“When they were naming the animals, somebody got lazy: anteater? What's it doing? It's eating ants. DONE!” DoneHumorFunnyAnimalEatingLazyAnts Author:Demetri Martin
“You ever find yourself being lazy for no reason at all? Like, you pick up your mail, you go in your house, you realize you have a letter for a neighbor. You ever just look at the letter and go "Hm. Looks like they're never getting this. It'll take too much energy to go back outside. I'm gonna get that to them later on. Right now I gotta watch some 'Love Connection.' They got some new host on there."” LooksReasonHumorFunnyHouseEnergyRealizingWatchesToo MuchLike YouRight NowPicksLettersConnectionsNeighborLazyNo ReasonFinding YourselfHostMailBeing LazyLove Connection Author:Jim Gaffigan
“Sometimes being lazy can get you in trouble. You ever not take a shower all weekend, just lounge around, then you're running late for work on Monday? There's always one person at work: "Something smells like smoke in here!" "Uh, I went to a barbeque on Friday night. Only had 48 hours to take a shower. Busy."” PersonsSometimesHumorRunningFunnyNightHoursTroubleLateBusySmellSmokeLazyWeekendShowersMondayFridayFriday NightBeing Lazy48 HoursRunning Late Author:Jim Gaffigan
“I'm so lazy I've got a smoke alarm with a snooze button.” HumorFunnySmokeLazyButtonsAlarmsVinesSnooze Button Author:Tim Vine
“I'm the munter of my friends. I've got wonky teeth and a lazy eye. My friend Rob is disgusted I'm a heart-throb.” HeartHumorEyeFunnyMy FriendsTeethLazyDisgustedLazy Eyes Author:Russell Howard