“I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.” HumorChristianFunnyBeliefReligiousFourWonderfulCalmAdmireSuperstitionsAssuranceReligious FaithSereneAces Author:Mark Twain
“Well, it's an unimaginable honor to be the president during the Fourth of July of this country. It means what these words say, for starters. The great inalienable rights of our country. We're blessed with such values in America. And I - it's - I'm a proud man to be the nation based upon such wonderful values.” MenWellsMeanCountryHumorAmericaPoliticalValuesNationsPresidentRightsWonderfulProudHonorBlessedOur CountryFourthJulyPolitical HumorUnimaginableStartersInalienable RightsProud Man Author:George W. Bush
“I am against the war, but I do support our white troops. No, I'm kidding, I'm kidding. I'm not a Republican. I'm not a member of the party of inclusion. Wonderful, tolerant, rational human beings they are.” HumansWarHumorFunnyHuman BeingsWhitePartySupportWonderfulRepublicanMembersRationalInclusionTroops Author:David Cross
“I was in a panto last year, Aladdin and The Wonderful Lamp. I played the wick. I got the sack because I was too well-oiled every night.” YearsWellsHumorFunnyLastsNightWonderfulEvery NightLast YearLamps Author:Frank Carson
“When I was a kid my parents used to tell me, "Emo, don't go near the cellar door!" One day when they were away, I went up to the cellar door. And I pushed it and walked through and saw strange, wonderful things, things I had never seen before, like... trees. Grass. Flowers. The sun... that was nice... the sun.” HumorKidsFunnyUsedParentSunSawsNiceWonderfulDoorsTreeStrangeFlowerOne DayGrassWonderful ThingsCellarsEmo Author:Emo Philips
“A Mormon told me that they don't drink coffee. I said, "A cup of coffee every day gives you wonderful benefits." He said, "Like what?" I said, "Well, it keeps you from being Mormon ..."” GivingWellsSaidHumorFunnyWonderfulDrinkBenefitsCoffeeCupsCoffee Cup Author:Emo Philips
“There is, in fact, no law or government at all; and it is wonderful how well things go on without them.” WellsFactsHumorGovernmentFunnyLawWonderfulGoes OnHumorousItalian Author:Lord Byron