There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

“I just invented a way to put the smooth sounds of a saxophone directly into a trumpet—with little or minimal rusting. When you listen to my music, just close your eyes, because your mind is about to take a romantic trip—inside of a mental elevator.”

HumorRomanceMusicRomanticAbsurdSaxophoneElevatorTrumpet

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“The harmonica has musical wind, and is the breath of soul. It’s like a sad, lonely I love you lost in the breeze.”

SoulPoetryMusicWindSadLonelyPoeticBreezeBreathHarmonica

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“Eddie Money and Johnny Cash should have collaborated. I’d have paid good last name to see them in concert.”

HumorMoneyMusicConcertFiat CurrencyEddie MoneyJounny Cash

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“They don't play the trombone like the tuba anymore. I blame it on canned tunafish.”

HumorMusicAbsurdTunaTromboneTuba

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“I'm so good at math that you can ask me any question, any equation, and I'll convert it into trumpet sounds with my mouth. If it's tough enough, I may answer with Dizzy Gillespie noises.”

HumorMusicMathAbsurdSurrealEquationTrumpet

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“The strings on a guitar are like fishing lines, and I strum them out at sea. Each string has a distinct sound and flavor, but the most popular with the sharks is Leftover Meatloaf, which sounds like Color Me Badd’s 1991 song “I Wanna Sex You Up.”

HumorSexSoundMusicGuitarFishingSurrealFishShark

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“Self-driving cars are so lonely. Are you really going to use all that extra commute time to binge-watch Netflix? Why not hire me to sit next to you and whistle all your favorite tunes?”

HumorMusicCarAbsurdTransportationCarsNetflixWhistlingWhistleSelf Driving

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“I dance like both my shoes are nailed to the wall. It goes way beyond mere performance and into the realm of art. I am the Rodin of the music world.”

ArtHumorMusicDancingDanceShoesSculptureSurrealPerformanceRodin

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“The key to dancing is to do it without music. Whoever first paired dancing and music together was an absolute lunatic, and would have been more useful to society if squeezed out of a tube of toothpaste. Nine out of ten dentists agree with me.”

HumorMusicSocietyDancingDanceLunaticDentistToothpaste

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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“What's the difference between running shoes and dancing shoes? Nothing, if you find a song that's 26.2 miles long.”

HumorRunningSongMusicDancingDanceAbsurdMarathonRun

Book:There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

Source: There are Two Typos of People in This World: Those Who Can Edit and Those Who Can't

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