Best Late Night Quotes | Short & Famous Sayings Page 2

“The way I approach stardom and the show, I'm like a politician. I'm an elected late-night official to do your work.”

Way Shows Night Politician Late Approach Officials Stardom Late Night

“When you're doing late night you're on the grind every night; you send someone to check on your mom.”

Night Mom Late Checks Every Night Grind Your Mom Late Night

“Once when I was cooking I burned my arm with scalding water. I went to the Emergency Room of the Hospital. When the doctor came in he looked at me and looked at my chart, and looked at me and looked at my chart, then looked at me again and said, "I loved your show!" He told me that when he was doing his internship he would come home every night stressed out, but he would watch a late night rerun of the Andy Griffith Show and relax and fall asleep. He said, "I wouldn't be a doctor, if it wasn't for the Andy Griffith Show".”

“To all the secret writers, late-night painters, would-be singers, lapsed and scared artists of every stripe, dig out your paintbrush, or your flute, or your dancing shoes. Pull out your camera or your computer or your pottery wheel. Today, tonight, after the kids are in bed or when your homework is done, or instead of one more video game or magazine, create something, anything. Pick up a needle and thread, and stitch together something particular and honest and beautiful, because we need it. I need it. Thank you, and keep going.”

“I do the meatball recipe a lot. I think the army stew probably too. It's the most useful dish because it was born out of necessity and poverty and any idiot can make it in 20 minutes on a hot plate. It's cheap and uses readily available commercial ingredients. And it's delicious. It should be the great American dish - perfect late-night stoner dorm food for college kids on a budget.”

“About a year after I moved to Los Angeles, I decided I wanted to be a joke writer for a late night talk show. So I met with a late night joke writer and he told me that I should start by doing stand-up comedy, because that would really hone my sense of humor and joke writing ability. Eventually I took a stand-up class and a few months later I had a seven-minute act.”

Should Writing Years Shows Wanted Night Ability Class Comedy Minutes Months Mets Late Jokes Decided Moved Seven Los Angeles Sense Of Humor Talk Shows Late Night Stand Up Comedy

Author:Anthony Jeselnik

“[Late-night host] is not really a job for a woman. You can't have kids and be a late-night host.I mean Samantha Bee has children, but you're there all day and all night. No one has a life outside of it. I would never try to have a family. I care much more about a career anyway, than having a family, so that's my own prerogative. It's just not something that a woman.”

Trying Mean Children Care Kids Jobs Night My Own Careers Late Host Bees I Care All Night Prerogative Late Night Samantha

Author:Chelsea Handler

“That was an interesting thing I learned I think the first time I did a late night show or something. It was like, "Oh, this is for the camera and a performance that you're giving to the people at home."”

People Thinking Giving Firsts Shows Home Night Interesting Late First Time Performances Cameras Interesting Things Late Night

Author:John Mulaney

“One of my great experiences in life was to be interviewed on a late-night talk show by a guy named Tom Snyder. He was interviewing me on a book I had written on the New Testament of the Bible called Rescuing the Bible from Fundamentalism, and we talked about the dating of the books of the New Testament, and I said, "Well, the consensus is that the gospels were written some forty to seventy years after the crucifixion." And he stopped me and said, "Wait a minute, Bishop, that means they couldn't have been written by eyewitnesses."”

“The world, I think, has too many late-night talk shows.”

Thinking World Shows Night Late Talk Shows Late Night

Author:Neil deGrasse Tyson

“My name is indigenous to my country, it is not easy to pronounce, it takes effort to say correctly and I am absolutely in love with the sound of it and its meaning. Also, it's not the kind of name you baby, slip into sweet talk mid sentence, late night phone conversation, whisper into the receiver kind of name, so, of that I am glad.”

Kind Country Night Names Easy Sound Effort Sweet Baby Conversation Late Phones Sentences Glad Slips Indigenous Receiver Late Night Sweet Talk

Author:Warsan Shire

“A lot of late nights in the gym, a lot of early mornings, especially when your friends are going out, you're going to the gym, those are the sacrifices that you have to make if you want to be an NBA basketball player.”

