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Molly Ivins Quotes

Columnist

Molly Ivins was a prominent American columnist, born on August 30, 1944, and passed away on January 31, 2007. Known for her sharp wit and humorous style, she wrote columns for publications such as The Houston Chronicle and The New Yorker.

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All Texas People Thinking Government Ifs Political Needs Country Has Beens Hell Libertarian Men Firsts America Believe Doe Knows Nations Politics Should

Famous Molly Ivins Quotes

“Sometimes I think Texas exists as a reality check for those who might wander too far toward the precious.”

Thinking Sometimes Reality Might Checks Wander Texas

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“the more a body tries to explode all the foolish myths that have grown up about Texas by telling the truth, the more a body will wind up adding to the mythology.”

Trying Body Wind Myth Foolish Mythology Telling The Truth Texas

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“no one has ever accused Texas of being in the vanguard of social progress. This is the most macho state in the U.S. of A. By lore, legend, and fact, Texas is 'hell' on women and horses.”

States Facts Social Hell Progress Horse Texas Legends Accused Macho Social Progress Vanguard

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“Texas liberals are the camels of good news. We can cross entire deserts between oases.”

News Crosses Desert Texas Good News Camels Oasis

Author:Molly Ivins

“I learned two things growing up in Texas. 1: God loves you, and you're going to burn in hell forever. 2: Sex is the dirtiest and most dangerous thing you can possibly do, so save it for someone you love.”

Two Sex Hell Forever Growing Up Growing Love You Dangerous God Love Two Things Texas Dangerous Things One You Love Someone You Love God Loves You

Author:Molly Ivins

“I think of Texas as the laboratory for bad government.”

Thinking Government Texas Laboratory Bad Government

Author:Molly Ivins

“I dearly love the state of Texas, but I consider that a harmless perversion on my part, and discuss it only with consenting adults.”

States Adults Texas Perversion

Author:Molly Ivins

“Next time I tell you someone from Texas should not be president of the United States, please pay attention.”

Should States Next President United Pay Attention United States Please Pay Attention Texas Next Time

Author:Molly Ivins

“As they say around the Texas Legislature, if you can't drink their whiskey, screw their women, take their money, and vote against 'em anyway, you don't belong in office.”

Ifs Political Politics Drink Office Vote Ems Texas Screws Whiskey Legislature

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“Good thing we've still got politics in Texas - finest form of free entertainment ever invented.”

Stills Form Political Politics Good Things Entertainment Texas Finest

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“I never saw anything funnier than Texas politics.”

Saws Texas

Author:Molly Ivins

“Havin' fun while freedom fightin' must be one of those lunatic Texas traits we get from the water - which is known to have lithium in it - because it goes all the way back to Sam Houston, surely the most lovable, the most human, and the funniest of all the great men this country has ever produced.”

Men Way Humans Country Fun Water Known Great Men Texas Traits Lunatic Lovable Houston Lithium Most Lovable

Author:Molly Ivins

“In Texas, we do not hold high expectations for the [governor's] office; it's mostly been occupied by crooks, dorks and the comatose.”

Political Politics Office Expectations Texas Governors Crooks High Expectations Dork Comatose

Author:Molly Ivins

“Naturally, when it comes to voting, we in Texas are accustomed to discerning that fine hair’s-breadth worth of difference that makes one hopeless dipstick slightly less awful than the other. But it does raise the question: Why bother?”

Doe Differences Hair Fine Raises Awful Bother Voting Hopeless Texas Accustomed Breadth Discerning Texan Why Bother

Author:Molly Ivins

“Texas is a fine place for men and dogs, but hell on women and horses.”

Men Hell Dog Fine Horse Texas Man And Dog

Author:Molly Ivins

“Mostly, Texas women are tough in some very fundamental ways. Not unfeminine, nor necessarily unladylike, just tough!”

Way Tough Fundamentals Texas

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“Humanism is not alive and well in Texas. Different colors and types of Texans do not like one another, nor do they pretend to.”

Wells Different Alive Color Type Humanism Texas Texan Different Colors

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“Texas is not a civilized place. Texans shoot one another a lot. They also knife, razor, and stomp one another to death with some frequency. And they fight in bars all the time.”

Fighting Punishment Bars Civilized Texas Knives Frequency Razors Texan

Book:Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

“Every two years, one of the most hotly contested elections in Texas is the poll taken among members of the capitol press corps to determine who are actually the ten stupidest members of the Legislature. Two years ago, there were thirty-seven official nominees and several write-ins.”

Source: Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?

About the Author

Born: August 30, 1944
Died: January 31, 2007
Known for: Columnist
Quotes: 137

Books & Sources

Molly Ivins Can't Say That, Can She?Related source material

You Got to Dance with Them What Brung YouRelated source material

Who Let the Dogs In?: Incredible Political Animals I Have KnownRelated source material

Shrub: The Short But Happy Political Life of George W. BushRelated source material

Nothin' But Good Times AheadRelated source material

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