoldSevenBagsExileCubaFlewAugustPajamasRevolverHavanaFive Friends Author:Joan Didion
“Sometimes, people mistake fire in the belly for too much pepperoni pizza the night before. They make a great speech and people come up to them and tell them, "You could be president." And the next thing you know, they're running, not because they really ought to or have any shot at doing it, but because they have, you know, a handful of people that tell them they are looking at the next president.” PeopleKnowsSometimesRunningNightNextPresidentMistakeFireToo MuchOughtSpeechShotsCome UpBellyHandfulPizzaGreat Speech Author:Mike Huckabee
“The choreographed standing and clapping of one side of the room - while the other side sits - is unbecoming of a serious institution and the message that it sends is that even on a night when the president is addressing the entire nation, we in Congress cannot sit as one, but must be divided as two.” TwoNightNationsSidesPresidentRoomsSeriousMessagesStandingInstitutionsCongressDividedLaw EnforcementClappingUnbecoming Author:Mark Udall
“During last night's Republican debate, Mike Huckabee got a big laugh when he said that Congress has been spending money like John Edwards at a beauty salon. Then Huckabee got an even bigger laugh when he said he's running for president” Has BeensSaidBigsRunningLastsNightPresidentLaughingRepublicanBiggerCongressSpendingDebateLast NightMikeSpending MoneySalonsBeauty Salon Author:Conan O'Brien
“People made a big deal out of the fact this is the first time a sitting president has done a late-night show. We tried to have other presidents on, but President Bush went to bed every night at 9:00. And President Clinton always seemed to have other late-night plans.” PeopleFirstsMadeDoneFactsShowsBigsNightPresidentDealsPlansBedLateSittingFirst TimeClintonEvery NightBig DealPresident BushLate NightPresident Clinton Author:Jay Leno
“In his press conference last night, President Bush said he could not remember a single mistake he had made in the last two years. The president's exact quote was: 'I ain't make none mistakes ever.'” YearsMadeSaidTwoLastsRememberNightPresidentMistakePressesTwo YearsConferencesLast NightPresident BushPress ConferencesOne Mistake Author:Conan O'Brien
“The other night, President Bush's press conference was pre-empted by 'American Idol.' You know the difference between President Bush and 'American Idol?' See, on 'American Idol,' the one with the most votes wins.” KnowsNightWinningPresidentDifferencesVotePressesIdolsConferencesPresident BushAmerican IdolPress Conferences Author:Jay Leno
“Last night, President Bush gave a prime-time press conference. It was such a big deal that Fox decided to preempt American Idol. Which made sense to me, you don't want too many amateurs on in one night.” WantMadeBigsLastsNightPresidentDealsDecidedPressesPrimeIdolsFoxesConferencesLast NightBig DealPresident BushOne NightAmerican IdolPress ConferencesPrime Time Author:David Letterman
“The truth of the matter is one knows what it's like being the president. Not I, nor any president to come hence. This is because life, thankfully, offers deeper quandaries. While in office, I would often wake up in a daze, wondering how I could wiggle my toes without even thinking it so, or why hair grows only on certain places and not our entire bodies, or why we aren't completely bald, or why we must close our eyes and sleep every night, or any of the millions of particulars of daily existence, let alone that I was elected the leader of an entire nation.” ThinkingKnowsMatterBodyEyeNightCertainNationsGrowsPresidentSleepExistenceLeaderWonderMillionsHairOffersOfficeWake UpDeeperEvery NightToesDaze Author:George Washington
“Nixon's the kind of guy that if you were drowning fifty feet off shore, he'd throw you a thirty foot rope. Then Kissinger would go on TV the next night and say that the President had met you more than half-way.” IfsWayKindNightGuyNextPresidentHalfFeetTvsGoes OnMetsThirtyFiftyShoreRopeDrowningHalf WayKissinger Author:Mort Sahl
“I work with the president almost on a daily basis. I was with him until 6:30 last night. I'll be with him Thursday morning. We talk every day.” LastsNightPresidentMorningBasesLast NightThursday Author:Dan Quayle
“Donald Trump is not running for president. This is devastating news for Trump's supporters - all of whom are late night comedians.” RunningNightPresidentTrumpLateNewsComedianSupporterLate Night Author:Conan O'Brien
“Donald Trump is going to make an announcement about running for President on the season finale of Celebrity Apprentice. Not to be outdone, the same night the Cake Boss will reveal his plan for overhauling Medicare.” RunningNightPresidentPlansTrumpSeasonsBossCakeMedicareApprenticeAnnouncementsFinale Author:Conan O'Brien