“My painting technique has not changed that much over time, although perhaps I am painting tighter and with more detail, in spite of a desire to loosen up and paint more expressively. One thing that has changed is my daily routine. I used to paint quite late into the night. It was a time I felt the creative spirits most active. As I have aged, my circadian rhythm has changed. I like to paint early in the day when I can avoid falling into the soul-sucking email world. Early dawn feels very similar to late night.”

World Spirit Desire Night Fall Creative Changed Painting Paint Rhythm Spite Late Night

Author:Mark Ryden

“People don't get that being a musician is a job, they don't get what the work takes. And that's just because you're living a dream, so everyone who's observing it from the outside can't really empathize with how much work it is because you're fortunate. And it's a kind of competition with yourself to stay away from all of the excess, whether it's booze or drugs or just the late nights with the addiction to watching the sun rise in some weird part of the world. But when you meet the other musicians, there's generally a spiritual exhaustion that you connect with.”

People World Kind Dream Spiritual Night Drug Musician Competition Addiction Observing Exhaustion Late Night Sun Rise

Author:Kevin Drew

“The only thing that I would say to anyone doing late night shows is - it took me a couple years then - but when you leave the studio, it's over. That's what you really have to do. After a long time, I would be like, "Maybe I shouldn't have said this," or "Maybe I shouldn't have shown this." But eventually, I got to, "Ah, f - k it." That's what it was that night, tomorrow's the next night.”

Long Night Couple Late Night

Author:Craig Ferguson

“Many of you might already recognize me as the guy in the question-mark suits appearing in the late night TV commercials and on the cover of educational books and CDs.”

Book Might Night Guy Tvs Late Mark Educational Suits Cds Appearing Late Night Question Mark Tv Commercial

Author:Matthew Lesko

“I started on 'Saturday Night Live' the same time Conan started on 'Late Night.' We just had a relationship because I would be upstairs in the studio and whenever he couldn't get a guest - which was often back then since he was just starting out - he would just call me down to be a guest.”

Would Be Night Late Starting Studios Call Me Guests Saturday Saturday Night Upstairs Starting Out Late Night Saturday Night Live Conan

Author:Norm MacDonald

“I feel my shows are like a late-night talk show that we settle down and do every night.”

Feels Shows Night Late Down And Settling Every Night Settling Down Talk Shows Late Night

Author:John Mayer

“Twelve-piece cookware sets for ninety-nine bucks are routinely hawked on late-night TV - often by friends of mine. But with a mere five pieces, you can do whatever you like - slay the dragon and then cook its tenderloin in the style of the duke of Wellington, if you want to.”

Ifs Want Night Can Do Five Pieces Style Mines Tvs Late Mere Nine Cooks Dragons Twelve Ninety Bucks Dukes Ninety Nine Late Night Wellington Cookware

Author:Mario Batali

“I learned how fast you can go from being an international hero to being a reference in a joke on a late night talk show.”

Shows Night Hero Late Jokes International Talk Shows Late Night

Author:Michael Phelps

“'American Horror' goes for a very specific kind of Seventies suburban downer ambience - 'Flowers in the Attic' paperbacks, Black Sabbath album covers and late-night flicks like 'Let's Scare Jessica to Death.' It even has 'Go Ask Alice'-era urban legends.”

Kind Night Asks Black Flower Horror Late Albums Eras Scare Legends Urban Seventies Sabbath Jessica Late Night Attics Black Sabbath Downers Ambience Album Covers Urban Legends

Author:Rob Sheffield

“I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.”

Two Shows Night Feet Six Late Bars Parks Host Amusement Too Short Talk Shows Late Night Amusement Parks

Author:Jon Stewart

“Limit or eliminate late-night computer and television viewing. A computer or TV screen may seem much dimmer than a light bulb, but these screens often fill your field of vision, mimicking the effects of a room filled with light.”

May Light Seems Night Rooms Vision Effects Fields Television Tvs Limits Computer Late Filled Screens Bulbs Late Night Light Bulb Mimicking

Author:Andrew Weil

“You know, I always was an early morning or late night writer. Early morning was my favorite; late night was because you had a deadline. And at four in the morning you make up some of your most absurd jokes.”

Knows Night Morning Four Late Jokes My Favorite Absurd Deadline Early Morning Late Night

Author:Joss Whedon

“By now, it is probably very late at night, and you have stayed up to read this book when you should have gone to sleep. If this is the case, then I commend you for falling into my trap. It is a writer's greatest pleasure to hear that someone was kept up until the unholy hours of the morning reading one of his books. It goes back to authors being terrible people who delight in the suffering of others. Plus, we get a kickback from the caffeine industry.”

