“What a dog I got, he found out we look alike, so he killed himself.”
Quote by Rodney Dangerfield
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“Suicide is cheating the doctor out of job.”
Source: Uncle Sam's Uncle Josh: Or, Josh Billings on Practically Everything, Distilled from Josh's Rum and Tansy New England Wit by Donald Day
“How many of you have ever started dating because you were too lazy to commit a suicide?”
“My wife made me join a bridge club... I jump off next Tuesday.”
“I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.”
“If I ever mary, it will be on a suddn impulse - as aman shoots himself”
