“I hate sandwiches at New York delis. Too much meat on the sandwich. It's like a cow with a cracker on either side. "Would you like anything else with the pastrami sandwich?" "Yeah, a loaf of bread and some other people!"” PeopleHumorFunnyPastHateSidesToo MuchNew YorkI HateYeahBreadMeatCowsSandwichesCrackersPastrami Author:Mitch Hedberg
“A new cologne is coming out. It's for cowboys, and it's made from cow's manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!” WayMadeHumorFunnyComing OutCowsCowboyManureCologne Author:Bill Maher
“Why do people want to swim with dolphins? The equivalent would be an Indonesian fellow coming over here, going up to a farmer and saying 'Can I get in with the cows? I just fancy scuffling about with them.'” PeopleWantHumorWould BeFunnyFellowsFancySwimFarmersCowsDolphins Author:Bill Bailey
“You're never going to go. Why would you go? It's a disgusting place. It's always wet even when it's dry. There's nothing there. Farmers aren't really people, you know this. They're just necessary, we need somebody to kill cows.” PeopleKnowsNeedsHumorFunnyDryFarmersCowsWetDisgusting Author:Dylan Moran
“You're supposed to eat the cows. They're great big lumbering stupid things - they'd be everywhere if we didn't eat them.” IfsHumorBigsFunnyStupidCowsStupid Things Author:Dylan Moran