“He liked cheap women, fast cars, late nights, and hard liquor, especially all together. In Jack's view, you are obliged to sin on Saturday night so you'd have something to atone for Sunday morning. Otherwise, you'd be putting the preacher out of business.”

Hard Together Night Sin Views Morning Car Late Sunday Preacher Saturday Obliged Liquor Saturday Night Late Night Sunday Morning Fast Car

Book:The Travis Family Series, Books 1-3: Blue-Eyed Devil, Smooth Taking Stranger and Sugar Daddy

Source: The Travis Family Series, Books 1-3: Blue-Eyed Devil, Smooth Taking Stranger and Sugar Daddy

“Loneliness is black coffee and late-night television; solitude is herb tea and soft music. Solitude, quality solitude, is an assertion of self-worth, because only in the stillness can we hear the truth of our own unique voices.”

Source: Mad at Miles: a blackwoman's guide to truth

“Lavina led me to an abandoned warehouse. I think that at some point someone decreed that all clandestine meetings must be held in one. Woe to the criminal overlord who lives in a city thriving with commerce, with no empty warehouses to be found. He probably needs to build one, just to have a place to arrange late-night meetings. (Bewitched)”

Thinking Needs Night Found Cities Late Empty Meetings Criminals Abandoned Commerce Woe Late Night Warehouse Clandestine Bewitched

Book:Tales of the Otherworld

Source: Tales of the Otherworld

“I'm always amazed at friends who say they try to read at night in bed but always end up falling asleep. I have the opposite problem. If a book is good I can't go to sleep, and stay up way past my bedtime, hooked on the writing. Is anything better than waking up after a late-night read and diving right back into the plot before you even get out of bed to brush your teeth?”

Ifs Way Writing Trying I Can Book Ends Problem Past Night Fall Sleep Bed Late Opposites Wake Up Teeth Plot Waking Amazed Brushes Going To Sleep Hooked Bedtime Diving Late Night Falling Asleep

Book:Role Models

Source: Role Models

“Really, it had been stupid to expect anything anyway. A few late nights does not a habit, or a relationship, make.”

Doe Night Stupid Habit Late Late Night

Book:Along for the Ride

Source: Along for the Ride

“I want to remember it all, the good times and the bad times, the late nights, the boozing, the dancing into dawns, and all the great and not-so-great people I met and loved in those years.”

People Want Years Remember Night Mets Late Dancing Dawn Good Times Great People Bad Times Late Night

Author:Ava Gardner

“Sometimes in my tent, late at night, I think I can hear the stars scraping against the sky.”

Thinking I Can Sometimes Night Stars Sky Late Hearing Novelists Night Sky Tents Late Night Scraping 5th Wave

Book:The 5th Wave

Source: The 5th Wave

“The news of life is carried via telephone. A baby's birth, a couple engaged, a tragic car accident on a late night highway - most milestones of the human journey, good or bad, are foreshadowed by the sound of a ringing.”

Humans Life Is Night Sound Journey Car Baby Birth Couple Late News Accidents Engaged Tragic Telephones Highways Milestone Late Night Car Accident

Author:Mitch Albom

“If you succumb to the temptation of using violence in the struggle, unborn generations will be the recipients of a long and desolate night of bitterness, and your chief legacy to the future will be an endless reign of meaningless chaos.”

“Loneliness is black coffee and late-night television; solitude is herb tea and soft music.”

Night Black Loneliness Television Solitude Late Music Is Coffee Tea Being Alone Herbs Late Night Black Coffee

Book:Mad at Miles: a blackwoman's guide to truth

Source: Mad at Miles: a blackwoman's guide to truth

“Sure, losing an election hurts, but I've experienced worse. And at an age when every day is precious, brooding over what might have been is self-defeating. In conceding the 1996 election, I remarked that "tomorrow will be the first time in my life I don't have anything to do." I was wrong. Seventy-two hours after conceding the election, I was swapping wisecracks with David Letterman on his late-night show.”

