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Chris Rock

Chris Rock Quotes

Comedian

Chris Rock is an American comedian, actor, screenwriter, and producer. He rose to fame in the 1990s with his stand-up comedy and has since starred in several successful films. Rock has been recognized with numerous awards for his work, including an Academy Award for Best Original Screenplay for his film 'The Longest Night'.

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Famous Chris Rock Quotes

“Does having a wife and kids change your act? Yes, but only in the best way. It gives you weight and authority. It also makes you closer to the audience because the audience is married and has kids.”

Way Giving Doe Kids Audience Wife Authority Married Weight Best Way

Author:Chris Rock

“Success is just hanging out with my kids. I mean, I always say if you have options, you're rich. To me, success is the fact that hey, I just did a movie and maybe I'll do some stand up, maybe I'll will write a book or maybe I will do a play.”

Ifs Writing Mean Book Play Facts Kids Rich Hey Hanging Out

Author:Chris Rock

“My dad worked every day. I didn't get into show business to work every day. So the fact that most days I get to like, spend really good time with my kids - that's what success is to me.”

Facts Shows Kids Dad My Dad Good Times Show Business

Author:Chris Rock

“I was at Michael Jackson's house, and this kid runs out, 'Wait, save me!'”

Humor Running Kids Funny House Waiting Save Me

Author:Chris Rock

“If a kid calls his grandma "Mommy" and his mama "Pam", he's going to jail!”

Ifs Humor Kids Funny Jail Mama Grandma

Author:Chris Rock

“They're working their way down. Next year, Todd Bridges gets the award. When I was a kid I wanted to be Eddie Murphy and now I'm a rip-off of Eddie Murphy.”

Way Years Humor Kids Wanted Funny Next Bridges Awards Rip Next Year Murphy

Author:Chris Rock

“That's all we had when I was a kid: Robitussin. No matter what you got, Robitussin better handle it. "Daddy, I got asthma." "Robitussin." "I got cancer." "Robitussin." "I broke my leg." Daddy poured Robitussin on it. "Yeah, boy, let that 'tussin get in there. Yeah, boy, let that 'tussin get on down to the bone. The 'tussin ought to straighten out the bone."”

Matter Kids Funny Boys Comedy Ought No Matter What Yeah Cancer Legs Bones Handle Broke Daddy Asthma

Author:Chris Rock

“It's my real name. My mother's name is Rose Rock. It was the worst name as a kid to have. They called me Piece of the Rock, Plymouth Rock, Joe Rockid, and Flintstones. Now they call me Mister Rock.”

Real Kids Mother Names Pieces Worst Rocks Rose Call Me Plymouth Flintstones Plymouth Rock

Author:Chris Rock

“There's no interference in stand-up. It's all the things it's hard to get in film: I get to have a wife, I get to have kids. I get to be sexual. I get to grow. I get to be a man.”

Men Hard Kids Film Grows Wife Be A Man Interference

Author:Chris Rock

“All people naturally hate. My kid bites people now. I didn't teach my kid to bite anybody. Kids say mean stuff. Only through love do we get this evil out of them. Only through love and structure and discipline do they not hate. The kids that hate didn't learn anything, that's the problem.”

People Mean Problem Kids Hate Evil Stuff Teach Discipline Structure Bites

Author:Chris Rock

“You know, you get famous and you work in these weird jobs and you don't have a lot in common with people. But once you have kids, you have everything in common with everybody.”

People Knows Kids Jobs Common

Author:Chris Rock

“My kids don't have a trust fund, they have a debt fund. Oh my God, they're $4 million in the hole.”

Kids Millions Debt Holes Fund Trust Funds

Author:Chris Rock

“I was bused to a school in Gerritsen Beach in Brooklyn in 1972. I was one of the first black kids in the history of the school.”

Firsts Kids School Black Beach Brooklyn

Author:Chris Rock

“When you have kids, there's no such thing as quality time. There's just time. There's no, 'Ooh, his graduation's better than going to the mall.' It's all kind of equal. Changing her diaper and her winning a contest - it's all good.”

Kind Kids Father Winning Quality Dad Equal All Kinds Contests Malls Fathers Day Diapers Good Father Quality Time

Author:Chris Rock

“I always say about my daughters, they save me from my miserable self. They take me out, you know, a comedian, you could live in your head a lot. And you're writing and you're doubting. But when I'm with my kids and my family, it's all about them.”

Knows Writing Self Kids Mother Doubt Daughter My Family Miserable Comedian My Daughter Take Me Save Me

Author:Chris Rock

“Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep. And when I see the Tea Party and all this stuff, it actually feels like racism’s almost over. Because this is the last - this is the act up before the sleep. They’re going crazy. They’re insane. You want to get rid of them - and the next thing you know, they’re fucking knocked out. And that’s what’s going on in the country right now.”

Knows Want Feels Country Kids Lasts Next Stuff Sleep Party Crazy Right Now Racism Insane Tea Going To Sleep Tea Party Going Crazy Almost Over

Author:Chris Rock

“Kids raised on a culture of “We’re not going to keep score in the game because we don’t want anybody to lose.” Or just ignoring race to a fault. You can’t say “the black kid over there.” No, it’s “the guy with the red shoes.” You can’t even be offensive on your way to being inoffensive.”

Way Want Kids Guy Culture Games Black Loses Race Red Faults Raised Shoes Score Offensive Red Shoes

Author:Chris Rock

“So, to say Obama is progress is saying that he’s the first black person that is qualified to be president. That’s not black progress. That’s white progress. There’s been black people qualified to be president for hundreds of years. The question is, you know, my kids are smart, educated, beautiful, polite children. There have been smart, educated, beautiful, polite black children for hundreds of years. The advantage that my children have is that my children are encountering the nicest white people that America has ever produced. Let’s hope America keeps producing nicer white people.”

“Kids always act up the most before they go to sleep.”

Kids Sleep Going To Sleep

Author:Chris Rock

About the Author

Born: February 7, 1965
Known for: Comedian
Quotes: 342

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