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Quote by Dave Barry

“Miami drivers will attempt to pass you inside a car wash.”

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Dave Barry is a renowned American humorist, born on July 3, 1947. His works are known for their unique humor style and satirical observations of everyday life. more

“To defend Western Europe we have to let the Pentagon buy all these tanks and guns and things, and the Pentagon is unable to buy any object that that costs less than a condominium in Vail. If the Pentagon needs, say, fruit, it will argue that it must have fruit that can withstand the rigors of combat conditions, and it will wind up purchasing the FX-700 Seedless Tactical Grape, which will cost $160,000 per bunch, and will have an 83 percent failure rate.”

Ifs Needs Conditions Objects Wind Cost Percent Gun Europe Fruit Western Rate Arguing Bunch Combat Tanks Grapes Pentagon Rigor Purchasing Tactical Western Europe

Author:Dave Barry

“To enter Europe, you must have a valid passport with a photograph of yourself in which you look like you are being booked on charges of soliciting sheep.”

Looks Like You Europe Photograph Sheep Passports

Book:Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need

Source: Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need

“I read one psychologist's theory that said, "Never strike a child in your anger." When could I strike him? When he is kissing me on my birthday? When he's recuperating from measles? Do I slap the Bible out of his hand on Sunday?”

Children Said Hands Family Theory Kissing Strikes Sunday Psychologist Slap My Birthday Measles

Author:Erma Bombeck

Quote by Dave Barry

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