Firsts Has Beens Two Self Shows Might Age Night Politics Hours Hurt Tomorrow Late Losing First Time Election Seventies Might Have Been Brooding Late Night Letterman Swapping

Author:Bob Dole

“Do me a favor... Stand up, walk to wherever the nearest window is, and just look outside. You may not know this, but there's an entire planets-worth of summers, friends, sunsets, street lamps, songs, late nights, great films, and night skies waiting for you. Your life is as amazing as you want it to be, but first, you have to let it be that way.”

Knows Way Want Life Firsts Looks May Film Life Is Night Song Waiting Walks Sky Streets Planets Late Summer Window Favors Sunset Lamps Night Sky Waiting For You Great Film Late Night

Author:Backseat Goodbye

“There's a late-night scene in every town, and everyone has something going on, ... I've heard good stories about (Syracuse); this is a very good party town, a good drinking place. I definitely would like to come back and check it out further. Do some more research, as I call it.”

Stories Humor Funny Night Party Heard Scene Late Research Towns Drinking Very Good Checks Good Story Late Night Good Drinking Syracuse Good Party

Author:Dave Attell

“I'm in the process of brainstorming with my marketing team and all that stuff, trying to come up with a concept for a late-night restaurant for people in Birmingham.”

People Trying Night Stuff Process Team Late Concepts Marketing Come Up Restaurants Late Night Brainstorming Birmingham

Author:Ruben Studdard

“I've certainly never taken the care of myself that I should have. On the contrary. I've done a lot of late nights without enough sleep and all that. But I've had fun. Whatever wrinkles are there, I've enjoyed getting them.”

Should Done Enough Care Night Fun Sleep Taken Late Should Have Contrary Enjoyed Wrinkles Late Night Had Fun Enough Sleep

Author:Ava Gardner

“When you do late-night TV, you do different jokes in the same place every night. When you're on the road as a comedian, you do the same jokes in a different place every night.”

Different Night Tvs Late Jokes Comedian Every Night Different Place Late Night

Author:Jay Leno

“Any eyes on me - a late-night street sweeper, some dude texting in his parked car, the homeless guy talking to himself - make me feel uncomfortable when I skate. Everyone expects me to do certain things.”

Feels Eye Night Guy Certain Talking Streets Car Late Uncomfortable Homeless Skates Texting Late Night Sweepers

Author:Rodney Mullen

“David Letterman is the best late-night talk show host right now, hands down, and has been since he first took the desk.”

Firsts Has Beens Shows Hands Night Right Now Late Down And Host Desks Talk Shows Late Night Letterman

Author:George Lopez

“If there is electricity in every village, people will watch TV till late night and then fall asleep. They won’t get a chance to produce children. When there is no electricity, there is nothing else to do but produce babies.”

People Ifs Children Night Fall Chance Watches Produce Tvs Baby Late Village Electricity Shameful Late Night

Author:Ghulam Nabi Azad

“In today's America He (Jesus) has moved from the central figure of world history to source material for late-night comics and pundits who would not dare treat other religious leaders with such disrespect.”

“I would just like to say that after all these years of heavy drinking, bright lights and late nights, I still don't need glasses. I drink right out of the bottle.”

Needs Years Stills Light Night Drink Late Drinking Glasses Heavy Bottles Late Night Bright Lights Heavy Drinking

Author:David Lee Roth

“There's nothing terribly wrong with The November Man in a serviceable late-night cable TV sort of way but neither is there anything terribly right about it. It's unnecessary and derivative.”

Men Way Night Tvs Late Unnecessary Cables November Derivatives Late Night Cable Tv

Author:James Berardinelli

“Be there for your children. Sit on the bed and enjoy the late-night talks—try to stay awake! Pray for the Lord to inspire you. Forgive often. Choose your battles. Testify frequently of Jesus Christ and His goodness and of the Restoration. And most of all, let them know of your trust in the Lord.”

“What I really see myself doing is late-night TV. No woman has ever done it.”

Done Night Tvs Late Late Night

Author:Anna Benson

“The book the Ziff folks sent me as an example of their art was 'Late Night VRML 2.0 with Java,' 700 pages + CD-ROM, published February 1997. I was personally acquainted with more movie stars than people who might conceivably have wanted to buy this book or any book like it.”

People Art Book Might Wanted Night Stars Example Late Pages Folks Movie Star Cds February Late Night Java

Author:Philip Greenspun

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