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Eoin Colfer

Eoin Colfer Biography

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“How do I love thee? wondered Orion. "Let me see. I love thee passionately and eternally...obviously eternally-that goes without saying." Holly blinked sweat from her eyes. "Is he serious?" she called over her shoulder to Foaly. "Oh, absolutely," said the centaur "If he asks you to look for birthmarks, say no immediately." "Oh, I would never." Orion assured her. "Ladies don't look for birthmarks; that is work for jolly fellows like the Goodly Beast and myself. Ladies, like Miss Short, do enough by simply existing. They exude beauty, and that is enough." "I am not exuding anything." said Holly, through gritted teeth. Orion tapped her shoulder. "I beg to differ. You're exuding right now, a wonderful aura. It's pastel blue with little dolphins." Holly gripped the wheel tightly. "I'm going to be sick. Did he just say pastel blue?" "And dolphins, little ones," said Foaly.”

RomanceOrionHollyAtlantis ComplexFoaly
Book:The Atlantis Complex
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“The Jeep inched forward at a painfully slow rate, made all the more excruciating by the anticipation building in Artemis's chest. He could suppress it no longer. Could they at last be at the end of their quest? After six false alarms across three continents, could this wine-sodden healer be the gold at the end of the rainbow? Artemis almost chuckled. Gold at the end of the rainbow. He'd made a joke. Now there's something that didn't happen everyday.”

AnticipationContinentsJokeQuestArtemisJeepFalse AlarmsGold At The End Of The RainbowUnusualness
Book:Artemis Fowl
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“Butler snapped his fingers. "Focus, Artemis! Time enough for your Atlantis Complex later. We have the Atlantis Trench outside that door and six miles of water above it. If you want to stay alive, you need to stay alert." He turned to Holly. "This is ridiculous. I'm pulling the plug." Holly's mouth was a tight line as she shook her head. "Navy rules, Butler. You're on my boat, you follow my orders." "As I remember, I brought the boat." "Yes, thanks for bringing my boat.”

BoatArtemisButlerOrdersHolly
Book:The Atlantis Complex
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“Hey, bodyguard. You better get down to the gymnasium. This jumbo pixie guy is killing your sister." "Really?" said Butler, unconvinced. "Really. Juliet just does not seem to be herself. She can't put two moves together. It's pathetic, really. Everybody is betting against her." "I see," said Butler, straightening. Mulch held the door. "It's going to make things really interesting when you show up to help." Butler grinned. "I'm not coming to help. I just want to be there when she stops faking." "Ah," said Mulch, comprehension dawning on his face. "So I should switch my bet to Juliet?" "You certainly should" said Butler.”

FightingJulietBettingButlerFakingAtlantis ComplexMulch
Author:Eoin Colfer
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“..Just two short guys home for the holidays.' Loafers bristled. 'What do you mean two short guys?' Carla snapped the compact shut. 'Who are you talking to, McGuire? Because you couldn't be talking to me. Not in that tone.' Loafers paled, his life flashing before him. 'I'm sorry, Miss Frazetti. It's just the short thing. I've been listening to it my whole life.' 'What do you want people to call you? Lofty? You're short, Loafers. Get over it. That's what gives you your edge. My godfather always says there's nothing more dangerous than a short guy with something to prove. That's why you've got a job.”

Strengths And WeaknessesSuck It Up
Book:The Eternity Code
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“And I don't have a present for you.' 'A present?' said Artemis. 'Of course,' sang his mother, spinning him around. 'Don't you know what day it is?' 'Day?' 'It's Christmas Day, you silly boy. Christmas Day! Presents are traditional, are they not?' Yes, thought Artemis. Traditional. San D'Klass. […] 'Now Arty, I want to know everything. First of all, what happened here?' 'Remodeling,' said Artemis. 'The old doorway was riddled with damp.' Angeline frowned, completely unconvinced. 'I see. And how about school? Have you decided on a career?' While his mouth answered these everyday questions, Artemis's mind was in turmoil. He was a boy again. His life was going to change utterly. His plans would have to be much more devious than usual if they were to escape his mother's attention. But it would be worth it. Angeline Fowl was wrong. She had brought him a Christmas present.”

LyingMotherTraditionChristmasPresentArtemisChristmas DayChristmas PresentAngelineSan D Klass
Book:Artemis Fowl
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“Orion sniffed. "Good. Then, Worthy Centaur, perhaps you could give me a ride to the village on your back. Then I can make a few pennies with my verses while you build us a shack and perform circus tricks for passersby." This was such a surprising statement that Foaly briefly considered jumping into the hole to get away. "This isn't Middle Earth, you know. We're not in a novel. I am not noble, neither do I have a repertoire of circus tricks." Orion seemed disappointed. "Can you juggle at least?”

Middle EarthOrionCentaurAtlantis ComplexFoaly
Author:Eoin Colfer
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