The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

“After all, what was school for, but to strain your eyes in order to decipher what a doctor had said, which was a question you should especially ask if the prescriptions were from an optometrist that questioned the legitimacy of his teachings.”

SchoolFunnyTeachingHumorousWittyCleverSarcasmPrescriptionsOptometristOptometry

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“The mule took out two small jars, one of a white gooey texture and another of a blueish red liquid that wasn’t purple because the mule had skipped art class when he was younger”

ArtSchoolFunnyColorHumorousWittyCleverSarcasmColorsArt School

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“The groomer wasn’t provided any dental care or skin care and that’s the truth. Just ask his dentdermatautologist, he’ll tell you.”

FunnyHumorousLogicWittyCleverAbsurdSatireDentistQuirkyDermatology

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“But before the man could reach the door, there was a knock, like one that happens to precipitate a courtship meeting for two punctuation marks that are going out to dinner and one really doesn’t like the restaurant, but goes anyway because they’re a comma dating.”

FunnyHumorousDatingWittyDinnerCleverAbsurdCourtshipPunctuationWordplay

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“like someone who obsessively collects paintings of hoarders”

HumorFunnyHumorousWittyCleverObsessionHilariousCollectingHoardingPaintings

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“the designer music shop that sold status cymbals.”

HumorFunnyMusicHumorousWittyAbsurdSarcasmStatusWordplay

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“as they marched out on their way to band practice to get fitted for new hats to hide foam rollers in, as the athletic director was very against the band members having smooth fascia and demanded they have sore muscles while the football team played.”

FunnyFootballHumorousWittyCleverAbsurdMusclesSarcasmAthleticsMarching Band

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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“The hummingbird realized that this was a psychological tightrope that he had to navigate carefully, so he did it sideways because this was the only way he could move when perched”

HumorFunnyPsychologyHumorousWittyCleverAbsurdSarcasmBirdsHummingbird

Book:The Satyrist...And Other Scintillating Treats

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