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Quote by Andy Borowitz

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Andy Borowitz
Andy Borowitz

Andy Borowitz, born on January 4, 1958, is an American writer known for his satirical and humorous style. He is the creator of The Borowitz Report, a satirical news website that has gained widespread attention for its humorous take on political, cultural, and social issues. His work has had a significant impact on contemporary humor literature. more

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“We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.”

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Author:Winston Churchill
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“I've had this look for about a year. I usually grow this beard out around Christmas. I like to go to malls dressed as Jesus, and I like to then walk around the mall and go, 'No! No! This wasn't what it was supposed to be about, people!' Then if there's a Santa at the mall, I walk up to him and say, 'Listen, fat man, you're just a clown at my birthday party.'”

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Author:Marc Maron
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“I set a personal record on Christmas. I got my shopping done three weeks ahead of time. I had all the presents back at my apartment, I was halfway through wrapping them, and I realized, 'Damn, I used the wrong wrapping paper.' The paper I used said, 'Happy Birthday.' I didn't want to waste it, so I just wrote 'Jesus' on it.”

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Author:Demetri Martin
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