“I'm trying to feel terrified and alone. And regret every decision I've ever made, drenched in a cold sweat. It's called going to sleep. Maybe you've heard of it.” FeelsTryingMadeSleepDecisionHeardRegretColdSweatTerrifiedGoing To Sleep Author:Arj Barker
“You can get tested now for early onset Alzheimer's. Hold on a second, could someone hire a marching band, cause I'm so happy I feel like having a parade. You mean I can find out early if I'm going to die of a super horrible disease that there's no cure for? Well, whoopee!” IfsFeelsWellsMeanI CanDiesCausesBandDiseaseHorribleCuresTestedParadesAlzheimerAlzheimer'sMarching Band Author:Arj Barker
“There's no razor in candy. If for no other reason, it doesn't make financial sense. It's not fiscally prudent. How much does a piece of candy cost - like, a penny and a half? An apple's like 15 cents? Anybody here bought a Mach 3 replacement cartridge recently? They're so expensive, they don't even keep them on the shelf. You know, you have to ask the people behind the counter. I feel like I'm trying to buy enriched plutonium or something.” PeopleIfsKnowsFeelsTryingDoeReasonAsksBehindsHalfPiecesCostFinancialApplesExpensiveCentsShelvesCandyPenniesPrudentRazorsReplacementsPlutonium Author:Arj Barker
